Sunday, July 31, 2011


Well today has been a disaster lol. The worse thing i have done recently is cut back on carbs for 4 days of the week like i did last week. I ate way too many cookies early in the i splurged on fish n chips. This morning i was up to 88.2 kilos...after the fish and chips i suspect i will be 91 kilos in the morning. Not sure if i will weigh in this week...i know ive gained i also know how to get back on track. Really the last 6 weeks or so have been a waste weight loss wise. My sleeping pattern has been all over the place...i think maybe i have been sleeping too much (12 hours last nite need i say more!!!) So i think for the rest of my holidays ill set my alarm for 8am. Its not absurbly early...and also make more of a effort to actually get up when i wake....not roll over and go back to sleep. I think also the gym needs to be attended to this week im going to try and attend lunch time and evening classes....

m - 45 mins cardio + PT + combat + jam
t - step + pump
w - pump + body balance
t - step + PT
f - body pump + abs class + 45 mins cardio
s - PT + 45 mins cardio + body balance

The crazy thing is after going to the gym yesterday doing PT a hour of cardio and body balance i felt so good last nite. I dont feel good when im skipping the gym....quite the opposite...i just feel completely unproductive and like im not focused. And i will really feel like the biggest hypocrite going out next saturday nite to celebrate my 5 years of healthy living if i cant even stick to my gym routine for 6 days. So back to eating 1628 calories per day....getting my sleep back to 8 hours a day....attending to the above plan as a MINIMUM....and also back taking my multivitamin pills...i stopped taking them and that prolly hasnt helped, altho im really starting to think now maybe too much sleep and not enough activity has been the problem and of course also focus on the water (even tho the chocolate and coke thing finishes at midnight tonite!!! YAY) but im gonna need to flush out the sodium from my system. The crazy thing is too...the fish n chips didnt even taste good....and the bbq chips i had were just dry tasting.

Yanno i did think about not posting about this...but truthfully...i think its important that people who read this journal get that im not perfect....i know people find my journey inspiring....and im grateful that what im doing may help others get the life they want....but i also think its good to realise none of us are perfect...and i think sometimes people have a perception i am perfect at this weight loss game...but im just stubborn and luckily have never fully given up...nor will no matter what slip ups we have they are only slip ups not failures we can all get back on track and continue on with what we started. I still dont have the life i want....there are still parts of the old me that continually pop up...we are all a work in progress!

I also have seen one other dress that i may get for dinner next weekend....going to try it on after the gym tomorrow...if not im then going to have to decide between the blue and black and white print idea which ill wear....the blue one is really too short....the black and white one is nice but i dont "love" it....i actually really like the blue one but the length worries me....also mite get my hair recoloured this week...will wait and see....

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Short and Long term goals...

My goals have mostly always been "weight loss" in a number on the view on this is changing lately....and im sure even once i meet my current goals i will come up with new ones (running is always going to be a eventual goal...maybe a elusive goal...its not something im focused on at the moment but in time) but im definitely one of these people who need goals otherwise i end up wandering around the gym aimlessly thinking what the hell am i doing LOL....

This is a mixture of short and long term goals...

To be under 80 kilos by xmas...and under 75 kilos by next june - initially aimed to be at 85.8 kilos by tomorrow! LOL Im 3 kilos off that. After not having many carbs then going back to normal level of carbs the scales have jumped up 1.5 kilos...sighs! I think to lose 8.5 kilos over the next 5 months is doable. That works out to about 1.7 kilos per month and on average 400-500 grams per week...which is doable. Im not concerned these days with losing large fact i think losing the last 15 kilos a lil slower and building muscle is not a bad thing. And of course then 5 kilos in the first 6 months of next year is COMPLETELY doable. Thats under a kilo per week. I really wanna set attainable goals...cos getting to the 31st july and not reaching my goal of 85.5 kilos (and being quite the way of it) is a lil bit demoralising.

To be able to do proper burpees and pushups - pushups have been a goal of mine for what feels like a life time LOL....but it was something pretty early in my gym days that i set as a goal. I can do them on my toes...but i lower myself all of like half a centimetre....i wanna eventually be able to go very low. The burpees is one that has come up recently in my mind...i think if i could manage 10 of them with GOOD form would really be indicative of me having really progressed. I cant even do one properly....but to me its really kind of a sign of where my physical abilities are at if i can do burpees.

To complete a 30 flight stair climb in under 10 minutes in October - i dont really know how doable this is under 10 minutes! LOL But im slowly working on it but i guess in another 2-4 weeks we will ramp up the training for that a lil more.

To start studying towards being a personal trainer - this is a long term goal....i really dont want to do it till i am at goal. I am the type of person who needs to focus on one thing at a time. And i may never use it but i would certainly like to complete the studies.

To be a size 14 jeans - to me this is kinda like "goal"....i dont expect jean/pant size ill ever be able to get into size 12's im hippy and will always be....and i think i will always be a size larger on my bottom half.

To go swimming regularly - i have wanted to do this over the last few years....but i put it off every year! lol even tho i know now i wouldnt be the biggest in the main issue in all honesty is getting in and out of the pool...i am paranoid of slipping on the quite obviously wet steps for getting in and out...never know maybe this year....or at the very least maybe ill venture down to the beach a few times (no steps there and i did go to the beach several times last year while at streaky)

I gymmed it today and feel so good for doing it! We did weights (traditional weights stuff which we havent done for quite a while...i suspect some sore muscles tomorrow!!!!) then did 30 minutes on the bike (rode 13.91 kms), then 15 minutes on the xtrainer and then a 60 minute body balance class. I really enjoy body balance....after doing pilates the other day and being bored out of my brain....doing balance and not even looking at the clock till 45 minutes into it was great! And i feel much better....i know it doesnt necessarily boost weight loss...but i think its good for my body. :)

Friday, July 29, 2011


I was messaged this morning with a friend asking how they get their motivation thought theres a post in the making :)

So one thing that has worked for me is to "enjoy" the journey. Ive mentioned before...back in 2009 i plateaud out at 130 kilos for about 7 months. I felt i was eating correctly...i was training with fiona 3 times a week...but still i was doing this lil fluctuation of a kilo or two and never getting under 130 kilos and maintaining it. At the time i was unable to settle on a eating plan going from ww to calorie counting to slim at the gym....i think i even tried lite n easy...but nothing was working. Then in mid 2009...i knew i was missing "something" not be losing i knew something wasnt right....and thats when i started to read up on nutrition and exercise. I didnt know what i was looking for but decided if i became more educated....maybe i would figure out what i needed to change. And by doing that i decided i was going to view my journey as my "hobby" not just a task that simply needed to be done...but it was gonna be my "passion". Pretty much straight away i signed up for google alerts....and any email newsletters on a healthy lifestyle i signed up for. I kept my eye out for groups and pages on facebook that fitted into this criteria. Ultimately this process didnt suddenly get the weight loss going (that happened when i read Jillians book and discoverred "calorie cycling") but reading stuff on nutrition....i actually discoverred that i really had a genuine interest in nutrition and a healthy lifestyle.

