Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Well thats it ... the holidays are over ! done and dusted...how sad :( but i must say im in a happy happy mood tonite. Things just seem to be falling into place for me...that pic i uploaded the other day has done a world of good for me...i certainly have days where i would wonder if i can really do this...and wonder if i can really get a toned body...whilst i am still very large...to me that pic showed lil bits of a good body coming thru. Late last week I was really starting to doubt myself over the "jump incident". When i started with fiona i was never gonna say no or i cant...and thats what i pretty much did by saying my foot was sore. When i told her initially she laughed then asked me why i thought i couldnt do it...did i think she was going to get me to jump over a sustained length of time or was it cos i didnt think i could get off the ground. I said the second reason. And that was all that was said...altho a few minutes later she asked me something and then said are u fibbing? lol but we were both laughing so its all cool, but i am wondering if she is going to get me to try and jump on thursday nite during boxing. The group fitness room is not used at this thursdays session and she likes going in there when its free so i suspect as no one else will be around she may try and get me to try and do it there. Went into the gym today...did just over 30 minutes...was sweating so i know i had a good workout.

I am really enjoying doing calories...i was watching biggest loser (us version) earlier...and bob was saying how...no fat milk only has 80 calories...lots of protein, carbs, and i think it was 6 grams of fibre...he was saying how its a perfect snack for after a workout...i never drink a glass of milk currently cos its 1.5-2 points depending which brand i have, but 123 calories which is how much the pura light one is...and knowing all the other nutritional components it has...its going to be something i am going to have more often. Whilst i think ww is a good basis for me...if two foods are 2 points each...one is full of different nutrients and one really isnt the fact im counting calories and checking the fibre content and protein level etc i would prefer to have the knowledge to check the right one. I know when i initially started ww in december i was eating hardly any processed foods....i want a fit body...i wanna eventually have definition...i want to have arms to die for and i need to feed my muscles correctly if i want them to develop correctly. I really have lost that focus of the scales since i have started to notice me get definition (ok only very slightly lol) ive only lost about 3 kilos in the last 5 weeks...but the difference in my shape has me on such a high...and lets face it...when i get down to goal...having a tight defined body is gonna mean a hell of a lot more then being 75 kilos but no definition. Today my food breakdown was :

You have used 1554 out of your net daily budget of 2000 calories and have 446 calories remaining. 32% of the calories are from fat, 25% from protein, 43% from carbs and 0% from alcohol.

Now im suppose to be having no more then 1770 calories...and my food should be made up of 30% fat, 30% protein, and 40% carbs....i think i got pretty close. The scales this week have moved more since saturday then they have for a few weeks so im very hopeful this limited processed foods with counting calories will really work...i was so scared about it...but the calorie king site is awesome...must admit today i had a red mars bar...last time i looked it wasnt listed on the ww tracker...chucked mars bar into calorie king and it came up wooo hooo was very happywith that.

Tomorrow nite i am skipping the gym since its my first day back at work and then thursday i have a PT session of boxing (kinda worried about that LOL never know i may end up jumping lol) wish me luck i have a non stressful with limited rude customers at work tomorrow...enjoy all !

Monday, March 30, 2009

I am still pretty happy over the pics i loaded up yesterday. Its the first time i have really thought i can start to see a lil of my body shape coming out. Yesterday i went for a 25 minute walk...then met my sister up at the shops...last nite we had a bbq at mums...they only had sausages and marinated chicken wings so i ended up grabbing some marinated steak to take over.

This morning i went to the gym and told fiona about the photos she said she has my membership photo on file which is just off my face and she can really tell...anyway she said she would like to see the photos so i emailed her a link for them today. So did my resistance training...after my carry on for weeks that balancing on the half balls and doing squats without holding on i finally managed to do them...for two sets even. So was very impressed.

Then went and met mum, my sister and nephew at the shops...and we went to hungry jacks for lunch...disastrous eh? Nope...i had the grilled chicken burger and a diet coke...so very impressed with myself. Tomorrow i think i will go do a body balance class...think its on at 1pm ... then wednesday will be rest day and back in on thursday for my PT boxing session.

Can't believe tomorrow is my last day of holidays....im not overly bothered...i miss my routine altho it will be a adjustment getting up at 6.45am on wednesday morning !

Not much else to say...off i go..enjoy ur monday all !

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Pic Update

Just a quick pic update...i am kinda amazed at the pic LOL

March 29 2009 :

Febuary 20 2009

Saturday, March 28, 2009

The good and the bad

wel im sick yet feel great. Okies so as i said last nite...i was going to weigh in this morning and log me weight on jillians site...not so great 136.4 kilos. Then as I promised myself i got dressed and headed to the gym...i need to find a decent tasting and nutritionally balanced protein shake for those early mornings at the gym i just cant do breakfast before i go. Anyway so i grabbed a banana on the way there...got there a bit early so got on the bike for 15 minutes YES on level FIVE...i cycled for 15 minutes and in that lil ole 15 minutes i cycled 6.64kms, my heart rate was between 131 and 144 and i also burnt 100 calories. I then went to body pump...yes very proud...i made it there and did it...and it wasnt too bad people...its prolly one of the better classes I have done...I liked it much more then RPM...i was actually 20 minutes into it before i even looked at the time lol. So i walk in theres a trainer there ive never met before...talking to one of the trainers i do know sarah...so i walk up and say i havent done this class before...sarah says oh karyn takes PT so her form for lunges and squats etc should be fine lol...mostly i coped okay...the stomach muscle exercises prolly tested me the most and were a lil hard...but i did them...so yay me...so the class went for 60 minutes and i really did bust my butt. I am going to aim to initially do that once a week...i think i may talk to fiona about changing my tuesday PT session to a monday cos the only evening class of pump is on tuesday evening. Anyway i then came home and have been in bed all day since...i really have felt off colour on and off for a few days and this afternoon/evening ive felt like ive had a fever as well as a headache. My fan has been on me...yet ive been cold...maybe i over did it this morning? i maybe i have just caught something...im not sure...but im hoping spending all day in bed and a good nites sleep and ill feel better.

As for food....I have done great today...im on 1770 calories...ive eaten 1686 calories...with 31% being from fat, 23% from protein and 46% from carbs,,,,im suppose to be aiming for 30% for fat and protein and 40% from carbs..i dont think i did too badly...eating protein is always a issue for me...im not a big meat eater but after those blood tests of course i need to bekeeping that protein up.

I also changed my PT session to monday morning this week...so i can see my sister on her last evening here (tuesday nite). Not much else to say...presuming i feel fine tomorrow i am going to walk around to mums in the afternoon...its about a 50 minute walk and hopefully my feet done hate me after for it...but they seem better with my gym shoes so we will see how it goes.

Jo - thanks for the compliment about the layout...i must confess i did it all on my ownsome =] i have dabbled with graphics and web design for years...and being able to do my own blog layouts was always something i wanted to do and so one day i thought bugger it im gonna figure this out....so i whipped up the image in paint shop pro...and then worked out the html side of it...must say i like it...and i love that i know have control so i can change it at the flip of a coin...mite have to do a jillian or L word layout next LOL

Friday, March 27, 2009

JIllians way or the highway....

