Sick

I havent been well today...came down with a sore throat yesterday afternoon which i initially thought was just allergies but by late last nite i had the sorest throat (razor blades in my throat pretty much describes it...and sneezing felt like the blades were ripping my throat :() I was up most of last nite getting very lil sleep, drinking lemsip. It does seem to be improving already (thankfully) its nice being so healthy that you can recover things much quicker ;)

It has had me thinking a lot today, about two things...one is i need to eat cleaner. My eating isnt terrible...im coming under calories but its not perfect. The running is going so good....the next step i think is to build up my endurance so i can train the day before. I think part of the equation to do that is really fuelling my body well...so i need to increase the protein...cut out the crappy chocolate...eat more things like nuts, and fruit and vegies and cut back on the carbs at night. Its not about weight loss i just need to think about fueling my body better if i am really going to keep this running thing going and get the best out of it. I really wanna get back to exercising monday and friday nights..(at the moment im not cos the next day i am running) Im not really sure HOW i increase the endurance apart from keep running and improving and i guess then slowly bringing the exercise in. I also want to get into juicing more (need to buy a juicer for that) and also get back into my vegetable smoothies more.

Im off work tomorrow....so another day of rest....hopefully by saturday ill be better and can do some exercise. Lots of good foods into me :)

PS anyone got any great, simple yummy clean meals feel free to pass them on to me :)

Running!

Well i really wanted to post last night but i was too damn tired too be arsed! Yesterday was a HUGE day :) After work i went and met fiona for training...planning to run 3kms...we get to the 3km mark...and we decide to go further...and we just kept running...and running hehe ;) ended up runing 6.43kms! (actually prolly over 6.5kms cos when i map it i trace the outline of the river we follow which doesnt take into account the paths away from the river) Sooooooooooo i ran non stop for 53 minutes and 53 seconds....and yes i know its not breaking any ground breaking pace....but to be perfectly honest - i dont care! My initial goal was really just to be able to run 45 mins to a hour 2-3 times per week, which is obviously now doable. I highly doubt i would have done it without fiona tho...i know im slow...i know people over take me...and if i ran by myself im sure i would have said "screw this" by now. We were talking (yes talking and running at the same time!) about how much i struggled the first time i tried to run 2 kilometres....amazing the difference. Leg wise my legs are fine and didnt feel tired...and my breathing has improved so much...and might i add while running my nose was also running...so pretty damn well impressed! Now to keep it up and keep improving :) When i started training with fiona initially there was only a couple of goals....to do group fitness classes, to be able to do a full pushup (still cant do that) and to be able to run...i think i can say "im a runner" now :)

Afterwards we went for dinner with Sarah to a Thai place....which was delicious....i did go up a kilo overnight which i am guessing is sodium from the meal...cant say i am too concerned :)

My ankle is a lil tender today...so taking it easy today...tomorrow night i have PT and then will do a body balance class and will prolly walk on the treadmill before hand (maybe ill run a lil bit too hehe - just dont wanna tire myself out before the PT session)

Anyway thats all my exciting news...is all rather huge...i mean SERIOUSLY....me run 6.5 kilometres/ran 53 minutes....thats just like CRAZY talk! :)

Saturday :)

Great day yesterday! I trained with Fiona in the morning...we did another 3km run..did it in 23 mins 51 seconds this time...the first time we did it (and this was only our 3rd 3 kilometre run) it took us 27 minutes 45 seconds...so a really good improvement - go us :) The runs are definitely becoming more doable....my breathing is definitely more comfortable and the run itself is more doable...i wont say its easier....but it certainly seems more doable....not working out the day before definitely seems to be helping too :) After training with fiona i then went to the gym and did body pump and body balance...i burnt 1697 calories with exercise yesterday....woot! I then went clothes shopping and bought a real cute top...its all autumn colours...and think i might buys some brown pants and boots to go with it.