Something i wish i had figured out long ago in my journey was just to be happy with where im at. Yanno I would be at the point where I had lost 30, 40 or 50 kilos or more....but instead of celebrating that i would be always like "i hate how fat i am"...."i hate my hips" etc etc yes i am a lot smaller i see myself as i really am? Yeh prolly not...i still think i look rather big...(and i just think maybe thats a mental thing...and one day my brain will catchup i hope) and while its hard even know to acknowledge that im doing good...cos if im doing good i mite even have to suggest im successful at this....and being mediocre etc is getting off track....celebrate whatever losses you have had....whether your 200 grams down or 100 kilos down....your still better off then you were yesterday and tomorrow you will be better off then you are today if you stick at it.

Variety - focus on a variety of foods! I even dont think having the occassional "bad" food as a bad thing. If you are on track and eating well and then on a special occassion go out....and dont go nuts but also dont necessarily stick to your calories....but eat a meal you thoroughly enjoy....which is different to what you normally eat...i think your body thanks you. Its good for you spent that occassion....that hour or two....not having to think about calories or have shocked your body and it will be thinking what on earth is this i am digesting....and it falls into why calorie cycling works...the key is to ensure you get back on to track and certainly dont do it every week....but for special occassions i dont see the harm in it. I am going out for dinner next weekend (to celebrate my 5 years of healthy living) and i plan to have whatever main meal takes my fancy and possibly even a glass of wine....yanno it wont kill me....and it wont lead to a 2 kilo fact i suspect it will be good for my weight loss journey. Also on a day to day basis dont eat the same thing every a variety of healthy foods....the occassional treat food that fits into your calories/points....and dont guilt it! Enjoy that moment!!!

I would also really suggest you try and read inspirational stories. There are a trillion journals out a batch of my blog list on the side of the journal....go to google and search "weight loss journals"....find some books ("fat chance", "believe it, be it" "confessions of a reformed dieter")

Mostly find the joy in this can be joyful....from the very first week....yes it can also be frustrating and hard work....but switching your mindset to enjoy it....will lead to success....viewing it as a chore you "have to do" i dont believe will lead to success.

Thursday, July 28, 2011


Im tired....tried getting my sleep pattern on track and with not eating many carbs last week think it has all caught up with me. Im sitting here...and barely able to keep my eyes open...a very early night tonite i think.

Gymmed it today...did PT and well i was kinda pathetic ;) was suppose to row 1500 metres...and twice during it i just stopped (not something i would normally do) was weird....wasnt like i was thinking "oh im too tired" and contemplated stopping...i just stopped....and not once but twice! Kinda annoyed with myself after...important lesson i have to eat for weight loss and for maintaining my exercise.

I then did a pilates class *yawn* omg the most boring class...a couple of exercises i could see would be good for me....but majority of the time i was bored and just watching the clock VERY slowly tick....ive never been like that will stick with my body balance which i enjoy (even the dreaded yoga track) much more. Tomorrow i am going to sleep in....going to go to bed by 10.30pm and no alarm clock just wake when i do. Tomorrow lunchtime i am planning to do pump and tomorrow nite going to cafe palazzo for dinner, already sussed out the menu....spinach and ricotta canneloni seems the go-er!

Yesterday morning i had gained 1.5 kilos :( this morning i was down 400 still up by 1.1 kilos....the funny thing tho its only stressing me cos i have to front up to Amy on tuesday lol for weigh in. The fact of the matter is a 500 gram or a 1 kilo gain is not the end of the world these days....its not like when you lose your first 5 kilos...if you gain a kilo then its so hard because its such a chunk of what you have lost but at this kinda happy with where i am (but not where i wanna end up) so its not like a kilo gain and im 170 kilos again...its a kilo gain....i took it off once...i can take it off again....not the end of the world :)

Not much else going on....yiros nite here!! lol Have a good nite all!!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Good day :)

Well i have had a real good day today :) I knew trying to go to sleep early last nite would lead to me having a crappy sleep....just before 1am i was still awake....anyway the alarm went off at 10 to 6 and it was just way to early for i set it for 6.50am and i DID get up then :) YAY Went to the gym....did 3 lots of stairs (7 flights per "lot") walking up the first flight then jogging up the next two etc...the last 2 lots of stairs (again 7 flights per "lot") i walked up. Then i went on the xtrainer...1 minute @ level 10, 1 minute @ level 5, another minute @ level 5 ensuring the RPMs were over 80...then 2 minutes on the versaclimber for 2 minutes....i did that whole combination 3 times...then i did 10 minutes on the treadmill at a speed of 6.2 (thats fast for me lol) without holding on...then did 5 minutes of practicing my fitball exercise. Then went and had morning tea with Laura....i had bruschetta while there but worked it all into my calories so was all good :)

This morning after the gym i popped into JeansWest and was trying on a dress ..... anyway the shop attendent says do you wanna try on a long maxi like yeh....and the girl turns around and says "size 12?" lol...i nearly had a heart attack! i know its a maxi dress so thats why i can fit in the smaller sizes...cos i sure as heck dont look like a size 12!!!!

I went to the doctor this arvo...he didnt wanna muck around getting blood tests to check my hormone levels *rolls eyes* ultimately tho he did the paperwork for my insulin to be tested....if thats changed dramatically (last time my glucose was 3.9) ill insist they test the hormones.

