Well...weighed in this morning and I am now 134.8 kilos ! I lost 1.8 kilos this week...so my total loss is 36.1 kilos. I am wrapped for the last 12 months or more i have sat anywhere from 138 kilos up to 151 kilos...so i have now nailed that voodoo...i know as long as i count my points and do my exercise i will lose...EASY sure i may not lose big everyweek and i may even hit a plateau in the future but we will face that challenge.
I think my thinking has just completely changed. I watched biggest loser the other nite...and there is this girl whose there with her mum...her mum left her dad when she was young and she didnt see her mum much and part of the reason for them doing this is to try n repair her relationship with her mum...anyway jillian pretty much said to her ... u need to stop focusing on ur mum u cant control her u can only control you. I never truly understand the whole "women put others before themselves" i always thats only for women who are married with families etc...but i think back to a lot of my actions i realise im the same. I'll give a simplistic example...if i am playing someone in gammon who has been going thru a losing streak...i am more then happy to lose...cos i know i can handle losing...but if they been bitching and whining about it maybe they cant? I've also been thinking about how I always take the easy way out...when i was a teen...i attempted year 12 twice...not once did i even finish the year...it got a bit hard so i quit. And thats continued in my adult life...with pretty much anything thats a lil bit hard...whether it was learning to drive....or whatever its just been easier to quit. I never thought i'd be a gymer...mever thought I would be good in the gym...the fact i am good at the gym is shocking in itself but making me realise i CAN do this...in reality i CAN get my licence if i worked at it and didnt give up...i could even complete my schooling... i CAN do all those things just like i CAN get under 100 kilos !