Anyway then went out last nite for dinner....it was for a friends birthday who whilst is on my facebook i havent seen for a few years. She was impressed with my weight loss :) it was a good nite...dinner wise i had a chicken burger and chips (eep!) and a slice of chocolate....but i certainly had enough calories to survive that....and funnily enough...even tho it was a high sodium meal i woke up exactly the same weight today as i was yesterday :) YAY :) Anyway i wore out my new top with black jeans...i think it would have looked much better in some tan jeans...i feel a visit to jeanswest in my not too distant future! LOL

I am feeling much better about things overall...i hope this continues (i think while i avoid the diet coke it should) it is still weird tho exercising only 4 days a week...that whole guilt thing comes into play and i think oh i should be exercising. Even tho I realise with time hopefully my endurance will improve enough so that i can end up doing at least light workouts the day before the runs. But since the running is the focus at the moment (and it does burn so many calories...we run for approx 20 minutes...then do intervals for the rest of the hour and i am burning close to 700 calories a hour which at my weight is pretty damn awesome!)

Change

Ive made some decisions! I had already 99% made them then after a chat with Sarah in our PT session i have definitely decided on this slight change. So after last weeks disastrous run on saturday....i decided as we were running on wednesday this week not to exercise on tuesday....and it worked a treat...the run was great...i did good...and mentally i wasnt cursing and wondering wtf i was doing. So as we run normally tuesday and saturday i had thought that maybe working out monday and friday was not the wisest option. So i then spoke to Sarah tonite as i know she runs...and asked her whether she exercises the day before she runs and she basically said the same thing as me...she struggles mentally and physically if she works out the day before. So i wont be exercising mondays and fridays. So instead my exercise days will be tuesday, wednesday, thursday and saturday. Id like to find something to do regularly on sundays cos that would then give me 5 days...but for the moment 4 days is fine. When i had the dexa scan they said to burn a minimum of 1800 calories per week...which is doable working out 4 days per week. (ive burnt 1403 this week so far with just 2 days of exercise) So i did have my first PT session with Sarah tonite and all went well :) I told her i want to focus on traditional weight stuff at this stage and that fiona suggested she give me homework to support the running. So for homework i have a couple of ankle strengthening exercises, some skipping (on two feet and just on one foot) and she also went thru some foam rolling stuff to do after my runs :) So tonite wasnt anything major....did LAT pull down with close and wide grip, lunges with holding free weights and 85 kilos on the leg press ( i havent done traditional weight stuff for like since last year...so i was doing only a couple of kilos of my body weight....but last year in fionas sessions i was doing in excess of 100 kilos but im sure improvements will happen over time :))

The running is really slowly becoming a focus...which is so bizarre when i think how many times i tried doing that bloomin C25K program. But have a plan and that committment with fiona makes it easier...theres no getting out of it...and yanno we are outside (i wouldnt run outside by myself - even now) and yanno we chit chat as we run which helps it seem like less torture lol but its definitely improved when i compare last nights 3km run to the first 2km run and im not meaning just cos i could do it...but how i feel mentally....im not so self doubting and thinking its too long...and i was definitely breathing much easier last nite....we were going at a pace i could definitely handle....fiona said afterwards we prolly could have run to 4kms at that pace and shes right im quite sure we could have....so its not so scary now thinking about doing 4kms...even tho when i think the point we need to get to is like quite a distance away lol but then...i never thought id get to 3km. I remember around christmas we were doing runs and they were like 1.75kms and OMG i thought i was dying LOL pure torture....so its nice to think im accomplishing this :)

Scales were down again this morning so all going good in that area too!