So last nite i spent some time on Jillians site then pulled out her book. Firstly as i think i wrote yesterday i am going to go to calories...i am going to entrench myself in the "jillian way" and my focus is going to change somewhat. I am to be on 1770 calories per day, i am to make up my food intake with 30% protein, 30% fat, 40% carbs. I sat down with her book last nite and read and reread the chapter on reading nurritional labels till i actually understood it all ! Of course our labels are slightly different...but this is a important part of it all...i am really working on getting my focus on fueling my body more so then...whats to eat? Jillian has a new book coming out (april 9 i think) called mastering your metabolism, i will be getting it and reading it to death, there is plans for PCOS and its something i wanna study...this is something that ive thought about over the last few weeks...jillian did a radio show where she talked about how she is continually reading, whether its websites, health magazines, or books. I wanna take a leaf out of her book in this area especially on about fuelling my body right. So if ever anyone sees good links about nutrition...about the foods for building muscles, the foods we shouldnt eat chemicals, way foods are produced...i would love anything you see and find. Tomorrow morning i will register my weight on jillians site...i will then be getting my ass to the gym. Ahhhh the gym....ever since my post the other day i have been thinking a lot about the gym...and firstly Katali thank you for your post ! Even before you had commented i knew this was something I am going to need to talk to fiona about...not so much cos i told a fib...but cos she needs to know where my thinking is at...she is often telling me i am so more confident in the gym...but in a lot of ways im not. Sure i have that bravado sauntering around the gym...eyeing of her royal hawtness lol but in actuality im still chit scared of the gym. I have seen many posts were someone on the ww forum has posted and said im worried about going to the gym...im worried what people will think....and ive responded with hell i was at the gym at 150 kilos no one is concerned with what u are doing just go (shame i am not so good at taking my own advice) yes ive been going to the gym...and my 2 PT sessions per week i LOVE i truly truly love them....so they get two bonus ticks. I am still petrified of the treadmill...i get on it and i have visions of me rolling my ankle and injuring myself, i dont use the ecliptical trainer (or how ever you spell it) ive used the rowing machine once in the last 6 months and i occassionally use the bike...but even when i go on the bike i am like well im just warming up i dont need to go fast. Before when teri was my trainer and she use to get on my ass (even tho i hated it) i use to cycle 12 kms in 30 minutes. I enjoy structured classes but i still have that whole "im too fat i dont belong here" syndrome...today i went to go to her royal hawtness's body pump class...ive never done body pump before i spent 40 minutes trying to decide whether to go or not...i then got dressed walked down the street and waited at the bus stop...well guess who didnt get on the bus? yep u guessed it...ME i completely chickened out and went home. I am not utilising the gym to the best of my ability...and half the time people say to me im so impressed with all your gym workouts in honesty half the time im not. Now this isnt a whine post lol dont get me wrong...but i need to get over this...i need to master what is doable at the moment and then constantly challenge myself. I want nothing more then to impress fiona...when she see's i've improved and she tells me....well i love that feeling...i want to shock her....i want her to sit back and go holy hell whats happened to you? But more importantly i wanna walk in that gym and OWN it...i wanna become the fitness class princess...so ive set down a action plan. Tomorrow morning i AM going to her royal hawtness's body pump class...straight after i am going on that bike and at level 5 i am going to do the fatburner program for 30 minutes. No more of this spending 25-30 minutes at the gym bullcrap...no doing a 30 minute PT session and then going home...one hour MINIMUM...i still think like a gal of 170 kilos and who am i kidding? I mean honestly i proved it tuesday nite...i CAN do a hour....so everytime im in there...when i do a class or a PT session its gonna be followed by 30 minutes on that bike...me and the bike are gonna start some heavy duty bonding ! I never exercise on sundays...oh i cant get to the gym so i cant exercise...a HOUR long dvd every sunday without fail...seriously im over the excuses i give myself..while i joked and laughed about the slight amount of change i can see in my arm where obviously there is some muscle there...its just proven to me that i can shape my body....that its not a myth that happens to everyone but kazz. I have a lot of work still to do on me...and my focus needs to be on and stay on this journey...the relationship, the social life everything else will follow. Thats not to say im not gonna be having my social life...i am....but its all gotta take second place to my weight loss..so without a doubt friday nites are NOT drinking nites...they cant be....cos every single saturday morning i have off...i am going to be at the gym and i am not doing it with a hangover. This isnt just about weight loss...its about my confidence...i know on here and online and even my friends i am very close to i have a lot of bravado...yes i have the smart alec mouth...but it hides my lack of confidence...i wanna be able to go somewhere or meet someone and be proud of myself...to walk in and say,...check me out ! I will weigh in tomorrow as i said...then lookout babee...also over the next few days as my sister is down i will get her to take a couple of photos and i will update them on the blog so keep a eye out for them...and wish me luck at body pump tomorrow...have a good weekend all...

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Lurve those arms...

I woke today and thought...i wanna pie...i really wanna pie...i dont go to ww so i can right? straight away i was like wholly shit ! So it took me all of about 5 minutes to decide im going back to ww. So even tho i have thrown out my weigh in book - oops ! I will be going back on monday night...(just gotta find the weigh in book) Im listening to Jillians radio show and shes talking about how u have to constantly reanalyse your plan constantly....giving myself feedback...and what ive decided...is im gonna go back to ww I plan to use the etools...but i am planning to use the forum boards on jillians site (have just resigned up with it) I am over over over the ww forums....but i am too scared to go from points to calories....it seems difficult...so im gonna take the parts of all the things i know and use it to the best of my ability.

I went to the gym this morning...had a PT session....fiona is like...what do u wanna do? im like i dont care...shes like resistance or cardio? im like i dont care...shes like which are u least likely to do on ur own? ummm cardio...ok cardio...so u wanna do boxing or (and at this time she looked over at the stair climber) im like...erm boxing pls hahhahaha ! And she killed me....my arms ached....and once again i was sweating lol

Last nite went to dinner with tania...anyway....before tania turned up i looked down at my arms....and i noticed this very slight curve where the bicep muscle is (mind u the arm is still fat) anyway i took a pic of my arm and studied it which just confirmed its fat hahah but anyway...so me and tania are at dinner...i look down still see the curve in my arm...so i proceed to tell tania...we then walked out the restuarant and walking down the street...again i mentioned my arm LOL...i was quite fascinated...lol and i cant stop looking it

Anyway...i have a lil bit of a cold...so im gonna go lay down for a bit...have a good day all


Something from todays training session has been playing on my mind. Fiona wanted me to do these scissor jumps..so one foot in front and one foot back andu do a slight jump and swap the feet...i was like you want me to jump? shes like you dont need to take your feet off the ground much...she said hows ur foot and i came out with some rubbish about yeh its kinda been sore...for the life of me i dunno why i didnt say i dont think at my size i can jump...that my thighs would slap against themselves and hurt me...for the life of me i dont get that....so i kinda misled her and must admit i feel a lil bit disappointed in myself. I dont feel great...not just that i woke up last nite with a lil cough...i went back to sleep...i was coughing some more when i woke...i also have what feels like a tension headache...wonder why i think so bloody much? lol i know the headache is prolly cos of worrying that i kinda lied to fiona this morning. I also have been really looking at jillians site more...ive decided i am gonna start doing calories as of monday. I will go to ww and weigh in....but i am primarily gonna focus on jillians plan and really focus on those gym workouts. I think why its really bugging me about fiona....is ive never said NO to her...i mite sometimes look at her in disbelief but ive never said i can't, never said i dunno about this...never said no....she gives me something....i do it...everything she says to me i take it in....i do completely trust her and shes the first trainer i ever have...and so in a sense there is a lil disappointment there in myself.

Okies gonna go watch some more of frontline...enjoy all

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Sweat babeee Sweat

Went to the gym last nite...did 30 minutes of resistance followed by 30 minutes of boxing. Fiona commented how much my fitness levels have increased...she was like remember when we would break all the time cos u were woozy or tired...she like i use to plan breaks into our workouts now i dont lol At the end she said....next time we can do 60 minutes of boxing...i must have looked at her like...ur insane woman lol cos she was like dont worry we would pace it out LOL at one point she even had me squatting against a wall boxing like chit ! LOL

My thighs are a lil sore today but nothing major.

Tonite off to dinner and the movies with tania...which should be fun.