Do you ever wonder whats your "style"....ive always worn....whatever i could wear because most hasnt fitted. I know im not a huge girlie ill never be getting my nails etc done but hmmmm i guess people see me as the jeans and tshirt person cos thats what ive always lived a adult....but truth of the matter when i was a teenager while i definitely wore jeans and t's at times....i actually wore dresses and skirts a lot. And i actually like dresses...soft flowy dresses...but seems people dont think thats "me" lol...weird....maybe i dont even know what "me" is or my style!

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Uh oh.....carb fest.....

I think maybe last week i cut my calories too low...whilst the loss was great....ive been on a lil carb fest tonite :( and really dread the scales over the next few days. But thinking about means i just need to accept the losses from here on are going to be going to put my calories back to 1500....which if you do the mathematics of it all...if i burn just 200 calories per day with exercise ... theoretically i should lose 1 kilo per week. More to the point i need to get my head back focussed on the exercise and also back to a normal sleep pattern....going to sleep at 2am and getting up at 10am well those days are done with. And the best way to resolve to have to be somewhere bright and early tomorrow....and as there is a pilates class at 7am...thats where i will be! I just need to stop being a lazy ass and i have said this over and over lately but it is really now time to suck it up...make the most of all this spare time to gym it...the crazy thing is its not a case of i get to the gym and hate it...i get there and ill do what i need to do... its just the getting there part! So i wont weight for a few days....just get back on track....make sure fiona gives me some cardio homework...and really get stuck into things while making sure i dont go nutso. And yes it was the biscuits in the below post i went carb crazy with! lol. So busy day tomorrow....gym in the morning...then mid morning meeting a old school friend (who altho has seen photos hasnt seen me for over a year) for coffee (mineral water for me!) then at 3pm im off to the docs to ask for blood tests to test my hormone levels, sugar, iron etc i expect all is fine but just want to make sure all is okay there. Then i am going to go back and do the cycle class,,,i promise i will report back tomorrow nite all done!

Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

non stick cooking spray
1 cup wholemeal flour
1 cup rolled oats
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
3/4 cup brown sugar
6 tablespoons butter
1/2 cup banana puree
1/2 cup zucchini puree
1 large egg white
1/2 cup raisins
1/2 cup walnuts

1. Preheat oven to 180. Coat two baking trays with cooking spray.
2. In a bowl mix flour, oats, baking soda, and cinammon stir and mix
3. In a seperate bowl beat the sugar and butter with a wooden spoon until just combined, do not overmix. Add the bananas and zucchini purees, add the egg white, and stir just to blend. Add raisins and walnuts and stir to combine
4. Drop the dough by heaping tablespoonful on the baking trays, leaving about 1 inch between each. Bake until golden brown 12-15 minutes. Let the cookies cool on the baking tray for 4-5 minutes, just until they are firm enough to handle, then transfer to a rack to cool completely.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Weigh in day!

Big day today! I weighed in and lost 1.1 now down to 87.1 kilos (191.62 pounds) :) so 83.8 (184.36 pounds)kilos lost!!! I then tried on the one and only size 12 top i own....and it fit!!! (picture below). I then went to PT and to see my food coach. I discussed with Amy (my food coach) how much more weight to lose....Amy thinks i easily can lose another 10 but could prolly go to 15 kilos....which would put me at 72 kilos...i think i should just bite the bullet and get to 70 kilos which would mean ive lost 100 kilos. Amazing to think how close i am getting to where i want to be. Anyway after PT i went and tried on a dress from targets hot options was a black dress...low cut...went in at the waist and a A line type of skirt....(unfortunately was cut way too low for me) anyway the size 14 was too large! So i tried on the size 12 and it actually fitted!! LOL amazing...gawd it doesnt seem that long ago i would try things on and all i could see was my hips...and nothing would fit its really getting to a stage of too much choice!!! I still havent decided what to wear to my dinner on the 6th (i change my mind on a daily basis! lol) Anyway all up a fab day!!!

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Ahhh the scales...

The scales are down a whole 200 grams from last monday as of this morning!Over the last 2 weeks and 5 days ive lost a whole 900 grams (insert sarcasm). Ive been eating better then ever....ive been trying to eat "raw" more often. Berries and natural yoghurt for breakfast...salad with lots of greens and good fats of avocado, some turkey and nuts. And my normal dinner of chicken and roasted vegies. I did that 4 days this week. I expected a real significant loss...and it was really getting to me that i wasnt getting a decent loss. Then as i said the other day,,,,my cycle came and had been unusually painful. only stayed around for 2.5 days (normally 7 days) which makes me suspect one of 2 things.....either my PCOS is doing something funky...or maybe im heading towards menopause :( I think this week ill go to the docs and have a chat to him and get my sugar levels retested and also my iron retested, and just have a chat to him about it all. I mean ultimately if this is all related to my hormones...i mean all i can try to do is try and eat as healthy as i can and maybe even be just happy with maintaining and looking at any losses as a blessing. The fact of the matter is i am healthy these not about to die from a heart attack or stroke like i was 5 years ago....and the reality is that losing 82.7 kilos whilst having PCOS is pretty damn awesome. Of course i want to get into the healthy weight range...but maybe i need to just accept that this will be awfully slow for me....theres nothing stopping me from continuing to tone up and get fitter. I mean really who would have thought 5 years ago i would be a 80's girl! Its insane....but in a utterly great way.

Over the last 6 months or so ive done reading on raw foods....and superfoods. Im going to buy a blender and start having "green smoothies" for breakfast...i know that doesnt sound great but i hear great things about being that i dont love vegetables it would be a great way for me to get more vegetables in. Whilst i was watching different videos etc of it on you tube last nite i came across a nutrient called "msm" which is suppose to help with the condition of your skin. I came across a number of people raving about it....and one guy who had a significant weight loss (he was previously 400 pounds) who has minimal excess skin which he puts down to exercise, raw foods and im gonna get some this week and start taking it....cant hurt and even if it doesnt help with the excess skin over time its suppose to help with condition of your nails, hair and skin.

Friday, July 22, 2011

The goal weight conundrum...