Another 3km run :)

Mighty proud of myself tonite...and for the first time i am starting to realise running 5 kilometres IS doable!!! :) We ran 3 kilometres tonite...in the rain no less...last week when we did it it took us 27 mins 45 seconds....today it took 25 mins 24 seconds...so ran it 2 mins 21 seconds faster - i was super impressed. And i didnt struggle too much...the pace was fine for me...so maybe i am improving...i mean i remember when we ran the first 2 kilometres...and fiona talked most of the way and i remember saying i wasnt talking back just listening to her cos i couldnt run and talk...tonight i was able to casually talk,,,and as fiona pointed out i didnt whinge and bitch once while doing it LOL So i think my plan of not working out last night worked well. I am sure in time my body will adjust to working out the day before i am running...but if i can build this running up cos it does burn more calories then anything else...i burnt approx 120 calories every 10 minutes tonite and about 15 minutes of that time was just walking!!!

Food wise things are going good...altho i am seriously considering buying a juicer...my snacks arent great...if i could make a juice and take that to work..it would help during my breaks to avoid the carb snacks. The scales are still going down. My water intake is up to about 1.8 litres a day...over the next week or so im hoping to build that up to 3 litres a day...so hard when its so bloomin cold!

I ate soup for lunch again today! Chicken and sweet corn soup today...so a lil bit of extra vegies i wouldnt be normally having...super impressed! :) So its not huge changes nutrition wise...but i am making changes....and will slowly keep making more changes.

I finally finished my Schapelle corby book...ive got some other books i ordered by karin slaughter and sue grafton i have ordered fingers crossed they arrive tomorrow!

So far I am going good YAY :) This morning i was down to 88.4 kilos (was 90.3 kilos last saturday) - thank goodness! My clothes havent been feeling too comfortable...its nice they are slowly starting to sit better on me. Last nite i gymmed it...first time on a monday for agesssssssssssssssssssssssss!! Did a 30 minute boxing class and then 45 minute body combat class - burnt a great 899 calories!!! :) :) Was good classes boxing is such a huge high calorie burn for me...all the lying on the ground then jumping up for 10 seconds doing some kind of jab (and then repeat, repeat, repeat) is so hard on my heart rate! Shoots up like crazyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!! Tonight i have rested as i am running 3 kilometres tomorrow nite....and exercising the night before i run doesnt seem to work well :( im learning this running and my other stuff is a bit of a balancing act to ensure i do what i should do on the days im not running but not so much i havent got enough energy to run.

I cant remember if i said i am starting to train with Sarah as of this week? I will still (of course) be training with fiona twice a week...thats where the focus is on running....on tuesday and saturdays....and on thursday ill be training with Sarah...so have my first session with Sarah thursday night....we wont be exercising prolly this week tho...mostly talking so we are on the same page :) Still looking forward to it. Im looking forward to getting a routine going with Fiona and Sarah....will be suggesting to Sarah i do weights with her (and fiona suggested i get her to set me weekly homework to help with the running lol...but thats good...thats what i need! If they set homework ill do it....and i prefer it that way cos then i have aims for what i need to do each week)

So its now 4 days without the diet soft drink...the headaches have definitely gone....and its funny i just feel my thinking is clearer....and that was one of the things i was struggling with over the last few months...i didnt seem able to make clear decisions. But that seems so much better now :) and i feel a lil happier and just not worrying so much....hopefully its not just my imagination!

This weekend i have a friends birthday to go out for...its for a friend i went to school with...and a few friends from school are going...whilst some of the friends have seen my photos over facebook all except once havent seen me in person for a couple of years...so will be interesting! Might need to buy a new top or something to wear :)

Day 1.

So far day one back on track has gone perfectly. I had 2500 calories (my high calorie day). This morning worked out with Fiona...we first of all ran 2kms...and we were trying to do it in under 18 minute but actually managed it in 15 minutes 32 seconds. The rest of the hour we were walking with some spurts of running. In a hour i burnt a massive 695 calories :) I felt much better mentally after the session. I then went to the gym and did a hour of body pump and a hour of body balance. My metabolism must be working so much better lately....normally im not hungry after i work out and have to make myself eat. But the last few days ive noticed towards the end of the sessions getting hungry...im taking this as a good sign :)