Anyway gonna keep this short and sweet i have lots of important chit to do like make lunch and watch dr phil and oprah lmfao byesssssssssssssss

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

<3 holidays

Well have to say this holiday life suits me damn well ! LOL im loving it. This morning i met up with 4 friends i went to school with...we went to a coffee shop...one friend sat there eating baked cheesecake...but i just had a hot chocolate. It was nice seeing them...but they lead very different lives to me...and im afraid cake decorating and kids i dont have a lot of interest in. Then this afternoon i met up with jaimee (the blond chick in the main photo of the page layout) we went to a lil cafe cos she wanted lunch,,,,i hadnt had lunch...so simply had a tomato bruscetta with a small piece of chicken from Jaimees salad...was all very nice....and this bruschetta had so much tomato on it....perfect filled up on 0 point food ! LOL This evening i have a double PT session...I am presuming 30 minutes resistance followed by 30 minutes of boxing. BUt will find out for sure this evening...think i will be sleeping good tonite.

Tomorrow is a mostly lazy day...need to go to the gym during the day and then tomorrow evening me and tania are going to the movies and out for some din din.

Had a nice surprise yesterday...found out my sister is arriving saturday arvo for about 4 days,...so thats really good timing with my holidays too.

Okies time to go get ready for the gym...have a good tuesday all !

Monday, March 23, 2009


I know u been here woman my tracker tells me so ! LOL check your msn sometime pls xox

Just because I can....

Yesterday I didnt do a hell of a lot. Laid in bed ill close to 12.30pm lol watching biggest loser US series 2...i just discovered 2 of the people in that series ended up getting married...lol so im really into it...its rather good.

The gym rang me this morning and they are putting my direct debit off for a week...yet another reason why i love this gym. Anyway went into the gym did 30 minutes on the treadmill...upping the grade to 2.5....my feet seem to be handling it better not so long ago the burning of my feet woulda stopped me way before 30 minutes.

Am now back home watching dr phil and then oprah...then heading over to mums. I am cooking them dinner tonite...so im making my version of chicken pollo pasta and tia maria bananas minus the tia maria for dessert lol

Tomorrow morning i am catching up with 4 friends i went to school with for morning too...should be interesting...they are all mum so i hope it aint child care talk hahahah

Okies off i go..have a good day all =]

Sunday, March 22, 2009

One very busy mind...

...I have had tonight. Let me explain...now I cant remember whether i blogged this before or not...think i did...then deleted it. Anyway as a few of u may remember i have a friend robyn...shes someone who at different points we have both said to each other we have considered asking out but never has the timing been right...but thru it all...we have always remained friends. Anyway she started holidays today too so for the last week or so one of us has messaged the other saying "2 days to go" or whatever..so as she finished yesterday and i finished work today...saw her online last nite and said "you must be happy"...her response wasnt what i expected and she replied "why..cos i was dumped last nite?" (briefly she had started to date someone...which i discovered at a social outing a few weeks ago) anyway i was like oh u know sorry...etc etc...she was having a few beers and firstly she turned around and said im real sorry if i hurt u or made u feel crappy when you found out about jayne...i was like nah its kewl...she apologised several times...then she said...are u sleeping the night on saturday nite (next sat nite is her 30th birthday and the hall has beds where we can crash) i was like yeh maybe...and shes like...if u like after the cleanup is done in the morning i can drop u home...so im thinking...ok....kewl....then she starts telling me how her and her sister are looking at renting a place together out at new haven...shes like u will have to come to the housewarming party...i was like kewl....and shes like and cos of how far away it is you will have to stay the nite...im like ok that works....now at this point im starting to get the vibe shes flirting...but she is drinking....and she does have a tendancy in my opinion to flirt with me when shes had a few but not when shes sober...so i didnt read too much into it...but once i said goodnight...i started to think about the "what ifs" she is flirting and interested and for a few minutes actually considered that kind of situation...and what i realised....and i say this in a complete positive frame of mind...its not for people to post oh kazz your so wonderful u will eventually meet someone (i am a princess after all with a incredibly healthy ego LOL) but i realised i cant do the relationship thing at the moment. With robyn theres a couple of reasons why i cant the main one being i dont wanna risk her friendship like i did felicity, the other is robyn is short hahah we would look like the gnome and the giant...but also and i know partly in the past i have prolly used my "fat" as a armor to prevent myself from getting in a relationship...as ive said before...when your 170 kilos people dont even ask if u have a partner they dont expect someone of that size to be in one (doesnt mean it doesnt happen just not expected) I have noticed lately i am being asked more by friends "so how is the love life going"...so maybe there is that worry now that i am starting to think people have that expectation...anyway im going off on a tangent...anyway i started thinking omg i cantbe in a relationship and have someone see me naked looking like this...im not ready for that...i still need this to be incredibly selfish and all about me...

I was just talking to my friend dayne, and she pointed out just like a weight loss journey you have to be mentally ready to let someone into your life...and maybe right at the moment im just not ready..that im still preparing myself mentally for that. BUt as dayne just pointed out to me on the same hand i need to spread my wings more and need to chat more in the social situations (despite my journal especially when its in a group i am rather shy when i initially meeet people) and yes jody i know online im this huge flirt and chatty person...and i truly wish i could very easily transpose that to my real life...but it does take me time...but i do think as my weight reduces this will also improve.

OKies its 1am (but i dont have to work tomorrow lalala) and im still chatting to dayne...so im gonna go finish chatting to her then head off to sleep...ni ni people

Saturday, March 21, 2009


I don't have to go to work for 10 days !!! YAY !!!

I am one happy girl...that customer from yesterday bugged me all last ntie...i spoke to my boss about it today...i think the whole depression thing made it worse (must admit i havent taken my meds for a few weeks) Dan basically said...was one phone call you have over 7 years of service which proves ur not rude to customers. Then after everyone left...he called me over to do my bi monthly one on one....all my results were way above the minimum...then he said...do not let this customer rattle you and do not worry about this over your holidays....so i feel much better (and yes back taking the meds)

Realised today my wage was $250 short !!! CHIT !!! my public leave loading didnt go thru which was worth $250 and that was to pay for my electricity bill...so i did pay it...but then realised i was short money...so ive had to email the gym and ask if my payment can be delayed by 8 days....im just about to start a new contract with them so hopefully it is fine...pissed me off...cos i put the loadings in for the first time ever it didnt upload properly...oh well at the worst i wont go to the gym for a week which will just mean my jillian dvds will get a work out LOL

I need to start thinking about a present for Robyns bday....i did think about sending her a bunch of flowers...but im undecided...she oftens says no one ever sends me flowers so im sure she would like it, otherwise i need to come up with something.

I have had another day of spot on with my points....okies...off for a shower...have a good nite all ;)

Up earlier then the birds...

...my alarm was set for 7.30am this morning and I was awake 6.15am think i mite be excited about going on leave? lol

I dropped 700 grams overnight so starting to get back on track. Today is gonna be another day of spot on eating and I think as a treat tonite i will have home made chicken burger for dinner ,,,, yum yum. I got sent a email for a free month of that quickflix thing...so i have 3 dvds here to watch...the first series of ally mcbeal plus the first 7 episodes of frontline. So tonite I think i will sit down and watch frontline.

So something else of interest may be about to happen...im not gonna say what in case things don't transpire...but I spoke to someone last nite and things went awfully well...i will tell u all more by next weekend at the latest...anyway im gonna go crawl into bed for another 40 minutes or so...have a good saturday all !

Friday, March 20, 2009

Gawd what a pain in the ass today was. I had a run in with someone incredibly rude...seriously some people are just so damn rude. Then on the bus coming home im listening to my mp3 and the lady next to me starts staring im thinking wtf does she want....she then goes "its very loud" another lady (who she was with) goes its fine lol like damn its not loud...even when i hold it loose...she may have heard a whisper if shes got bionic hearing (one of the ear pieces doesnt even work) lol

Anyway when i finished work i got changed for the bus and headed off to the bus stop...and started thinking...mmmmm kfc....i was so friggin tempted to skip the gym and get kfc. Amazing how i can try and convince myself "oh it would be good to get the desire out of my system" but i didnt...i did go into the gym...did 20 minutes on the bike at level 4....in 20 minutes i cycled over 8km and then i went to go on the only spare treadmill and it gave me a "system overload" error dammit....then i went on the rower at level 7...think 1000 metres was optimistic of me...i did 500 metres and i was looking at myself in the mirror and my face was red as hell LOL I walked out knowing even tho was only 25 minutes i did work hard as hell for those 25 minutes...from now on everytime i go to the gym im gonna do that rower....monday i will aim for 550 metres. On the bike...in 20 minutes i burnt over 100 calories which i thought was pretty impressive

PS Jody - i sent u a offline msn message with a link for your daughter for L word online series...if you didnt get email me or leave me a message here

The holidays are getting closer...

