Friday, May 27, 2011

Today is my last day at work before my long service leave! My computer died last weekend so over the next 2 weeks i doubt there will be many updates.

Life is going pretty dandy tho. The girl i met i am still seeign quite regularly...i told her i like her and shes told me that she wants to keep spending time with me and getting to know me...that she gets into relationships slowly...which all works for me! And in fact she is planning to join my gym next week. So in relation to her i am in a very happy place :)

I have knucked down more this week with food and exercise. Last saturday morning i was 94.9 kilos...yesterday morning 92.9 all good :) And back into the exercise rather well this week too. Fiona set me "homework" this week....70 flights of stairs....which i completed over 2 days. And i also have to do 30 minutes on the rower...which will be blooming interesting since i have never done more then about 9-10 minutes on it

But everything in life is going pretty nicely...i dont work again till sept 19 after im ready for lots of workouts and lots of relaxation catching up with friends

Thursday, May 26, 2011

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Wednesday, May 25, 2011


okay people....thanks to the lovely "to band or not to band" i was nominated for a free blog design makeover which i wanna win :) so anyone who loves me (and even those who dont!) if you have a spare minute and could vote for me if you can send a email to and just put "12" in the subject line that will get me your vote - thanks in advance!!!!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Where I Am At...

It seems like ages since i have written a post i have really become a slack blogger of late....and the crazy thing is its not from a lack of things to write about ... just damn lazyness ;)

As to weight loss (this is a weightloss blog after all) its been pretty non existant over the last 6 weeks. Things were going along quite swimmingly till easter....I hadnt seen my mum in months (january so it had been about 3 months) we met up for lunch. My relationship with my mum is disjointed to say the least...she never rings (neither do i but thats cos whenever i do she never has more then a minute or two to talk to me so i stopped bothering) i meet her for lunch...she says "your sister was in port lincoln on the weekend" im like...i know she told me....mum then goes on to say (keeping in mind i live alone and the last time she called me was in 2010 some time) i tried to ring your sister on friday and when she didnt answer on sunday i got worried...she then goes on to say....cos you never know anything could have happened to them and i would never know. I was so tempted to point out hello i live alone and if i fell or anything you would never know either...but eh no matter. So anyway following that lunch i went on a 4 day binge :( and since then i have really struggled to get back on track....ill go a few days okay...then ill get weak and cave in to kfc or some yummy pasta or something. Ive seen her over the last 6 weeks about 4 times. Mothers day i actually went and bought her flowers (havent bought her a mothers day/xmas or birthday present since the HUGE fight we had a couple of years ago) which i know sounds awful....but if she cant support me at least occassionally my view has been why should she want material possessions from me (man i must sound like a bitch! lol) but anyway for a few months prior to easter i had started to wonder if it was time to let the hatchet down a bit....and make more of a effort. So i called her said what are you doing for mothers day...she said come out to dinner with us...i bought her flowers...and that ONE day things went good (wonder if it was the flowers?????) anyway yeh things were good that day but the relationship as a whole was still disjointed...anyway my sister was down last weekend. As i was leaving on the sunday mums hubby got some wine glasses out they had picked up for me from a garage sale...he unwraps one and talking to me like im a child tells me "oh you only fill them up this much" im like...i know how to pour a glass of which his response was "okay pisshead" my mum just sat there....and i walked out. This week has been pretty disastrous again with the food. (lets talk kfc, carbonara, violet crumbles....need i go on?) I had tried to figure out in my head what was going on...and initially i thought....oh ive become complacent as im "okay" at this weight (and to a degree thats prolly true) ... ive also kinda thought....that maybe im at that point (and im talking mainly exercise here) where i cant improve anymore.... to me i wasnt or havent been seeing improvements in things ive been doing (but following a chat with fiona this morning she disagrees and apparantly my perception might be off track ;)) And the thing is when i think to those couple of remarks said by mum and her hubby....they were hurtful....i mean ... i know and accept my relationship with my mum will never be good.It will prolly be acceptable....but im the black sheep...the gay one...the one who got to 170 kilos....the one who is single....blah blah blah.... and thats fine but i guess for me....i need to just really acknowledge those things do hurt and whilst i cant control how she acts....she will do what she wants and they are really only going to have a impact on me if i let them. Her decisions for how she acts and whether she does or doesnt support me...theyre her actions to live with....but i think more then ever its just maybe me realise so much that my contact with her needs to be limited as it was before....i cant afford for this emotional stuff between us to keep affecting my life (prolly long after she has even forgotten what has occurred) At this stage im pretty sure my sister isnt down until i have a few months where i can easily avoid her and as horrible as that sounds im gonna be a bit selfish and avoid her and focus back on me.