Scale wise...day 2 of my cycle and i was expecting a huge gain...but only went up 100 grams :) so while its still not a good number (90.3) its better then it could have been. I did burn 1451 calories and am confident tomorrow or monday morning ill hopefully get back under 90 kilos :) So tomorrow is rest day and below is my workout plan for the week...

monday - boxing + body combat
tuesday - running with fiona
wednesday - boxing + cycling
thursday - PT session with Sarah (first PT session so we will mainly be talking)
friday - body pump
saturday - running with fiona + body pump + body balance

So its been over 24 hours since i stopped the diet coke...i have a slight headache...ive already had a painkiller...and will take another shortly...but apart from feeling tired i do feel like im thinking clearer so thats gotta be a good sign :) Will be interesting to see how i go over the next 4-6 weeks im really hopeful that not drinking it will lead me to think clearer and not be as moody as i have been.

Not much going on tonite....night at home...am planning to get a serve of carbonara from the local lil italian place (calculated into my calories) and soooooooooooooooooooooo looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow...bring it on!

Kicking this weight loss in the ass!!!

Well this is a incredibly overdue post...but i think its taken up till today to realise whats going on with me. Several months ago i weighed 79-80 kilos...i wasnt happy....i wasnt getting below that number and not happy that i may have got to the end of the road for me. I decided i was going to maintain but i really sucked at it...slowly i put a kilo or two on...i tried 1200 cals for a few weeks which started a binge cycle....the occassional week i had a good week and got some losses but i wasnt consistent. Over the last few months....ive struggled....i havent been cooking much....ive slowly eaten more and more carb snacks....about 8 weeks ago i started drinking diet coke....i was telling anyone who listened how i hate working out and suddenly i also wasnt motivated to work out. I still kept up my PT session but not much else.

I always have thought to myself...having such a public journey i can NEVER gain weight...imagine if i put on 20 kilos how people would talk? So much for being this great weight loss person. Well the truth of the matter is this morning i weighed 90.2 kilos :( tomorrow morning will be 48 hours into my cycle and knowing my cycle i will have another gain tomorrow. I feel like everyone can see ive gained and prolly thinking "omg look how she has let herself go" and in a sense i have...this is all my own doing...no one elses. But if there is one thing ive learnt on this journey is that i cant give up...this is really make or break time for me...im only 10-11 kilos of where i want to be....its not actually the end of the world but if i keep gaining it might as well be!! So its time to knuckle down...get back to enjoying this journey and my workouts and getting back to my "happy place"

So whilst some people (friends at work...friends i socialise with) knew id been drinking the diet coke again for a few months...id kept it pretty quiet not wanting to tell fiona i was drinking it again! lol This morning at one work one of the guys said to me "what did fiona tell her when you told her your drinking diet coke again" i was like ummmmmmmmmmmm nothing???? Cos i havent told her! Later in the day i was drinking yet another diet coke....and i just realised...it takes like a chemical...the taste is nothing special...and certainly the taste isnt worth being unhappy and gaining weight for! So i finished that can of drink...sent fiona a message telling her whats been going on (oops!) and with that...that is that!!! So i thought about it....and thought im going to go back to what the doctor at the dexa scan said to me....2000 calories per day...calorie cycling...getting my protein up and burning at least 1800 calories a week. So ive worked out the calorie cycling...went to the health food store and picked up some tahini and some more protein powder (a BSC one that has 30 grams of protein per serve! woo!) I then gymmed it...unfortunately i hadnt eaten for several hours (like 5!) i got to the gym burnt 299 on the stairs and cross trainer...then went in and did pump....but had a bit of a dizzy spell :( my weights were higher then normal again (warm up 4.75 kilos each end, squat 7.5 kilos each end, chest 3.75 kilos each end, back 3.75 kilos each end, lunges 5 kilos, biceps 2.5 kilos, shoulders mixture of 1.25 kilos - 5 kilos, and 3.75 kilos of each end for triceps) unfortunately tho in the lunge track i spaced out...must have been obvious too cos the instructor said several times "are you okay karyn" and then said later i know u did higher weights but were u okay...so smack my ass for not eating prior to working out (specially as i burnt 800 calories!)