Starting to get really excited about my 10 days off now. I will be a very excited girl 5pm tomorrow nite lol. Woke up very sore this morning all around my upper back, chest, and upper arms - must thank my trainer when i see her next ! lol I finish work at 4pm today then heading in to the gym, planning to do 30 minutes on the treadmill followed by rowing for 1000 metres....lol...lets see if I can do that.

The scales went up 2.5 kilos this morning ! But i have some stomach cramps so guess the wonderfulness of TOM is headed my way.

Theres really not too much else to say...roll on saturday 5pm is all i can say...oh and all my ebay items finish over the next 24 hours...wish me luck !

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Up bright and early on a day off

Well up bright and early thanks to the workmen working on the house next door - thanks guys !!! lol anyway my eyes are still playing up...the problem being i cant take anything with ibuprofen in it ( so that rules out the likes of nurofen etc), panadeine forte which is what i am suppose to take knocks me out too much so i prefer not to take it...i think today i will stay away from the puter (after this post) and just guzzle water.

Went down 400 grams overnight ... which is good =] I went a lil crazy on ebay last nite. I bid on some lacy undies....mine all look like grandmas undies lol but these are real girly....they are brand new an size 20-22 and so they wont fit me just yet but will soon enuff. I also bid on a adidas tshirt which my bid is currently like $2.25 lol and another top for 0.99 cents...and this t shirt ill stick a pic up cos its hilarious

That tshirt i so wanna win...cant imagine why lol anyway time to go make me scrambled eggs...followed by my pt session...have a good day all



Mum ended up asking me to meet her for lunch. So i headed to the gym....and u know my life is far from boring...so i get there early have 30 minutes to spare so i hit the treadmill...my lil handtowel is hanging over the bar at the front where u hang on...and what happens?
LOL the towel fell...i shit myself cos i thought i was going to fall...then i thought the treadmill was going to eat my hand towel lol i couldnt stop the machine fast enuff luckily it flew off the end phew ! No wonder those treadmills freak me out. Then we did my PT session...i swear she has really stepped this program up...it was bloody hard and i am expecting to be sore tomorrow. We then spoke about the session i missed...and we have set for tuesday for my PT session to go for a HOUR ! I am guessing it will be 30 minutes of resistance training and 30 minutes of boxing...lawdie ill be a tired girl ! lol Did go to cafe primo today...i did have one of thier pizzas...it was thin style lots of capsicums, chicken and tomato...very yummi ! Okies off to go...gonna play some gammon before i head off to the shops to do some grocery shopping.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


I still have a lil headache. My intention is to go to the gym and do body balance tonite..if my head is still hurting i wont go tho...no sweat tho as I have a PT session at 10.30am tomorrow morning...and yes I do have tomorrow off. So will be visiting the gym, some housework and then grocery shopping in the evening. I am getting excited about how close my leave is...I only have to work friday and saturday then the next 10 days off. I have lots of plans apart from attending the gym everyday except sunday, every day is nice and busy some fun stuff plus some things like getting my will redone (the not so fun stuff), podiatrist appointment, blah blah blah but im really looking forward to just relaxing but NOT sitting on my butt at home.

I am also going to ATTEMPT going swimming...i thought if i do it on a day when the kids are at school i can see whether i feel confident enuff getting in and out of the pool. I went swimming last maybe 2 years ago...and i was petrified getting out of the pool...if i can tackle this i could start swimming once a week just to help stretch the muscles out and just for a bit of relaxation.

I think at the moment I am going to stick to the etools...i need something i can do from any computer online...doing it via calorie king or sparkpeople i guess theres that "worry" that the calculations are wrong. So i will pay for 3 motnhs of etools when my unlimited expires then make more decision from there.

Im back on track today...admittedly with all my oj and what not i have gained 800 grams,,,but im not concerned,,,,and tania yes ur right ! The old me woulda got kfc...unbelievable to think i have not eaten KFC this year...admittedly i have had dominos...but no pizza hut...no kfc...no fish n chips yay me ! haha but back on track...i am off for some fun training...have a good day all

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Being sick and at home allowed me to have plenty of time to "think"...I pulled out michelle bridges book again today...and sat there looking at her exercise regime that she recommends...so have decided this is gonna be my permanant schedule:

monday : RPM class or 30 minutes on treadmill and 10 on the rower
tuesday : PT weight session
wednesday : body balance
thursday : boxing
friday : day off
saturday : RPM or body pump

I rang up and made a appointment for the podiatrist for next thursday whilst on leave. I am pretty sure he will say i need inserts for my shoes made. Hopefully tho once he does that...on fridays and sundays i can start to go for walks. Not all those classes i am doing will burn calories but its more about me attending the gym...and gaining that motivation i seem to get from the gym.

Anyway enuff...back to bed for me
Have to say I am a lil over the ww forums. MY unlimited finishes on 16th april...at that point i need to figure out how i am going to track after that. I could simply do it in my lil journals...its free after all...or i could pay $30 per month for etools...my issue with this? Honestly i think ww should supply more....the etools layout has its issues...i dont like the layout (ive used the biggest loser club in the past and their layout is awesome)...so for my $30 or however much it is...i get etools...plus the forums...the forums which has bitching, non ww related topics and people shoving their opinions down your throat. MY thought is dont fix what aint broke...but the forums off and on piss me off...the last week they have been worse...if i resorted to calorie counting (lets face it whether its points or calories its all the same damn thing) i could use sparkpeople....it is free...i did look around it today....but it seems confusin as chit....then there is the biggest loser club...counts calories...the diary format is good...but what i recall there was not much existance of the forums.....the last option (OF COURSE) is jillians site,,,,$4 US dollars per week...it has a lot of things i like...she blogs and runs challenges...she has playlists she releases each month,,,workout plans...tracking for ur calories...and forums...im really undecided. Im really over those ww forums tho and anyone whose been there in the last week or so knows what i am talking about...

Apart from that....im still home with this migraine...i rang work dan was like id prefer u stay home and relax and get over it properly and who am i to oppose that? In all honesty its what i call the tail end of the migraine...i have in the past had the migraine mostly go...ive returned to work and within 24 hours the migraine has come back worse (Tania may recall this with me telling her to pull over so i can throw up from a migraine lol) so i prolly am being a lil more cautious. Tomorrow nite i will be at the gym...I will prolly do the body balance class...i need to get going to the gym and back into everything...

And OMFG @ who they sent home on biggest loser last nite !!! what a bunch of idiots....

Monday, March 16, 2009

Just a lil stumble

Well yet again I have found if I miss the gym for a few days I am quite as good as I should be...had way too much orange juice (why is ONLY water and diet soft drinks the only 0 point drinks?) way too much fish...yes I know all good foods but way too much of all. I made a couple of decisions today....firstly...I will never go more then 2 days without visiting the gym...it just screws me up...i dunno what it is about that damn gym but it keeps me so focussed (ok so maybe its the hawt chicks?) the other is...I need to go out everyday...it is too easy still for me to fall into bad habits. This is going to be interesting with me about to go on 10 days leave lol...friday nite there is a girls nite...but im working 9am saturday morning and i also need to attend the gym friday nite so i will prolly skip it. So now to decide what to do on sunday...i would like to go to the markets down at the pooraka drive in...it sucks that buses dont run till after midday here on sundays...ive never been there so not sure what timethose markets stay open till...anyone know? Tania? Jo?

Anyway no big drama i over ate...but its just a lil stumble....

Weigh In Day !