The scales this morning said 94.9 kilos ( said bloomin 92 kilos thursday morning) so i think this week i will just skip weigh in and just focus on getting a half decent loss on the board for the following week.

As to the gym and exercise....well its still there lol i was a slack ass today and didnt do pump or balance as i would normally do on a saturday. But i need to refocus....ive got thru today within my happy with that. My heart rate monitor is also working again so more then happy with that news :) Fiona has actually set me homework for the week! lawdie! lol so i have to climb 10 lots of stairs (70 flights thruout the week) plus do a 30 minute stint on the rower .... rowing thats gonna make for a interesting week!

Onto other stuff.....i did go out with me new "friend" on wednesday nite....we went to the movies....saw water for elephants. Was a real good movie and a real nice the end of the night....she went to give me a kiss...i wasnt really sure if it was meant for my lips or cheek so i turned my face so it landed on my time ill just bite the bullet and let her plant one on the lips lol. And yes im quite sure there will be a next time...but prolly a few weeks away...shes a busy woman with a demanding job and she is doing a masters at uni which she has the last few weeks of the current im sure in a few weeks we will catch up again....who would ever have thought id go on a date lil own two dates! Its a nice feeling i must admit to think she may be attracted to me and want to spend time with me.

I have only 5 working days left till my long service leave ill be one happy girl when 4pm on friday comes ;)

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

How I calorie count...

I have had someone ask some questions about calorie counting and sites etc i use so thought id do a post on it.

Firstly in relation to counting firstly need to work out home many calories to eat....this can be a bit of trial and error. There are plenty of sites around that have calorie calculators on them, one you can try is Daily Plate. The problem I found with these sites is that they highly over inflate the calories you need. But they are a pretty good starting point. Pop your details in and use whatever calories they give you as a guide....stick to it for 2-3 weeks and then reevaluate...if your not losing what you hoped try reducing by 100 or 150 calories per week till you find your sweet spot.

But if you want to do a calculation more specific to yourself i do have the calculation for that too! your calculators out and ready for this?

So the first thing you need to work out is your BMR....the calculation in metric is:

BMR = 655 + (9.6 X weight in kilos) + (1.8 X height in cm) - (4.7 X age in years).

Once you have worked that out you need to work out your activity level for your job....

Sedentary - little or no exercise
Calorie-Calculation = BMR X 1.2
Lightly Active (light exercise/sports 1-3 days/week)
Calorie-Calculation = BMR X 1.375
Moderately Active (mod exercise/sports 3-5 days/week)
Calorie-Calculation = BMR X 1.55
Very Active = BMR X 1.725 (hard exercise 6-7 days/week)
Calorie-Calculation = BMR X 1.725
Extra Active (very hard daily exercise/sports & physical job)
Calorie-Calculation = BMR X 1.9

So you multiply your BMR by the relevant activity a office worker and sit on my ass most of the i actually only multiply mine by 1.1

Next is to work out your calories burnt. I work out my calories burnt over a week and then divide it by 7 to get a daily average (so for me its like about 400 calories per day) take your BMR multiply it by the activity level then add your average daily calorie burn. So you now have a (approximate) guide fo how many calories you burn on average per day. If you want to work it out without a HRM heres a site now we know how much we burn....we know to lose weight we need to eat less then we burn. To lose 1 kilo per week we have to eat 7000 calories less then we lost 500 grams per week we need to eat 3500 calories less then we burn. Soooooo you take the figure you got at the end of the previous calculations and multiply by 7 to get your weekly then minus 7000 calories (for a kilo loss per week) and then divide by 7.....and TA-DA you have got your magical number!!