Anyway so with my cycling 2500 calories tomorrow....no cakes, diet coke...and lots of fruit! (not too excess of course tho!) Running with fiona in the morning followed by pump and balance...perfect day to kick this weight loss thing in the ass!! :)

I overate a lil last nite....i knew cos of the cravings my cycle was around the corner...got it this morning...and not such a nice number on the scales. Anyway i got up this morning jumped in the shower...and 5.30am in the friggin morning i am having a dizzy spell :( was not fun...then the cramps kicked in by the time i got to work....and just to add to how crap my body felt my throat/back of mouth started hurting. Now since about last november (when i hurt my back) ive been the queen of excuses to avoid the gym...but thought no dammit ill go do pump at the very least...did pump...burnt 410 calories (up the squat track to 7.5 kilo on each end of the bar and 4 kilo on each end of the bar for the warm up) i think tomorrow nite ill increase the chest track too...very very happy :) I then went and did RPM and some how burnt 510 calories! It was a very old release of RPM (she said about 4 years ago) and it seemed much harder then normal RPM classes...so burnt a total of 927 calories...super happy with that :)

Not much else to say...yay for friday tomorrow....its turning out that this weekend is going to be pretty plan free...so tomorrow nite body pump (and going shopping for a Spibelt) then saturday morning going to run with Fiona (another 3 kilometres im guessing!) followed by pump and balance...have a good friday tomorrow all!!!

MY gym :)

Ive been sitting here thinking. As i mentioned in the earlier post i think what missing from this whole health and fitness thing at the moment is exercise.

When fiona worked at the gym....i was 110% committed...but the whole time i use to think "if fiona leaves i dont know if i would stay"...anyway fiona did resign and i was a few months into my contract...and at that point i started to think...yeh ill prolly quit fernwood...i even a couple of months ago went and had a look around goodlife gym...its a nice gym, closer to home and cheaper....so was thinking id prolly go there....and its still a consideration...only cos they are open on sundays...but it would be a "back up gym" just for those times i cant make classes at fernwood. A week or so ago i sent a email to fernwood asking the manager to give me a price on a basic membership and also a basic membership with a PT session per week..anyway havent got a answer to that yet....but ive decided i WILL continue with fernwood....it is MY gym after all (and i dont mean that in a possessive way lol but its the one i feel comfortable at) so after month of dithering...its time to get that level of focus and committment back....as i use to think to myself...im single i have more then enough time for the gym...so its time to throw myself back into it and go every weeknight and saturdays when im free as well and do a many classes as i am able to make...just as i use to aim to do! Its time to get back to 80 kilos....time to work this not so lil ass out...so monday, wednesday, thursday and friday are gym nites...saturday is a gym day and tuesday of course (as well as saturday) is running with fiona day! I dont even care if the scales move slowly....i just want to see this body shape change more...just like it use to change...:)

Ran 3 kilometres (at a snails pace!)

So last night i RAN (or my interpretation of running lol) 3 kilometres....and we wont tell Fiona but truthfully i could have run further...i suspect i could have run at least another 1km. I was incredibly slow....it took 27 mins 45 seconds to run the 3 kilometres,,,,of course at this stage its just about completing the distance not the time....but it did occur to me i could prolly have walked 3kms within 30 minutes lol. But i am glad i did it. And i guess i know if a month or two down the track a 5km fun run came up (theres none so dont panic! lol) I feel confident i could complete it. I know most people aim to do 5km in under 30 mins i am obviously not at the level of completing 5km yet nor is my time even close to it! lol But its all good :)

Fiona then talked to me about positive thinking (apparantly its not one of my skills! lol) no real surprise...since i always think everything i do...even if not initially...eventually i will fail at whatever it might be...anyway...i guess kinda deep stuff...that fiona believes i need to address (sounds fun eh?! lol)