Well...weighed in this morning and I am now 134.8 kilos ! I lost 1.8 kilos this week...so my total loss is 36.1 kilos. I am wrapped for the last 12 months or more i have sat anywhere from 138 kilos up to 151 kilos...so i have now nailed that voodoo...i know as long as i count my points and do my exercise i will lose...EASY sure i may not lose big everyweek and i may even hit a plateau in the future but we will face that challenge.

I think my thinking has just completely changed. I watched biggest loser the other nite...and there is this girl whose there with her mum...her mum left her dad when she was young and she didnt see her mum much and part of the reason for them doing this is to try n repair her relationship with her mum...anyway jillian pretty much said to her ... u need to stop focusing on ur mum u cant control her u can only control you. I never truly understand the whole "women put others before themselves" i always thats only for women who are married with families etc...but i think back to a lot of my actions i realise im the same. I'll give a simplistic example...if i am playing someone in gammon who has been going thru a losing streak...i am more then happy to lose...cos i know i can handle losing...but if they been bitching and whining about it maybe they cant? I've also been thinking about how I always take the easy way out...when i was a teen...i attempted year 12 twice...not once did i even finish the year...it got a bit hard so i quit. And thats continued in my adult life...with pretty much anything thats a lil bit hard...whether it was learning to drive....or whatever its just been easier to quit. I never thought i'd be a gymer...mever thought I would be good in the gym...the fact i am good at the gym is shocking in itself but making me realise i CAN do this...in reality i CAN get my licence if i worked at it and didnt give up...i could even complete my schooling... i CAN do all those things just like i CAN get under 100 kilos !

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Day of rest...

Well another sleep in today.... damn im getting use to not waking till after 8am.

I watched the last episode of L word...like wtf?????? i still dunt know who killed jenny or even if jenny killed herself !! my gawd its worse then who killed JR....i then watched itty bitty titty committee...it was a really nice movie...not what i expected but i enjoyed it.

I watched thelatest episode of US biggest loser...i loved it !! Jillians team won 24 hours of pleasure...so they got chauffered away got dinner made for them (the lil buggers ate over 15,000 calories between 7 of em), then they had tequila shots...then one had some cigerettes and then they went off to the bar to finish getting plastered lol...jillian comes in the next day and goes off her nut....hahhahaha omg it was so funny....she was swearing like a trooper

Today gonna do a lil more housework...and not much else.

Monday week i am going over to mums for dinner and have told her i will cook. So have told her just have chicken breasts and pasta in the house ill pick up the rest...so gonna make my dish i had last nite actually...chicken pieces and onion fried with light evap milk added and spinich and for me and mum semi dried tomatos added mums hubby has gout so cant eat tomatos so he wont have any in his....then im gonna buy some meringue shells and fill with some of the nestles choc dessert and top with strawberries and bananas. All sounds delish to me !

The scales are still moving in the right direction...and i am incredibly proud without a meeting how well ive done this week....will i get under 135 kilos tomorrow? will i reach 35 kilos tomorrow? its like a huge who dunit !!!! hahhahaha i will let you all know tomorrow

Okies off i go...have a good day all

Saturday, March 14, 2009

New Look

yes i gave my journal a new look ! What do you think? I am loving it and not just cos i created it ! Yes tis true all my own handiwork and patience went into it...but im loving it so am wrapped !

I'm a happy gal...

Well slept in this morning and no way I could make it to RPM...so i will do one of my dvds later...prolly one of my jillian ones.

Today not planning much apart from domestic duties and some relxation. Gonna make one of my fave meals for dinner tonite (pasta with evap milk with chicken, spinich, onion and semi dried tomatos in it yum yum) then tonite i will sit down and watch the last episode of l word :( and then i also have another movie (which is NOT porn lol i told the boys at work the title and they were convinced its porn hahahah) but its got one of the girls out of l word in it and hahahha is called itty bitty titty committee lol

The scales are still looking good...

I was thinking last nite....and dunno why i was thinking this but i was wondering if im truly happy...i was thinking a lot about how life was 6 months ago and then also 3 years ago....and u know what people? I can truly say I am happy. Sure my job sucks at times but as long as its giving me money in my pocket i dont care, i finally am on track not just with weight loss but on a healthy lifestyle...ive never gotten into the gym like i have lately...and even tho sometimes i wonder why the hell i put myyself thru the torture haha i am glad i do...i always feel better for it...i am so busy these days what with work...then dashing to the gym...then home and doing dinner....that im not getting so much time in front of the computer or tv...so when i do i am really enjoying it...im finally getting what people mean about "me" whether its a soak in a tub, reading a book, outwatering my garden...im starting to appreciate that time more, i finally have a social life and friends...which is amazing in itself...what i am enjoying now is realising i dont have to say yes everytime they ask me out...i am putting me first...and if work or something else interferes with so be it...im not thinking...well if i dont go they will never ask me out again...im glad now that me and robyn are talking more too...we barely talked there for a bit unless i messaged her...now i realise she wasnt ready to tell me she was seeing someone...so its nice seeing that ole msn window with her....and getting a chance to talk to her...im really grateful for how proud i feel of myself right now...im not going to meetings...yet im losing...its making me realise where my focus truly is...finally i am being accountable to me....and thats what i truly need to do this and get fit and healthy and stay there for the rest of my life...so yep its a damn good day and i am a pretty happy chicka.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Keep reading .... theres a funny story...

Well did PT last nite....was boxing last nite...and she hammered me to say the least lol. She was focussing a lot on speed and balance...so my heart rate was definitely up. I expected to have sore arms today and they are a lil tired but they are fine. After the gym I grabbed a pepsi max while waiting for the bus....and i got stomach aches...same as i got a week ago after drinking pepsi max then too...the pepsi max i had admittedly had a slight strange taste...strange enuff that i checked the label...so i have about 6 cans of it at home...once they are gone i am gonna get off the stuff.

Anyway for funny story of the day, I live by myself so generally when im home im naked lol...anyway so last nite i went to eat one of those new ww potato bakes...so i take one mouthful and holy crap it falls on my boob anyway i so ladylike wipe it off and dont think too much else of it...i look down a hour or so later...and seei have a hige red mark with what looks like a blister...lol....i have blistering hawt boobs people ! lol

Everything else is going good...the scales have dropped down over the last two days and i may make my 35 kilos milestone on monday morning...will let you know then. Okies off to do some work ... enjoy your friday all

Thursday, March 12, 2009


Well took a sneak peek at the scales this morning expecting to be up anything up to 500 grams...to see the scales had gone in the opposite direction ! I really wonder if after yesterday seeing how i was exactly a month ago took some stress of me...and that helped...(or maybe im dreaming haha)

Didnt go to the gym last nite and honestly i was so glad...went home cooked a lovely dish of low fat carbonara...i then had a lovely hot shower...and visited ww chat whilst watching house. Was very nice and relaxing.

Tonite i am off to the gym for my boxing PT session. I am still sore from tuesday nite....my right hip/butt is sore plus the part of your chest where your arms join your body if that makes sense...im hopeful that when she stretches me out that may help.

This weekend I am having a "at home" weekend. Saturday morning i am planning to do RPM and saturday afternoon there is a fair on in the suburb i live in so may wander down to that. I need to get some housework done...as I dont wanna do it all when Im on leave LOL...saturday nite i will sit down and watch the final episode of L word -sob sob - and then I have another lesbian movie which has one of the girls from L word. I am really just out for some time out and catch up on the domestic chit before my leave startttttttttttttts ! yay only 6 working days left...okies...off i go..

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The scales went up but its goood !!!!