Today ive had quite the relaxing day! My cycle this month has been the worse one ive had for a long time. 3 days of cramps :( usually i only have them for one day. I usually have quite the loss on the scales...but they have barely moved :(

Today i bought a food processor. It was the last one of the model as they have just got the new model in....only difference between mine and the new model was 50 watts on the speed and mine has some beige colouring on the switches instead of silver...but it was $90 cheaper then the new model! So impressed. Its a sunbeam 800 watts one. Gonna make some raisin cookies which are made with zucchini puree this weekend to give it a good test run.

Am really starting to wonder about what "number" should be my goal weight. Ive always thought 76 kilos as that is the number weight watchers gave me (altho ive since learnt 77 kilos is the top of the healthy weight range) i am starting to wonder how realistic this is tho. Theres no denying i will and do have excess skin. I suspect maybe its a total of 5 kilos of skin. I kinda thought for my height 70 kilos would be a nice number as its right in the middle of the healthy weight range...which is 18 kilos away but i really dont think my body has the ability to lose another 18 kilos....part of me wonders if i should just aim for 81 kilos....and then maintain for 6 months and just focus on maintaining, toning for that 6 months and then if at the end of the 6 months i then try to lose another 5 kilos. Its a longer way of going about getting to the ultimate number but maybe its a healthier way...its also hard to judge cos of the skin. I mean im never going to have the "perfect" body...i mean really i am healthy now...but im still not happy with me....but with the scales not moving much....i dont wanna end up with just getting frustrated with the scales to the point where i say "stuff it"....anyway something to consider some more.

Today i bought some cacao (raw chocolate) .... its a much healthier option and considered a "superfood" so come august 1 i am seeing a banana, cacao and peanut butter smoothie on the menu!!!

This weekend im going out for lunch with tania on sunday which should be great to catch up with her....have a fab weekend all!

Thursday, July 21, 2011

My exercise routine....

My brain has been in overdrive today. When i was at PT today and fiona was talking about ensuring i have recovery days...i mentioned i feel guilty when i dont do everything i actually have time for. I mean lets face it at the moment i have the time to be at the gym 10 hours a day if i wanted...obviously i wouldnt cos not only is it not good for you im also not a sadist ;). But at the same time lately i am really having to force myself to go to the gym. Ive never been a HUGE lover of the gym and probably wont ever be....but before i went on holidays i was fine. I enjoyed it (ok semi enjoyed it lol). When i think about it...i think it comes down to a couple of i wasnt going to the gym several times per day)....i was going in the evening and that was it (or mornings on saturdays), i was also only going monday, tuesday, thursday and saturday. So plenty of recovery days. And at the most i was going two days running. Part of me was thinking maybe i just need a complete break from the gym for a few weeks...but that's not the answer. I need to get it thru my head that i dont need to spend a huge proportion of my days while on holidays at the gym. So i'm gonna just work on doing the days i normally do when at work and only go in once a day....monday, tuesday, thursday and saturday. I just need to try and not feel guilty, this is where i think the biggest loser mentality has got into me and been bad for me. So saturday i was going to go for a walk around the torrens....i just checked the weather for saturday and its predicting a shower or i think i will cancel that and just go in to the gym and do the things i enjoy more then 30 minutes of stair climbing (yes sad i know but it is something i enjoy) and just body balance. Monday i will only do PT with some stair climbing (no combat/boxing monday evening), tuesday ill do boxing....thursday PT...thats 4 sessions over the next 7 wont be burning heaps of calories....but its getting me to the gym semi regularly. But ive cut my calories back anyway so it shouldnt really effect things (and seeing as the big exercise hasnt had the scales dramatically moving maybe its just better to pull back and ensure my diet is 110% spot on)

Ahhhh socialising!

TOM arrived yesterday. The good news was no gain....but usually i have a loss pretty quickly once it arrives...but still sitting at 88.2 kilos ARGH!!! Getting under 88 kilos is turning out to be quite the battle. I know its not a plateau yet....but especially as i have cut by calories back.

I mentioned i fell on monday night in combat..discussed it with fiona today...i was starting to think it was from being tired...and she agrees thats quite likely. I had done PT earlier in the day then boxing before combat (and boxing class kicks my ass more then any other class) so i think it was simply getting tired. So i am going to start to have 2 rest days per week (wednesday and sunday is my thought) where i do no exercise...just so i can allow my body to recover properly and avoid injuries.

Ive come to realise the whole socialising thing is hard....I know part of being healthy mentally and to be a good all rounded person being social, having fun is a component of it. But after being such a "hermit" and also not wanting to go off track....and wanting to ensure i reach my goal...for me at least .... its a scary thing. Not to say i dont socialise ...i do....but its not like 2-3 times every week.... its also scary for me getting close to someone on a friendship level. I have a lot of friends....but not real close one that i see several times per week....most of my friends i catch up with every 4-6 weeks or so...whether intentional or not .... maybe its part of my walls being keeps people at a distance....but its something i need to work on while keeping my boundaries. I cant let socialising over take my current weight loss goal has to stay my main priority....but i also need to learn to allow myself to start to build a social life....and even let people who i do actually want close friendships with to let them in....even tho to me (and i know for a lot of people this makes no sense) even tho for me that is a very scary thing. Its like anything....i wonder when they will reject the friendship.

Tomorrow i am buying a food processor/blender! So excited!!! All these things i can make....and i can finally use jessica seinfelds book using all the pureed vegetables :) On the weekend im planning to test one of her recipes....raisin cookies...they actually have zucchini in them! and only 132 calories each :)

Did a hour of PT today....rowed 1500 metres on level 10 in 6 mins 46 seconds...woot wooot!!!! Averaged out i was managing 500 metres in 2.15 seconds....cant complain about that for a long distance stint.

Have a good day all !!!

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

A couple of pics

Playing around with a pair of old size 24 jeans :)

Turkey, Avocado and Walnut Salad

Ive come to the conclusion that you need 5 ingredients for a good salad....vegetables/fruit, a good fat, a protein, a dressing and a handful of nuts. And thats precisely what I did for this salad...its so yummy and SO filling...i love it! So i am sharing it.