The scales are up about 600 grams at the moment....my cycle is due anyday now...and my stomach pains are telling me its not too far away :) So until my cycle is over (cos it seems to be VERY crazy lately) im not going to pay too much attention to the scales till my cycle is over. But I have worked out my exercise routine for the rest of the week and next week....AND i WILL do it all! Its really the exercise thats missing at the moment. So.................

thursday - pump + RPM
friday - pump + stairs
saturday - run with fiona + pump + balance

monday - boxing + body combat
tuesday - running with fiona
wednesday - boxing + cycle class
thursday - PT with Sarah
friday - possibly pump - need to check what time i finish work
saturday - run with fiona + pump + balance

Ive actually considered getting a basic membership with a local gym thats open sundays. 3 out of 4 sundays i am off work....and its a pain...waste of a day that the gym isnt open...and a local one has pump and balance on sundays so i am considering it.

Well theres been a bit going on in the background....partly which i skimmed over recently but over the last few day has really reared it ugly head.

A month or so ago i was having some real mood swing....fiona suggested i go thru my journal to track when these were occurring in relation to my cycle. My cycle turn up mid month and these were occuring 7-10 day prior to my cycle. Anyway i researched it a bit and read that krill oil and magnesium can help with this. Last month these mood swings lasted for about a week or just over....i get the mood swing again this month too...they havent lasted as long but they have felt more intense. They remind me of when i would get depression but only in that 10 days or so before my cycle. Interestingly enough also last thurday/friday i gained 1.6 kilos (ill explain the significance of this in a minute) so anyway i went to the doctor this morning....he agrees it is hormonal and thinks (wait for this lol) my brain i retaining fluid...and thats causing it....interestingly enough today i "mentally" feel better altho very tired today and my eye have been literally hanging out of my head....but what interesting is the scales dropped from 87 kilos to 85.4 kilos....0_o So anyway i told him not interested in antidepressents...so he has recommended taking Blackmores "PMT" if that doesnt help....he gave me a script for the pill to balance out the hormones. Fingers crossed the PMT stuff helps...cos im not overly keen to take the pill...aparantly the Blackmores tablet includes a diuretic which should helps.

Onto the numbers on the scales....last monday i was 86.5 kilos and this morning 85.4 kilo....so a 1.1 kilos loss for the week - cannot complain about that!

Back to work tomorrow...and tomorrow night running with Fiona...still havent decided whether to run 2km or 3km but might bite the bullet and run 3kms...the running program for this week is suppose to be one 3km run and 2 x 2km runs...but might bite the bullet and just do it...we will see.

Have a good week all.. :)

Refocusing.

I need to really get in the zone and focus on this journey. One stumbling block i have is that whilst the DEXA scan gave me as 78.9-80.9 kilos as my "ideal weight" and i struggled to get any lower then that...i wasnt happy at that weight....i know thats mostly cos of the skin and knowing full well i never intend to have it removed i know i need to get into a better level of acceptance of it....when i tried to get under 79 kilos and then tried way too low calorie diets which started a binge cycle i ended up at over 88 kilos....i seem to have got down to 87 kilos...a couple of times under 86 kilos but no further...im sure its a mental thing. When i had the DEXA scan and he told me i need to lose 5.1-7.2 kilos of fat...his big focus was on cardio...and i quote "your focus needs to be cardio, cardio, cardio"...he didnt seem concerned if i lost muscle during this process whilst that concerns me greatly cos if i lose the fat AND muscle the skin will look even worse. My plan was always to build muscle once i got to "goal" which really means i need to get below 79 kilos...so i have the room to move with any weight gain due to muscle. I know really tho at the moment i shouldnt worry about that..i just need to well first of all get under bloomin 85 kilos and then work on getting back down to under 80 kilos. As ive done it before i know it is doable as long as i dont let my head mess me up.