Okay....i know people will go oh kazz you shouldnt do that but deal with it this habit isnt going to change lol...but i do weigh myself most days twice a day....when i wake and often when i get home from work before dinner...anyway i came home tonite and the scales were the highest they been for a few weeks....137.1 kilos....i thought chit maintaining is one thing but to be putting on is another....i was severley pissed...but i came down and pulled up my blog and thought....i wanna know when i last had my period....cos i KNOW ive been spot on the only thing i can think is fluid retention and i did notice my jeans feeling a lil tighter this afternoon around my tummy. Anyway so im reading....and what do u know....i come to 11th febuary (and today is the 11th) where i had a completely bad day.....where i had crawled back to being online....and was moody....and then voila...15th feb i got my period....last time....i ended up 3 days of eating pizza...i feel ecstatic that ive made that connection....so yep for the next week or so the scales will suck,,,i think part of this is im becoming more a "normal" woman my last period was 6 days long which it NEVER normally is .... so i think this is just part of my body adjusting....and maybe even my PCOS starting to get under control...so even tho the scales have gone up....im friggin happy....its another sign of my body getting healthy =]

Its BONE babeeee BONE !!!

omg i cant believe this....i jsut went and scratched my leg...along the bone at the front of the leg between your knee and ankle....and OMG i felt bone...a ripple of bone all down my leg...i ahvent thought about bone there for years...i remember when i was younger i would run my fingers up and down it...and wooo hooo again ....theres BONE !!!!

sticks my fingers in my ears....

...and sings LALALALALA...only jokingggggggggggggggg ! LOL...thank you for the comments.

Went to the gym last nite....and omg ... lol .... one of the exercises she had me do was stand on these things they are like half a inflatable ball...so u stand one foot on each then do squats while trying to balance (they wobble like crap) so anyway i do a couple and im thinking....chit i hope these things dont burst....so i say theyre not going to burst are they? LOL shes like "no karyn they wont" lol then we went to these other things....which are a piece of equipment that the navy seals invented anyway they are bolted to the wall....and she goes...i will preface this before you ask...no it will not come off the wall hahahhah anyway was a hard as hell workout, we did pushups against this bar she really does not realise what a weakling i actually am lol. But the good news is I didnt get lightheadedness once ! YAY the iron is helping.

Food wise i was spot on again yesterday....i sneaked a peak at the scales...and am really wondering if i am at the start of a plateau but im remembering what jo always says about how her body shape changes when she has a plateau so its fine we will cope ! But there are a few things i need to fine tune...those lil ww fruit biscuits...ive been counting 4 as 1 point....well 4 is two points - ooops ! I also have my weetbix at work...use their milk and i just pour till my biscuits are covered and count that as a cup of milk....i seriously dont know how much it is...so my lovely sister sent me over a plastic cup with measurements on the side ... so will start bringing that in tomorrow so i can be more exact with that ... pretty much everything else i weigh .... to the point of being a nazi lol

I have also decided that once the unlimited ends on 16/4/09 i will then start tracking on paper. When i joined ww they gave me 2 12 week journals...so they would last me for 6 months...i have 2 mini points calculators plus my scales lol so i could do it via paper. And if i need anymore down the track i could simply ask tania to pick me up a couple.

As to the felicity and leigh thing...me and felicity did talk...i did tell her what i thought of certain things...and she told me all is kewl but she just doesnt wanna discuss leigh with me...which is fair enuff...so at this point we have agreed to be friends and life moves on.

Oh how cute is this....my manager went and bought everyone in my team a bertie beetle and ME???? ME i got scored a banana hahahahahahah !

Okies off i go

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Okay let me preface this by saying yes jody everything you said I have considered. My unliited membership doesnt run out till 16/4/09 so have plenty of time to just return and nothing change. That said I am trying not to focus on the fact ill be weighing at home...but cos everything will stay as is except for where i weigh in. Jumped on the scales this morning and was down 100 grams. I have decided this week I am going to be spot on with my points...so not 24.5 or 25.5 every day spot on 25 points...and then i wanna look at what loss i get. Yesterday on my scales i was 136.6 kilos (still not as great as on my docs scales !) I also think TOM may not be faraway i was one moody bitch last nite...needless to say i went to bed by 9pm lol. Me and Leigh did discuss the felicity drama via text last nite which prolly wasnt wise considering my mood...i told Leigh when she said she liked me at my bday i now wish i had told her to shut up lmfao....funnnily enuff she wasnt really appreciative of that comment ;) Anyway she was like...until u and felicity discuss this u will never sort this chit out...so this morning i sent felicity quite a lengthy private message on facebook...i completely expect her to answer with nothing to discuss we are fine...i told leigh last nite if this chit cant be sorted out i am going to need to break off friendships with both cos its friggin too much drama and does my head in.

Anyway onto other things...robyn messaged me last nite...her 30th is coming up weekend after this one she was like are u going to stay overnite? (the hall were they are holding it down at largs bay has beds) but i said as i dont know a lot of people going (i only know a handful) i prolly will go home that nite...robyn as like im gonna introduce you to my sister i think u two would get on real well...hell introduce me to the lesbians sounds better hahahh

Off to the gym tonite to start my new program....gawd only knows what she is going to have me doing this time...she told me she is going to mix it up more this time and she feels im at a intermediate level now so i highly doubt its gonna be overly easy but im sure its all do-able lol

Anyway not a lot else to say...have a good day all =]

Monday, March 09, 2009

Weigh in day....

Well jumped on my scales this morning and they are up. I was perfect yesterday so I am guessing its a combination of things...saturday nites meal (while i thought i picked well i could see oil in it and it was very spicy so i suspect it was high in sodium) also i suspect TOM could be on its way. I have just drank 1.2 litres of water to try and flush it out a bit (but i think its futile this close to weigh in) but its not the end of the world. Last week was a strange week with not being 100%, not exercising as much as usual...so even if i do gain not a big deal these things happen.

It is actually a public holiday here today but I am lucky enough to be working (do you detect the sarcasm in my voice?) After work i will go over and visit mum for a while before heading to my ww meeting.

Less then two weeks tho and i will have 10 days off ... cannot wait ! I am gonna try several classes of body pump during that time plus a few different classes like their stretch classes and try and see how i like them.

Okies heres some photos...the first photo is me in year 7 at high school...i am in the front row...third from the right...skinny lil b*tch i was...

Next is a couple of pics from saturday nite...(photos courtesy of tina and jo)


Well I have decided on some changes....let me explain...those who don't know me...may not know i dont drive...i have just sat down and worked out that paying $59.90 for unlimited per month plus $10 for a taxi home each week which takes the total to $99.90 per month. I have been thinking where do I get my motivation from....honestly its not my meeting...my leader is nice enough...but i dont find her motivating shes no "christina" I really get my motivation from the gym. Walking in there, have my 2 30 minute sessions per week with fiona where everything is focussed on my weight loss efforts...it would also give me a extra nite for the gym. The more I think about it the more for me i think this may be the way to go....I will weigh myself each monday morning...and we will see how I go this week...if its no good...I can always just return to meetings.

I was watching US biggest loser last nite...and jillian was going a bit nutso over this chick....who has no injuries...isnt old...yet she struggles the most....and it really got me thinking...yanno yeh my left knee hurts a bit and my right heel hurts at times....but really im healthy theres nothing stopping me from kicking ass in the gym, so whilst i never say i cant there are certainly times i wonder if i can...so im gonna start to more look at it as a challenge more so then...oh heres another thing i cant do

When leaving work today lynsey (one of the managers) stopped me and asked me how i was doing...i was like im good...she then said "you are looking really good your face is so slim now" heh felt awfully good....then she was asking me what exercise i was doing...was really nice...

Okies enuff posting...off to watch so you think you can dance

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Okay I was tagged

I've been tagged by Shelley at Shelley Shrinks

The Rules:

1. List these rules on your blog.

2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog.
3. Tell 7 unspectacular quirks about you.

4. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.

5.Link the person who tagged you.
6.Leave a comment for each blogger.

It could be nice if you post a personal photo with this post.

So, seven facts about me.