So firstly take your vegetables chop them up and mix them (i used baby spinach, lebanese cucumber, capsicum, bean sprouts), then add 50 grams (2 slices) of smoked turkey chopped into pieces, then add half a avocado and then 16 grams of walnuts. And the final touch...add some balsamic vinegar.

One of the reasons i love this salad is its full of "superfoods" which i really have got into lately. I love avocado and walnuts (did you know while things like olive oil and avocados are good fats they don't have enough polyunsaturated fats (which we need)? And walnuts do!)

And even better...this salad is only 298 calories for a huge bowl full!

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

I fell over last nite in combat :( Mostly just my pride was hurt...i landed on my ass once and one other time i nearly fell as well...both times doing the same exercise (shuffling backwards) im a lil concerned now about falling again...its really not fun!!

I did decide to pull back on my calories a bit.....ever since i have got under 90 kilos (which admittedly was only 2 weeks ago) but in that two weeks i have only lost 700 grams. So i have cut back to 1350 calories per day, and also decided to focus on more fruit and vegetables. On my high calorie days (monday, thursday and saturday) ill eat exactly as i have been. But when it comes to my low calorie gonna eat like i did breakfast was a cup of blueberries and 200 grams of low fat natural yoghurt....lunch was a salad with baby spinach, cucumber, capsicum, bean sprouts, 50 grams turkey, half a avocado, 16 grams of walnuts and a teaspoon of balsamic vinegar (all up only 298 calories)...a protein shake made with milk....a banana with 15 grams of natural peanut butter....and dinner is going to be 180 grams of lemon pepper chicken, cherry tomatos roasted and 30 grams of feta....1300 calories but lots of thats how my low cal days will be....the high calorie days ill get my carbie food weetbix...and sandwiches.

This weekend i am planning to go to the gardening store! Find some vegetable plants to plant....i have a few pots so i will get some things in the pots to grow. Who knows what....depends whats plantable (is that a word?) at the moment.

Today i went into the gym....did a boxing class....and then jogged up 2 flights of stairs....unfortunately my knee started to hurt then so i gave up. I need to jog up 20 this week. So didnt make much of a dent into that!! LOL. Tonite im not gymming it....but tomorrow will be pump (and presuming my hand can take my body weight by the morning) and balance plus 15 minutes of trying to balance on my hands and knees on a fitball....and then tomorrow nite free style cycle class. I also have started today doing the stretches i had for my achilles earlier in the getting the odd twinge in will get back on to that before it develops into anything.

Oh and if you want motivation of how your life could be at goal.... read this post

Monday, July 18, 2011

Weigh in Day and weekly wrap up

I think last week we can definitely call a success! After staying the same last week....i lose 700 grams and so now weigh 88.2 kilos. And the total amount i have lost is 82.7 kilos.

Last week i came to some decisions and put some changes into place. I decided I needed to get my social life back to how it was 3 months ago. 3 months ago it was controlled....generally as a rule most of my socialising involved walking with friends or going out for lunch/dinner with friends. These are things i can control and stay perfectly on plan. But once the socialising started to involve alcohol, party nibblies etc i was spending 1-2 days with challenges that really made staying on track difficult. No ones fault. But for me to reach my goals i knew i needed to change this....i also knew i was enjoying the socialising....and as i was enjoying getting out and about my focus on getting to goal was not as big a focus as it should be. So i did what we are always told to do....and thats put ourselves first. A big thing that lots of overweight people do...we just dont put ourselves first...and the results on the scales prove to me it was the right decision. I made a much better effort with exercise....and did 8 hours of exercise which was 2.5 times what i did the previous week.

I also started to get my focus on cooking and cooking some new recipes. I mastered a new muffin recipe and also chicken tikka masala.

The funny thing i focus more on my priority....i feel better about myself and happier. Ive come to the realisation that until im at goal that dating or meeting new people is just not on the agenda. Im not sad about the fact....there will be plenty of time for socialing, dating etc once i get to goal.

So now onto a new week and hopefully another loss. Did PT this morning....more torture lol....and in 5 minutes im about to run out the door for 30 minutes boxing....then 45 minutes combat and if im not too buggered a hour of bodyjam.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Banana and Peanut Butter Muffins

Banana and Peanut Butter Muffins

YIELD: 12 servings (serving size: 1 muffin)
214 calories per muffin

1 cup whole wheat flour
1/4 cup white sugar
1/4 cup packed brown sugar
4 tablespoons natural bran
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 1/2 cups quick-cooking oats
3 small bananas
2 tablespoons natural peanut butter
1 cup low-fat buttermilk
1/4 cup canola oil
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 large egg, lightly beaten
1/2 cup boiling water
Cooking spray


Lightly spoon flour into a dry measuring cup; level with a knife. Combine flour and next 7 ingredients (through salt) in a large bowl, stirring with a whisk. Stir in oats, bananas and peanut butter. Make a well in center of mixture. Combine buttermilk, oil, vanilla, and egg; add to flour mixture, stirring just until moist. Stir in boiling water. Let batter stand 15 minutes.
Preheat oven to 375°.
Spoon batter into 12 muffin cups coated with cooking spray. Bake at 160 for 20 minutes or until muffins spring back when touched lightly in center. Remove muffins from pans immediately; place on a wire rack

They did stick a lil when taking them out of the muffin tray but i think that may have been that it needed more liberal cooking spray on the tray.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Low calorie cream/rose sauce

Ok I discoverred this last night while cooking Chicken Tikka Masala and the more I think about it the more ideas I get for it. We all know making cream sauces are super high in calories. Well to make a basic cream sauce for one person use 2 tablespoons of no fat natural yoghurt plus 1/4 cup fat free milk and mix - works out to only 89 calories! Perfect for if you wanna make alla panna or a carbonara sauce. I infact might test it out with alla panna this week :)

Another sauce i love is a rose sauce....perfect with pasta with chicken, semi dried tomatos and spinach thrown in (and theres prolly heaps otherways to use a rose sauce) Anyway....exact same as the plain cream sauce but you then add half a tin of chopped tomatos (make sure you get ones which have tomatos only listed in the sigar/salt etc) and that not only gets some vegetables in but works out to only 123 calories!

Happy cooking!!

Friday, July 15, 2011

A good Week!!