Now next my recommendation (and what works best for me) is to do what i call calorie do a couple of days slightly higher then you "magical" number (i do 3).....a few days lower then your magical number (i do 4) and that way your body is eating different calorie amounts each day hopefully avoiding a plateau...i also find it leads me to eat different foods each day. For a idea on how i work my calorie cycling (and this aveerages out to 1415 calories per day) i eat:

monday : 1200
tuesday : 1300 (weigh in day)
wednesday : 1200
thursday : 1600
friday : 1200
saturday : 1800
sunday : 1500

Now for websites to track your calories if looking for a free site id recommend (be aware i have found some errors with a couple of food items on there site) and if your happy enough to pay id recommend I use the biggest loser club,.....i like the visuals it gives u specially for keeping a eye on macronutrients.

If you want more info on calorie counting id recommend this forum : It is a US site but I found it very informative in the beginning.

So thats how I do my calorie counting....hope I didnt lose too many of you with the calculations but if i did remember go to a site like daily plate and use their calculation and go from there.....any questions feel free to leave a comment and ill do the best to answer it BASED ON MY EXPERIENCE

Also if you want to know healthy ways to increase your calories in a healthy way on high calorie days...I add a extra weetbix at breakfast...add a slice of cheese at lunch and might have a roll instead of a sandwich....its really not that hard to add extra "healthy" calories

Pics from the Foxy Dinner

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Ive been missing in action eh??? Actually i went to post last nite but blogger was being a ass and down.

I have really had a successful week this week....ive curbed the diet back quite a still drinking my diet coke but my food has been much better. I had 5 days off work and i have been to the gym 5 days (normally i go 4 times a week)...i even made a 7am class yesterday on a day off! So my week looked like this:

mon - body combat + PT
tues - nothing
wednesday - body pump + body balance
thursday - PT
friday - body combat
saturday - PT + body pump + body balance

Not too shabby a effort if i do say so myself! Then friday i went clothes shopping! Who woulda ever thought clothes shopping could be fun?? So i have the foxy dinner to go to wearing my skinny jeans...and i bought this really pretty red + black top...i then bought a "corporal jacket" which is a short fitted jacket...and then last night i picked up my layby of my knee high high heeled boots! Man i am gonna look tall tonite!! So i am pretty sure by the time i run a brush thru my hair ;) and put on a lil bit of makeup ill be passable...and of course i will take a pic before i go out.

I also bought some new scales....omg im so freaking inlove with these things! Being the girl who scrutinizes everything and loving numbers etc...these scales weigh me, body fat %, water content %, muscle % (30.1%!!), BMI and your BMR. I loveeeeeeeeeeeee them!! Its gonna give me a much better all over picture of whats going on inside me...especially when i fluctuate or have a gain.

I also on friday renewed my contract at the gym and signed up for X-fit,,,,6 weeks of torture i mean exercises ;)

Yesterday i gymmed it....did PT first (21 flights of stairs thank you very much!!!)...then body pump and then body balance...i really notice once i am back into a few of the body balance classes that i really start to improve with the balance tracks. I then went home...went past a lil shop on the way home called "factorie" such cute tops...anyway bought a hoodie...its a firm fit....but great colours so will hopefully last me all of winter. Then last nite went to the dinner for the end of the foxy challenge...yummy dinner....i had angel hair pasta with crushed pine nuts, parmassan cheese, olive oil...and not a huge bowl which was good...just the right amount for me. They gave out some awards too for the challenge...i won the blue team award which means i won 3 PT i dont do enuff of them!! hehe but yes very happy with that....and how bizarre me winning anything....its all a new concept! Martine came along with me and it was great to catch up with her :)