1. I spent 6 months living in Malaysia as a baby

2. I swallowed a 20 cent piece when I was younger which had to be operated on to be removed

3. I am a lesbian (ground breaking news I know)

4. I don't have a drivers licence yet have managed to be in 3 car accidents

5. I did ballet and dance as a kid and performed for a season at the opera house in "christmas at the opera house"

6. I did some modelling in a hair magazine as a kid

7. My dad is the most fabulous man I have ever known

7 Unspectacular Quirks

1. I was a supervisor in a bank for 10.5 years

2. When I get to a lower weight I wanna do a certificate in fitness

3. If I sit on the ground and stretch my legs out and point my toes...my toes touch the floor

4. My dad bought us a dog when I was about 4 ... I named her fritz.... I was loving fritz at the time....now I never eat it

5. Regardless of what anyone thinks I do think I am a princess and you will endear yourself to me more if you call me that lol

6. While I can be very unladylike at times...I love candles and all good yummi smelling stuff

7. I think jillian michael is to die for

8. I didnt tag anyone else cos I am a lazy ass and cant be bothered with blogger and adding links and chit...so if you read this and wanna be tagged...do it and lemme know and i PROMISE i will read it lol

The weekend

Well I was slack yesterday with posting eh? Lets see,,,friday nite i didnt go out...i came home cooked a yummi beef stirfry and had a early nite. Woke saturday morning feeling good...the increase in my iron is certainly helping me. Went to the gym and did RPM but sob sob i was late and had to sit at the back of the class (not great for perving hahah but i could see her arms nicely...and seriously these are arms to die for !) Did the class...i really need to get some nice and thick undies for that class i think...3 classes later and my ass still hurts on those seats. I do wonder while Im doing that class wtf i put myself thru the torture lol my thighs arent sore this morning...so either they are getting use to it or i didnt work hard enuff yesterday lol. Anyway then in the afternoon i went to see the doc...he told me that i am in the early stages of anaemia i told him this week by increasing my iron rich food i had started to improve...so we decided no supplements at this point and instead try and fix this by my diet. Hes told me any meal i have iron in i should have vitamin c with it...so with my weetbix at breakfast he recommended a mandarin or orange, lunch the same with my sandwich and also one at dinner. Now i dont mind mandarins but 3 in one day? I mite have to have a glass of orange juice at least one of those meals...and what this means is my distribution of points will change...mandarins are only .5 points so think i will mostly go for them. He then weighed me (loved his scales i was only 134 kilos on them lol), he measured me and im 174 cms not 173cms lol so not sure if that will change my goal by a kilo or so or not. He then also did my waist measurements and then told me i need to be retested and see him again in 3 months time...so yet ANOTHER person im accountable too lol

Then went out last nite. Tania drove in and it was nice to chat to her on the way in and out...was funnily enuff a lot of weight loss talk lol oh and maybe i mentioned how hawt gabby is to her too ! LOL Anyway dinner was lovely...i only really knew tania altho id met tina once before...and im always kinda quiet till i know people well...but they were all real nice gals. I had beef with lemon grass sauce was really yum altho a lot of oil came out of it...followed by a hot chocolate...i had 15 points left and had RPM'd it that day....my guess is cos it was so spicy it may have been high in sodium....so we will see how the scales treat me monday nite lol (im not expecting a big loss)

I was home by about 10.30pm...it was a nice nite i enjoyed...oh and drama free,,,,what a novelty lol

Okies...enuff rambling....despite it being a holiday tomorrow,,,,i do have to work and there is a meeting tomorrow nite...so ill be back after that !

Friday, March 06, 2009

so pissed off

omg im so pissed off right now and really wondering if i really should be. After 2 months of felicity saying she doesnt wanna discuss what happened, that it hasnt affected our friendship blah blah...i look at facebook and there is a status saying (and its not the point of some dumb ass electronic gift its what this symbolises !) she has sent whatever to 93 of her friends....she has 95 friends on facebook and guess who didnt get one? im so tempted to just delete her off facebook at the moment....im done ... im over all the chit...i just texted Leigh to say im not going tonite maybe its simply time to break contact with both of them,,,,,overrrrrrrrrrrrr it !

Its fridayyyyyyyyyyy yay !

Well FINALLY blogger is working ... it was being a ass earlier which pretty much goes along with my day so far ! Firstly i feel pretty good today...woke up about 6.50am and got up 40 minutes before my alarm went off...got up checked emails.etc etc....and headed off to work...missed my bus...had to catch a different bus...then once i got to work my ww ginger bar i had put in my bag wasnt there !!! it must have fallen out :(

I am starting my no cafe challenge today lol so i have on my desk at work...pink cardboard, textas and stickers lol..my lil art project

So yes leigh did message me and ask me about going to the wheaty tonite. Her ex apparantly rang her and asked her out while she was dealing with the kids and as she said when that happens she will say yes to anything lol so i said i will go but no going onto the mars bar for me after as i need to be in tip top shape for my perv session erm i mean my RPM class tomorrow morning ! lol...she said to me...kazz i never knew u could be shallow hahahhah....my thoughts? if you gotta go to the gym and can go when the view is good...go THEN !!!!

Whilst the doc said dont change my diet i have changed it a lil this week. I had a huge pot of spaghetti one nite with lean mince and lots of mushrooms and spinich, i have had roast beef or ham everyday for lunch and also another nite i made a pasta dish with a heap of spinich in it so i suspect all that spinich and red meat is helping. My trainer noticed last nite i didnt get lightheadedness at all...so i think i could be on to something.

Jody - thanks for those nice messages you left on msn (so unlike you !!!! LOL) and shelley i will do the tag thing over the weekend

Okies have a good friday all =]

Thursday, March 05, 2009

Not a good nite at all !

Well last nite was not a good nite. Went to bed around 9pm listened to Jillians radio show...then when it finished rolled over and went to try to sleep and suddenly i was getting pains in my stomach (same pain that took me to hospital in november)i got up took one of the tablets they gave me back then....got in a shower let the hot water run down my back for ages...got out felt okay...so fell asleep....come 1am i woke with the pains again...so went thru the same drama of another med and a hot shower...i then thankfully fell asleep till after 7am this morning. My stomach still feels a lil ginger ... so in my first break i am just gonna eat one weerbix and see how my stomach handles it...if that goes fine i will have the other 2 for lunch. I have decided on something...next week i am going to do a "princess's no cafeteria challenge" Our cafeteria at work got taken over by some new people...its much cheaper and much better....BUT they have lots of yummi snacky food ! They sell individual tim tams, bertie beetles, fudge and jelly beans. Now its all proportioned and when i have eaten them i have counted it in my points...but i think maybe i visit there too often LOL. So tonite i will pick up a sheet of cardboard and some stickers and chit and make a chart and stick it up on my desk at work and the aim is NO cafe visits all next week.

Tonite after work i have to dash to the gym for my PT session of boxing (or boxingmania as fiona called it last week lol) then i have to scoot from there off to the shops to get the grocery shopping done.

Hmmm just got a text from Leigh asking me if i am going to the wheaty friday nite...lol...

Okies off i go to do some work !

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Gym Plan..

I am starting to get excited...my brain is in a new and strange place...firstly i can't wait to go to the docs...i hate the docs and needles...ESPECIALLY needles ! i often faint from them...but im excited to think i may have a injection and start to feel better...its like the next stage...i WANT to go to the gym...MORE...i am really getting to the stage where i am loving the gym...and i hate not going...and i know that sounds bizarre cos im so not a gym person...but i feel good when i go i like the girls, i like knowing i got exercise in for the day, and i LOVE what its doing to my body. And once i get these iron levels sorted out you watch i am going to F***ING kick ass...i have been sitting here planning next weeks gym plan....this is what i am going to committ too...

monday - public holiday
tuesday - PT session - resistance training
wednesday - RPM
thursday - PT session - boxing
friday - 30 minutes on the cycle
saturday - RPM and i mite try body pump

That will be 5 workouts for the week and all but one is cardio ! Its amazing how im changing....i have NEVER been into the gym...im finding that amazing in myself...i am so glad i started to go to RPM i really think i am the type of the person who needs the structure of the classes...