Gymmed it yesterday. We did a lil cross fit circuit...with a bunch of step ups on a rather high step....and i have the sorest butt today! lol Freakin sore!! lol Even sitting they just ache lol. It could also be related to the 10 flights of stairs someone made me jog up :(

As you could tell from the previous two posts i then went dress shopping. I bought two dresses the black and white print one and the blue one (numbers 2 and 3) altho not everyone loved them...i love them. They arent tight over my hips/stomach area....and they are soft, floaty type dresses which i loved....AND they were both size 14!!!! So i have decided the blue one i will wear to the to match shoes and accessories....i cant believe i am going to say this but i am considering red shoes ? If not maybe some silver ones. Just some girlie heels i think. If i get the red ones maybe a red ring to go with it? If silver im think just a silver necklace.

I am still sitting at 88.9 kilos...TOM is due in the next 5-6 days so its either cos of that, im on a plateau or i need to cut calories back. ive been much better with exercise this week...ive done:

mon - 20 minutes stairs + 30 min PT session weights + 45 mins body combat + 50 mins body jam
tues - 30 mins boxing + 45 mins step class
wed - 45 mins body pump + 45 mins body balance
thurs - 60 mins PT session cardio
friday - day off

Tomorrow i am planning to do body pump and body balance and if i wake early enough sh'bam as well....sunday i am doing RPM and body balance. Which will mean 10 hours of exercise....much better then previous weeks!!! Next week i am planning to do the same thing except no jam and combat monday night (as i have plans with tania) then do pump also tuesday nite and wednesday nite do free style cycle and sh'bam. Which would give me 11 hours of exercise...which i think 10-11 hours while on holidays is a nice balance without being excessive. I must say i really liked the step class...will do it next week as well...shame they only have it twice a week (its on directly before my double PT session on thursdays but i try not to do anything before that cardio session cos i know fiona is going to kill me) it would be nice to build it up to two times a week. But in the mean time to slowly work up the stairs for the westpac climb...ill keep doing the stairs with intervals of jogging up the week....twice a week then one step class and also doing them in the thursday PT session that should allow me to slowly build up my cardio fitness. Not that my fitness is awful...but jogging plus jogging up stairs is hard, especially as my lung capacity sucks !

If i dont lose this currently eating 1628 calories per day....ill reduce by 1000 calories over the week (down to 1485 calories per day) and if i then STILL stay the same....i mite go back up to what im currently eating....just switching it all over the place may get things moving, or it could be simply a case of my cycle affecting things (at this stage at least i havent gained) 88.9-89 kilos is becoming a horrid number for me !!! lol

I really made a point this week to refocus on my goals...and im so glad i did. Even tho the scales havent moved its still been a good week and ive definitely started to get out of being so complacent and got some of my drive back to getting to that magic number of 76 kilos. Sometimes we just have to put ourselves first...and we are all different....and we work in different ways....and the sooner we realise that doing things OUR way...meeting OUR needs in the way that works for us...the more successful we will be.

I have also decided definitely come early-mid year next year i will do the PT studies that i have talked about on and off. I will be at goal then and hopefully will have started to maintain my weight...which will allow me to focus on the next goal in my life...but until dating/relationship stuff....keeping my socialising limited as it was 3 or so months ago...out to dinner with friends but avoiding alcoholic nites socialising wont be a big part of my life for the next 6 months and wont have a negative impact in me reaching my goals.

Tonite im trying my hand at making Chicken Tikka Masala with barley...hopefully it turns out....and am planning to do some baking this its a "foodie" weekend LOL...and with that have a good active weekend people!!!

Progress pic

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Dress Shopping

I went dress shopping trying to find a dress to wear to my 5 year dinner ill pop up some interested in any feedback :)








Tuesday, July 12, 2011

A Good Day!!!!!

Well so much happening lately...weighin was yesterday and i stayed the same so 88.9 kilos. Ive been super slack the last month or so in the exercise department so was no real surprise. But my food coach said..."increase the exercise or cut back on calories next week" eek!! So not surprisingly i am making a real effort with the exercise. Yesterday i did 21 flights of stairs (i jogged up 12 of them and walked up 9 of them - alternating one flight jogging then the next walking)...i then did my PT session and then last nite i did body combat and body jam. Today i went in and did a 30 minute boxing always at war with myself over boxing...its a huge sweat fest for me within 30 minutes....but kicking the bag i know can sometimes irritate my foot...but my foot survived it YAY :) Then tonite i went and did step!!! Thats huge for me...i havent done step for about 18 months....and when i did it then it killed my foot...i was in so much pain and it took weeks to settle down! But my foot coped good.

Now onto my exciting news (facebook readers mite just wanna bypass this paragraph cos its old news to them lol)....but a week or so ago....on Lorna Janes facebook they had a competition to go in a draw to win a $100 gift just had to say how Lorna Jane had inspired you and send a before and after pic. There was also mention that some may go into Lorna Janes book she is writing. Well i didnt think much about it and in fact i had even forgotten that i emailed them! Well today they emailed me to say Lorna Jane and her publisher loved my pics and story :) and want to put me in their book!!! HOW EXCITING!!!! Who would have thought 5 years ago i would be in a book!!! Who would have thought I could be PT client of the month at the gym!!! All super exciting stuff....this kinda stuff usually happens to other people...cant quite believe it so very exciting!!!

Not much else going on but had to share my news :)

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Skin Progress Pics

Since i got my panties all in a bunch lately about the "skin issue".......i decided to do a update of the skin this first pic i took at the start of march

This following photo was taken today...

My thighs which are my main concern are "smoother" not as i guess something is happening....but size wise they dont look hugely different to me...maybe a lil bit smaller....i keep hoping one day that fat above the knees will disappear lol but im starting to think i may be stuck with that. I can see tho that my hips aren't so out of proportion and its a smoother transition down from my waist to my hips. Of course the fat near my arm pits coming out of the crop top i hate .... im really conscious of it (altho in comparison to my thighs etc i know i shouldnt) i remember when i did ballet and was a skinny thing i even had those pockets of fat at the armpits then...and didnt like them then....and when i wear a tank top now....its something i really dislike....prolly worse then my "arm wings"...but overall theres improvement and thats all i can really ask for.