Today i woke feeling like i have a damn hangover! LOL not sure what with that (especially as i drank more water yesterday then i have in ages!) Today im hanging around home and then this arvo going to mums to see my sister and the kids....mums having pizza for dinner tonite....ugh....i thought about taking my own food but if im not gonna eat some pizza when its right in front of me!!! So will make sure they get at least one thin crust pizza....

Below is a pic from last nite

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Moving On...

Yesterday i went to the gym....i did body pump and then did body balance....then towards the end of the class...i started to have visions of me and a meat pie :( Couldnt get it out of my brain. I was gonna go have the time i got to my locker tho i knew that wasnt gonna happen...gave myself a good talking too and stayed on 1200 calories for the day. Then last nite i was watching that new aussie show "Big" was so motivating! The guy when he started reminded me of relationships...hid in the house...didnt like dealing with people especially groups of people. Im better with that these days,,,that was one thing that struck me when i met Jo and her friends...i felt comfortable and while i was definitely quieter then Jo i also definitely talked :) It was a great reminder of where i DON'T want to go too.

Today i have PT then im gonna try and do 30 minutes of 3 minutes running and 1 minute walking...apparantly i have issues when it comes to running for 3 minutes im doing it at a much slower speed...its still hard for me but its doable. My breathing just really sucks when it comes to running. Tomorrow morning 7am body combat class! (oh thats gonna be hard being at the gym at 7am!) then some more running...then Ill see Amy to be weighed in...I sense a small gain coming my way (jumped on the scales yesterday and it showed a 800 gram gain...hopefuly tomorrow it wont be SO bad) Then afterwards im going to get my eyebrows waxed...mite go to the heart shop to get them to look at my HRM...and then its clothes shopping. I need to find something to wear for saturday nite for the gym awards dinner "thing" lol Ive got my knee high boots on layby which ill pick up tomorrow....a dress or skirt that would go with them would work perfectly. It would be really nice to be able to go out wearing something i feel good in....the biggest problem being im kinda a "inbetween" size....i have issues with shopping at the plus size stores...i simply DONT WANT TOO...i know if i went to places like city chic...i would prolly fit in there small to medium sizing...but damn its a plus size store ;) and whilst especially on top i can fit into size 16's on the bottom half im still a size 18...prolly a size 20 at times.

I need to start focussing more on how GOOD it will feel to hit that 76 kilo mark. I know its still a while away (18-19 kilos) but ive always "visualised" with my weight loss and that has helped to motivate me...but ive never really thought to much about "76 kilos" its a distant number...that doesnt seem to be the number for me....ive kinda settled in at 94-95 kilos like a comfy double digits...but far from slim but im kinda "okay" hre...BUT i dont wanna be KINDA okay...i wanna be healthy and one of those people in the healthy weight zone. And so with that said it really is time to knuckle down with the diet. I have been drinking diet coke but im not too fussed about that at this STAGE. I just need to be getting my protein up...staying with in my calories....eating lots of fruit and vegies and going from there. I think i would like to set the goal by the end of june to be under 90 kilos...thats 6 weeks...thats completely doable...especially as in another 2 weeks ill be off work and can do all my plans for my gym classes and really knuckle down.