Okies well its bloody freezing...i need to go have a shower to warm up my bod...have a good nite all
I am in shock at the moment. I have some friends dev and dayne who have been together ever since i have known them ( a couple of years now ) they had a committment ceremony a few years ago and never have i know a couple so suited. Anyway they ahve changed their status on facebook to single ! Theres been a trillion comments about it obviously everyone is thinking like me...but i am stunned...specially as they were at the pub on sunday and NOTHING would have made me think they are about to split up. STUNNED absolutely STUNNED. Even more stunned is i was watching biggest loser last nite talking to dayne in msn as i did...and she was fine...

I didnt make it to the gym last nite i missed my damn bus :( (which adelaide metro got a complaint email about the asses !) but maybe it was a blessing...cos i went home...was tucked up in bed by 9pm and altho still tired today i feel better then i have for a week or two. I will do my session tomorrow nite and then the RPM on saturday morning...then have a long talk with the doc on saturday afternoon.

I was in the shower last nite (ok no naughty stories here lol) but anyway i noticed my stomach on the sides is start to concave in...i was so excited hahahha omg how sad is that ? lol but it is very exciting to truly being to see and feel differences in my body.

When i was at mums the other day she minded me how for my mums hubbys 50the birthday (14 years ago) i lost weight and managed to weigh under 100 kilos...she then said...when he has his 65th bday/retirement party at the end of 2010 you should try and get back under 100 kilos...to which i educated her i plan to be under 100 kilos by this christmas...so thats a lil goal for by his birthday to be at goal (with a hawt chick on my arm of course !) Mite even if i do manage to do that....there is a outfit marina from L word wore that i adore mite even if i get down dig up a photo of it and get a dressmaker to whip it up for me ! I am busily searching on ebay...I am currently in my tops a size 22-24 so i wanna buy a really nice size 18 top that i can hang on my bedroom door and admire and work towards so thats how i will spend today .. oh and doing some work too ! lol okies off i go

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Tuesday (yes another boring heading lol)

Well i am still a very happy gal today after last nites weigh in. I am convinced at this point the exercise is playing a huge part for me. I weigh myself daily (yes bad i know but have for years so kinda understand my bodys fluctuations) anyway i am fiding the 24-36 hours after i do cardio the scales drop...so in other words...work my butt off and ill get the results ;) I did contemplate this week while sorting out with the docs whats going on to skip the gym but i feel that would be a backward step. Hopefully on saturday he will give me some kind of iron supplement. so i need to just get thru another 3 day after today...if he still doesnt cos he wants to run tests etc i may throw a lil tantrum ;)

Robyn messaged me last nite and said...i hadnt had a chance to tell u but me and jayne are together...we chatted a bit about it ... i told her im not bothered...as long as she is happy....i still think shes a great chick regardless and so glad we are friends. She then asked me about leigh n felicity...i told her im over it all and to be honest i prolly should thank them ... it was all that chit that made me throw myself into "me" and focus on my weight loss. I told robyn truly at this point i dont want a relationship...i know me damn well enough to know it would be a distraction....thats not to say if someone came along I would push them away....but I am certainly not gonna run around persuing anything. I would prefer to completely focus for this entire year and get under 100 and then in 12 months let my hawt body loose on the adelaide lesbian comunity !! hahahha !!!!

So today i have PT YAY funny how i actually look forward to the gym now...i LOVE LOVE LOVE how my life has a level of routine to it now. And i really look forward to the PT sessions (and it has NOTHING to do with the fact i will prolly see her HAWTness gabby training her clients tonite lol) I remember back when I was a kid and did ballet (when i was about 10) and i did ballet on tuesday nites and i always looked forward to it thruout the day...its kinda like that...that kid like joy. And as fiona said to me last week this is "you" time that 30 minutes is about me and me only...

Euphie thanks for your comments...i have read a bit up on the iron thing and what you said i read about the going to the loo stuff lol.

I do have a gurls nite this weekend...i am going altho i may not go out with everyone after dinner. I will see how I feel if im still buggered like i am now ill do dinner only if im feeling better ill go out after too.

I emailed tracy yesterday to see if i can borrow her "choose life" tshirt to wear to robyns bday party...so thats a go-er and she will bring it when i catch up with her and laura for morning tea during my week off work.

Okies i think i have rambled enuff and i am at work so should go do some...oh by the way...that 1.3 kilos takes it to 13.8 kilos in 10 weeks :)

Monday, March 02, 2009


Well woke feeling like a piece of crap AGAIN...i went to the docs and my doc wasnt there but i saw another one...the blood test results from saturday were back (how fast was that?) anyway your iron levels should be 12.1- 15.1 apparantly...mine was only 7 so thats not too good. I said should i eat mroe red meat etc he said dont take anything u need to see ur actual doctor and that combined with the liver results u may need more tests. So I have a appointment with my doc on saturday at 2pm. So i just need to get thru this week then hopefully they will do something cos i cant keep going feeling like this.

My jillian michaels book arrived today...YAY !! im happy about that OF COURSE

And for the weigh in result lol...i lost 1.3 kilos which i was happy with (altho maybe a lil disappointed lol i was hoping for closer to 2 kilos) so now this coming week i need 1.1 kilos to reach my 35 kilos since joining ww 2 years ago...and i am now officially the LIGHTEST i have been for 4-5 years. I lost 1.2 kilos and i will have my 3rd 5 kilos since rejoining ww in december and also my 10% since rejoining ww...so this coming week i will be working my sweet ass off !

Okies off I go....enjoy all

Sunday, March 01, 2009

Adelaide is too small a city...

...especially if your a lesbian ! Gawd damn....i was so looking forward to the pub today and having some time out without leigh and felicity. So anyway i got there....and i was so proud of ME...firstly...i drank one diet coke the whole time i was there =] not one drop of alcohol passed my lips. Then dev went and bought some potato crisps and offered then to me....then another girl (who i hadnt met before) bought a cheese platter...holy crap....but again i said no thanks....THEN they decided to get pizza ! I said no thanks...they rang and ordered it and i thought okay if i leave in 30 minutes time i should miss the pizza arriving...i was just saying to robyn im gonna go soon and i look up and who do i see? yep u betcha...leigh n felicity. And straight away robyn turns around to me and says are they togethe? im like...no....i dunno...maybe? lol then felicity came over gave me a hug...i asked her how she was then her and even tho robyn moved her chair over and said grab some chairs they went and sat on the brick wall behind us...i spoke to leigh for a few minutes...then about 20 minutes later stood up and said to them im going....to which leigh said..gee thanks we came to have a drink with you...im like...well yeh ive been here for 2 hours tho...i then said goodbye to the other gurlies (who figured out i was leavin to avoid the pizza) can u seriously believe how small adelaide is? While were all friends....im really not overly comfortable when its all 3 of us together...i feel felicity thinks i did the wrong thing...and to be perfectly honest i cant be bothered dealing with it and its easier for me to leave.

But that said i am wrapped with how i handled things in relation to the food ! OKies i be back after weigh in tomorrow nite.

Could I be starting to enjoy the gym....

Well woke this morning and my thighs are killing me ! LOL omg so damn sore...everytime i sit or bend over .... but they obviously got a good workout so i will take it as a good sign lol

Its strange....I get something out of the gym....not sure what....and so often when im there im watching that damn clock (well except during my PT sessions) but there is something very motivating about being around fit and healthy and happy people. I am even tempted to go in before work this week. (I start work at 9am this week !) I will set my alarm for 6am in the morning and see how i feel...but its definitely a thought there (fiona my personal trainer would prolly die of shock if i turned up so earlycos when we make appoints im always like,,,,,nothing before 9am please LOL)

This arvo going out to the wheaty, about 4 of my friends are going but there about another 4 or 5 girls i havent met before who are going as well...and its times like this i'd like a chamagne or two but as i said the other day time to "suck it up princess" and only diet coke today....plus i have weigh in tomorrow and i dont want anything affecting it adversely. So today is the first time dayne, dev and robyn will have seen me since january 2....i have spoken to dayne and she has seen my pics i uploaded and she said ive done well in such a short time so will be interesting to see their responses when they see me LOL

Okies i will be back afterweigh in tomorrow with the results - have a good day all !