Whilst taking this photos is really putting myself out still glad i do it...for others who take the journey i have taken....but its good for me for getting my perspective....just hope no one looks at them and runs the other way ;)

Saturday, July 09, 2011

Rewrite of last post in a more positive vein.

So fiona wanted me to rewrite my previous post but put a positive spin on it point for here goes....

Whilst I havent been going to the gym as much as i would have liked and aimed to whilst on leave....this week im gonna focus on getting to the gym 5 days a week. Just one visit per day. Ill post a schedule at the bottom of this post....and i just wanna see that thru....missing no planned sessions...back to taking the "option" out of it. So no excuses about bad weather or wanting to stay home...just one week off staying with what I committ too.

Whilst I dont need to LOVE the gym....I do need to keep going and keep working towards a healthier me and just do my best. I dont need to excel..or be the best...but I do need to stop comparing...and get back to just running my own journey.

Whilst running isnt something I am focusing on at the moment...I am still going to work towards that goal of doing low pushups with perfect form.

Realistically where my weight is still not honestly acceptable...I set out to get down to 76 kilos....and i really need to refocus on that and reach that. And also with everything I know...I know skin can take up to 2 years to settle down...I need to give myself that full 2 years....then if its not acceptable then maybe relook at things. I do what muscle built (altho i want to look feminine) but I still think you can have a defined, feminine body and I guess there is not a 100% guarantee my body will resemble the saggy, baggy elephant....and since its not a guarantee...I need to just work at it as it is something I can do....I also need to remember that regardless Im a thousand times better off then I was. And once I get to goal...I just need to accept that its then the next chapter which will be at least 2 years in the making and not expect I will have a perfect body once I get there...I wont....but I will just work with what I end up with and make the best of it.

So the schedule ill stick to this week ... no excuses is:

mon - PT + combat
tuesday - pump + boxing
wednesday - pump + balance
thursday - double PT
saturday - pump + balance

Tuesday and friday during the day I will do any "homework" set for me.

Friday, July 08, 2011

I am trying to stop thinking about "at goal" the whole maintenance process does my head in a bit, so im gonna just try and focus on "now" and not so much on "then"

Gymmed it yesterday...quite torturous actually! Registered for the "westpac stair climb" which is to climb 30 flights (600 stairs)...fiona has started me having jogging up one and two flights at a time....kills me....i just dont have the lung capacity for it....and so am huffing and puffing like a mad woman. Did do two lots of 5 minute stints on the rower yesterday...on level 10....the first time i did 1121 metres in 5 minutes....the second time i managed 1166 metres in 5 pretty good. We also did some intervals on the xtrainer...i then went back in last nite and did 50 minutes on the treadmill...a couple of 2 minute stints of running and the rest just walking. Fiona had then set me to ride 20 kms on the bike in one go UGH i dont ride the bike enough and kinda sucked at it! lol I did 7.5km and decided that was enuff! (did do 20 mins on the treadmill too) tomorrow ill go back in and do another 7.5kms before body balance....and then either sunday or monday ill do the last 5kms....i was suppose to do it in one go...but it was killing me (my poor legs! lol)

I had been thinking of training to run the city to bay (12km walk/run) as the gym has a running group...but my physio didnt want me doing at least for this year that wont be a go-er (but prolly can walk it still) But maybe this is good gonna need goals to work towards next year....maybe by next year i can work towards it.

I of course had a big loss last week and was sitting at 88.9 kilos...not surprisingly the scales are moving slower this week...this morning was 88.5 kilos....ill be happy with a 500 gram loss this fingers crossed.

I got told i dont put enuff personal stuff on my journal! lol so you may remember a few months ago...there was someone i had been talking to of the pink sofa....and we met up at the end of april....well we are still spending time together...were for each other...and who knows what the future holds....but at this stage i am certainly enjoying spending time with her and getting to know her more :) Really amazing to me to think anyone could be interested in seeing me more then once LOL...but it is going nicely.

Not much else going on...apart from being blooming freezing here in adelaide...have a good weekend all

Wednesday, July 06, 2011

Getting to goal.

The closer I get to goal the more I think I am not in a rush to get to my goal weight! I mean firstly....I dont even really know what my goal weight will be!! I have always had the figure of 76 kilos being the goal weight (12.9 kilos away)....76 kilos is the top of my healthy weight range....and i think as i have said in the past i would like to get at least a couple of kilos below that. In a perfect world i would like to end up a size 12 on the top and bottom. But realistically with the excess skin on my thighs i dont think that is a realistic goal...and think size 14 may be where i need to settle...altho on the top half i think i can get to a size 12. As to what number that is on the scales who knows....its basically still a drop of 2 dress sizes....and to be honest i have been a size 16 on the top half for a longggggggggggggggggggg time now! The bottom half has been slowly shrinking....and i have lost some centimetres of the top half...but not enough to get into a size 14 top.

Which then takes me to what will happen once at the mysterious goal weight. Part of me really isnt in a rush to get to goal...mostly cos i do have concerns with how i will cope. Its not the eating....i think once im at whatever weight i can figure out what calories i need to sit at....and i think i would prolly always weigh daily to monitor the numbers arent going up. My main concern would be the gym. I personally have never understood why slim girls go to the sure for a lot they just enjoy it....being that im NOT a exercise lover ill never fit into that up until now ive been fine with attending the gym regularly....cos i believe ive had a very measurable goal or "reward" each week....ultimately mostly...if i exercise and eat right....ill be rewarded with some drop on the its all been very measurable....i know once at goal....ill still need to go....if for no other reason then to hopefully help with the excess skin....but thats not really a measurable thing....i find it hard on a week to week basis to see the difference in my body shape....its only really when i look at photos months apart i can notice some that will be my main concern.

Jaimee said to me once recently (look Jaimee you got a mention!!! lol) but she said once....once you get to goal....i know you will set another goal (she set the example of me going overseas to fix peoples eyes LOL).... i prolly will NEED to set some kind of goal....just so i will keep the gym up...I do realise theres lots of other benefits to the gym....including my overall general health....but lol it is a concern ALREADY.

Monday, July 04, 2011

Weigh in day!