Oh i did something yesterday that really caught me off guard! LOL I saw on the arm of my sofa...didnt really think too much of it....was there a few minutes then was like holy hell...look at concern im gonna break it LOL....thats a first!!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011


I have come to the conclusion that i have just become darn complacent over this whole weight loss jig! The last month i have gone fluctuated by about 2-3 kilos. I know some of the bad eating has been related to some stresses I prolly bring on myself with a certain relationship. Must admit im bothered that i have become complacent! I mean I am still exercising....but i suspect i am eating how I should be at maintenance. I had great plans to start counting calories again this week....but when it came to doing it i was like...blah....cant be stuffed (cos its such a damn effort *insert incredibly sarcastic tone*). Some of my tools have broken of heart rate monitor has decided to die....cannot get a heart rate at all on the damn thing :( so i really have NO idea how hard i am working and what calories i am burning. My scales broke over the i have lost a level of accountability there too. Im seriously tired of chicken and roast vegies for dinner! BLAH shoot me now!!! I also wonder why i have become complacent...i wonder if its cos i am now under 100 kilos...that mark doctors thought i would never see...or maybe its cos a cute girl has looked my way (this was always a fear for a long time....that dating or meeting girls would lead me to be distracted)

I was gonna wait till i get my bonus in june to organise another heart rate monitor....i *think* the issue is the strap and so think maybe i should just go and buy another strap and see what happens. I should also prolly invest in some new scales. But will just getting my "tools" working again magically get me back in the right head space. Not that i think my headspace is awful at the moment...but its annoying me.....My 4 months of work starts in 2.5 weeks....the whole aim of these holidays was to get to dedicate 3-4 months solely to me....but the holidays havent even started and my head isnt in the game UGH. I remember Nat who lost about 60 kilos....and then she struggled and i remember her saying afterwards her friend (who was a psychologist from memory) said....whats wrong with maintaining for a while after losing 60 kilos....and in the back of my mind i keep hearing that...but at the same time i know i NEED to get to goal weight....i dont doubt for a second if i dont get down to at least 76 kilos i will eventually put the weight back on. I know people say no your a different person know...but deep down im still the same...just a few less fat layers....i still could go eat a feast at KFC....i still could turn into a sloth sitting on the couch every nite with some chocolate. Its one of those times where i wish things could just "click" in to place again....its happened before and hopefully as before it does click in again and hopefully it happens in the next 2 weeks......cos lets face it...its kinda pointless busting my ass at the gym if im not eating perfectly.

Then again maybe its that im at a point where i am okay with how i look....i certainly (in my eyes need to lose more...and in my eyes i look like i need to lose 25-30 kilos) especially around my hips/thighs/stomach...but at the same time i know i look "okay" not fab...not good....but passable....and when i dress up to go out i dont feel like the huge blimp i once felt like.

Then again maybe its time to just get back to the tracking and busting my ass at the questioning it...

Saturday, May 07, 2011

No Excuses....Time to refocus...

So the foxy challenge for the gym officially finished for me today. Over the 12 weeks i lost 8.1 body fat dropped by 2.1% (i think!). I finally finished my diary and handed it in (i was like a kid with a school assignment i had put off and off) Im pretty happy with the results...i always say i never complete things...but i actually completed this. so wooo hooo for me :) Anyway its done and dusted...only the foxy dinner next saturday nite and then its fully completed.

Over the last few weeks tho i really havent done as good as i could be doing. After my binge just before easter....i got back on track but not like normal. Ive been drinking diet coke, been having chocolate daily and today was the first day i have done any classes at the gym for nearly two weeks!!! I am sore currently from thursday nites session....and im pretty sore all over (see what a mean trainer i have!) The sides of my rib cages ache, my shoulders ache, my outer lower thighs ache,,,,my abs ache...get the picture? lol So today I did PT....and did manage to row 1km in 4 minutes 15.08 seconds....far from the fastest in the gym (they are having a lil contest at the moment) but still a improvement on my previous time. Fiona then had me run 3 minutes at 8.5 on the treadmill...i dieddddddddddddddddddd i swear im not for this running!!! My breathing sucks during it. But she wants me to practice at slow honestly i will ;) I then went and did body pump and then body balance. Because i was sore already pump was agony lol and since it had been weeks i used small weights lol but body balance while i sucked i realised i had really missed that class! So after several weeks of not really being focussed its time to get refocused!!! This week i am only working monday and tuesday so NO excuse for not gyming heres this weeks plan:

sun - 4.5 km walk
monday - combat + PT
tuesday - day off
wednesday - body pump + body balance
thursday - body Pump (yes i know i shouldnt do it two days running - but ill go real heavy wednesday and light on thursday) + PT + combat + body balance
friday - body combat
saturday - PT + body pump + body balance

No excuses...and of course i am gonna go back to counting calories...but more so then counting calories i wanna start to focus on more for eating for performance (something i may need to research a lil bit) but there has been way to much white bread, chocolates (yum!) and diet coke sneak back into my diet over the last few weeks. So this morning i was 94.8 next sunday i wanna me 92.5 or lower...over 2 kilos but i am pretty sure if i knuckle down i can do it. Plus no excuses i have plenty of time this week!! I only have 18 kilos to reality i could be at goal within 5 months .... my problem is a cute gal smiles at me and i lose all focus! lol but enuff is enuff....gotta get this done once and for all!

I also need to focus more on trying to succeed what i mean is...i do okay with different things...but when it comes to exceeding that belief isnt my head im always the girl that comes thats something i need to work in...and maybe push myself more to realise maybe occassionally i could come first ;)

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

So the girl who i met for a drink last friday nite mentioned on that nite going out on our own for dinner and a movie. So this morning I texted her and said do you wanna do that this weekend? She replied...she would love too but she is off to geelong this weekend for her mums 60th so we would need to do it the following have replied back and told her i have plans the saturday nite but the friday nite would appears the weekend after this one i may have a "date" Im not putting any expectations on this except maybe i will make a new friend out of this...(cos i could always do with more!) but i am interested so we will see what happens. I have that day off work too so that kinda works out well But the truth of the matter is even if it doesnt work out....this getting out there stuff has helped me. The last time i met someone and they showed interest was when i was about 135 kilos about 6-7 years ago just after i split with Ang. I thought at the time this girl....apart from being a tad stalkerish lol was just a tad crazy... why on earth would someone like me once they had SEEN me. I dont believe i have a attractive face (altho these days i am liking it better) to the point i hate even looking in the fat...i have/had a body completely out of proportion. But yanno when i got dressed for last friday nite...i knew i looked pretty good (the wonders of makeup) and whilst im not slim im not huge....and there was someone who seemed attentative to me and appears to have not been replused by its a learning experience...just gotta drill it into my brain now.

Last nite fiona wanted me to do intervals so i ran for a total of 12 minutes...I managed 10 minutes of running interspersed with 6 minutes of walking before i died and told her i gave up! lol I really dont have the cardio fitness for this running thing...and i can handle sweating...i can handle having to move my legs fast but that whole puffing trying to catch my breath stuff is for the birds!!! LOL Completely dislike it and really dont think i can ever build my stamina/fitness up to that. But the running thing is still a goal....really what i want is to be able to run...i just am not so keen on putting in the work to be able to run ;) LOL

Weighed in tonite....lost 1.1 down to 94.4 kilos...18.4 kilos to amazing is that? Amy (my food coach) also commented how for my weight my body fat is really quite low. So BONUS

So things are happening...maybe some of those goals of a social life....and maybe even a partner arent just pipe dreams that will never happpen...maybe there is a possibility of having what I really want :)

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Progress Pics

Lots happening lately!!! I met a girl of the pink sofa on friday nite for a few drinks at the wheaty....all went really well :) and we are planning to go out by ourselves to a movie and dinner at some stage ;)

I also went shopping today....bought 2 pairs of size 18 jeans from the NORMAL section at target...and they fit perfectly!!!! Also tries on some zip up knee high boots and they did up over my calves so very impressed! (i lay-byed them) and to celebrate heres a pic taken today at 94.6 kilos (76.3 kilos lost) in one of the new pairs of jeans!!