Had weigh in today. On my scales this morning i weighed 88.9 kilos!! YES!!! The scales at the gym showed ive lost 2.6 kilos this week. Amy also measured me and in the last 8-10 weeks (wasnt sure of exact date) and i have lost 29.5 cms....with a amazing 9.5cms off my lower thigh!! YAY finally the legs are starting to shrink. My upper thigh i lost only 2cms but still its a movement in the right direction. The other good thing is my waist measurement is now 84cm...the recommended waist measurement for women is nearly there!!!! Amy asked me if i have rethought at all about having the excess skin cut off. I really dont want to go down that path...its a money issue, a time issue and a PAIN issue lol....but as time is going on im starting to feel like the saggy, baggy elephant...yanno a skeleton in a wayyyyyyyyyy too big outfit!! I really have hopes that once I get to my goal weight (which i think ultimately will be closer to 70 kilos as i still feel i have about another 20 kilos of "fat" to lose) and if with fiona we change my focus to more weight based workouts it may lead to some building some muscle which will help me to look a bit better. I know ultimately excess skin surgery shouldnt be done till you are at goal for 2 years anyway. When looking at my arms....Amy thought (whilst she isnt a expert of course) that while there is still some fat there its mostly skin....i have no idea....cos really when you think about friggin thick is skin? But amy thinks cos of the way it hangs....its mostly skin. That said...i did lose 2cms of my there is the possibility of it all shrinking more.

I just got a whisper of a position at work that may come up in a few months (perfectly timed for when i go back to work!)and it would be in the city!! Would be perfect!...i havent applied for any job since i got my current one over 10 years ago lol so i may be incredibly out of practice!!!

I am registering for the westpac stair climb which i am doing with fiona...i really need to work on my cardio and lung capicity to be able to do this (the aim would be to complete it in under 10 minutes) but am thinking of training for the city to bay....firstly i have to get the all clear from my physio...which fiona is going to find out week there is a running group starting at the gym...i can barely run 200 metres lol...but apparantly that wont need to get thinking seriously....and get my butt into gear if i decide to do it. It would be cool to try and run even 6kms of the city to bay and walking the remaining 6kms. Anyway will give that more thought when i know if i have the all clear or not.

Saturday, July 02, 2011

Reading for Weightloss

I was talking to someone from the ww forums last nite....and she made a comment you left ww and have done your own thing and got the losses....she went on to say she has seen so many come and go on the ww forum but not many stick to it. I went on to explain i am lucky enough that my personality is to "read and research" I gave up weight watchers probably 18 months before i figured out what worked for me. And it wasnt one simple answer. It wasnt like one magical pill...and then the weight loss figured itself out. It actually came from lots of sources....primarily it came from jillians book "master your metabolism" but after reading that fiona lent me a few books....and i started getting interested in not only weight loss then organics but also DIFFERENT foods...feta cheese...barley....avocado.... all yummy foods....just foods i never ate. But even today i realise there is probably information out there i could learn from. Most days i will visit a site called "stumble upon" brilliant site which feeds off other you put in your interests and then you sit there clicking and it takes you to different websites....i get great recipe sites...information on organics....exercise...self improvement...lots of stuff...and i really come across some gems of sites at times. Later this month the gym is doing a seminar on reading nutritional im pretty knowledgable on them....but im betting there will be some information ill get out of it. And my point is....whatever plan you do....weight watchers, jenny craig whatever....i really cant recommend highly enough to opening your eyes and looking outside the box. No one plan works for everyone....but if you take the bits of pieces you can from all over the place that makes sense to YOU as a individual and you will work out slowly what works for you. And also dont take everything as gospel...cos we are all individuals....i CONSTANTLY read....55% of your food should be carbs....i do NOT lose when i eat that much carbs...lots of experimenting has taught me 35%-45% carbs for me works nicely....with a focus on protein. So while i read it....its just one more of those things where i take what relates and works for me...and apply it to me.

Also for those who do wanna do some reading of books....ive listed some i really recommend....

* Master your metabolism by Jillian Michaels
* Inner Health, Outer Beauty by Joanna McMillan
* The end of Overeating by David Kessler

Friday, July 01, 2011

Well my last post about no diet coke or chocolates till end of July took off ! LOL Fiona saw it and decided to join in...and then posted it on her facebook plus talked to clients she saw yesterday about it and suddenly its grown a life of its own! LOL which is good means i definitely cant quit.

Gymmed it yesterday....did a hour of cardio in a PT session. The last few weeks we have been doing 250 metre sprints on the rower. My fastest time had been 56.9 seconds....but yesterday i managed to do it in 54.7 seconds YAY... :) Which is huge for me....cos its weird people think i am some incredible gym bunny...the truth of the matter is im not. I go because i dont really have a not athletic....never was even as a kid and i highly doubt i ever will klutzy...i mean hell i can even fall over flat carpet! lol Ill never be the fastest, strongest etc.... so to do a time like that...where i realise it is pretty fast is good to me...

This week ive been getting peckish after dinner....couldnt work out why....then it clicked...normally im at the gym in the evening and then home for dinner and a hour or so later going to sleep. So even tho im on holidays im gonna get back into my routine a bit (or try too) So as i initially planned to do....monday, tuesday and friday morning i will do a 7am class,,,,that will get me going to bed at a decent hour. Then next week i will try and go to do the gym in the evenings monday, tuesday/wednesday and thursday nite. As well as that ill go lunchtime monday, wednesday, and thursday and saturday morning. Prolly sounds a lot...but its prolly not in reality. I think it will work out about 12-14 hours over the week....which is basically within that 2 hour limit per day....and includes taking sunday completely off...and only doing one class on tuesday and friday. So should work okay.

I am thinking about trying to organise a get together for anyone whose had anything to do with my weight loss. August 6, which is a saturday is the 5 year "anniversary" since i started this weight loss thing....i usually hate organising things cos i expect no one will want to come (and im not great at handling rejection) so ive asked a few friends...depending on their response i mite properly organise it and ask everyone i would like to attend. It wont be a big deal....just dinner out at some restuarant. We will wait and see.

Tomorrow i am going in to do pump and balance....theres a sh'bam class on before hand as well....mite do that as well...i havent done it before....but mite give it a whirl.