Starting this week fiona and i will be running twice a week which should certainly help with getting in the cardio....if i can throw in at least one boxing class, one cycle class and some stair climbing in there that should get my cardio levels up to what i hope will start to see some good movement. Then once there i guess i can try to come up with a plan on how ill maintain and what ill do to improve my body as much as possible taking into account what i have...its never ever going to be perfect....and i really need to accept that and just make the best out of what i have....bottom line....the reason i am disappointed in it is my own doing...im not discounting ive done good with my weight loss....but bottom line i was the one who got me over 170 kilos...so i need to just accept that, and maybe if i can really get into this running gig ill have a good new focus (lets take it slow tho and not jump the gun! lol)

Exercise wise im not going to plan too far ahead this week....body combat and body jam tomorrow night....(wow been monthsssssssssssssssssssssssssssss since ive done that combination!) might do the stairs before the class too....and tuesday night running with fiona...trying to decide whether im ready to try running 3kms....might bite the bullet and try....if i manage to do that...it would be pretty darn amazing in my eyes :) and maybe just the boost i need!

I want to set a very realistic goal....weight loss wise....so im going to really focus on getting under 85 kilos by end of june (deperessing to read earlier that last july my goal for this june was 75 kilos! EEK!!) Thats basically 2.1 kilos and ive got 7 weeks to do that...i sure as hell should be able to do that since its only a average of 300 grams per week. So by next sunday night i wanna be down to at least 86.7 kilos - wish my luck!

Oopsie...slack blogger :)

I owe a blogpost eh! Ive been a lil slack...I wasnt very well earlier in the week....and as well the lead up to my cycle i got moody ugh :( But on the upside it only lasted for a few days where as last month i last for over a week. So the combination of magnesium and krill oil seems to be helping there :) Today emotionally i just felt soooooo much better and happy thankfully. Altho I could have eaten a horse! Thankfully i didnt lol....Foodwise ive been good all week...when i weighed in after my sydney trip on May 1 i was 87 kilos....then monday i was 86.5 kilos and this morning 85.8 kilos....but my cycle is coming so im expecting a jump over the next week or so :(

Last night i did RPM (sigh never as good as freestyle cycle - RPM is just wayyyyyyyyyyy too easy for me these days....the freestyle cycle is so much more challenging) i then did a PT session .... lots of ab stuff...at one point she decided to "test" me....i had one foot im the trx...the other resting on the back of my leg....my arms holding my body weight up (like in a plank/pushup position) then i had to bend my knee and bring it to my chest and back again OMG and had to do 15 of the buggars...i expected very sore abs today...so far so good...we will see if they are sore tomorrow! lol Ahhhh I found a video of it!! LOL So i did this without the twist except nowhere near as good LOL




Anyway glad the scales are moving in the right direction. Need to buy new gym shoes tomorrow after work...then on to the gym for pump.

Big weekend this weekend (kinda lol) training with fiona for a hour saturday morning...then off to the gym for pimp and balance...after that i am meeting up with a freelance journalist who wants to talk to me about approaching the paper about running my story :) and then saturday night out for dinner with ms martine. Sunday think i might venture out to the north adelaide fashion and vintage fair.

Anyway thats it....friday tomorrow (yay)....and my weekend starts early - 3pm! Bring on this weekend :)

UGH

UGH just UGH!!! Ive had a sore throat off and on for the last few days...not bad enough to have to go to bed but enough to keep reminding me its there...then today my ear started hurting and copped a headache....so i suspect im on the verge of something not so nice invading my body :) So im thinking a few days of rest and no outdoor workouts in the evening for this week. I didnt gym it tonite and wont tomorrow either. Ill have PT with Nora on wednesday or thursday which ill attend...but i wont do anything too much before the end of the week.

So this week its really focusing on nutrition...get my body to 100% and tackle the gym once im 100%. Its a pain and i feel guilty about it...even tho i know getting my body 100% i still feel guilty. :( so the answer is just to be on top of my nutrition and make sure I get enough sleep.

I did manage at work today to swing some shiftswaps to get the next 6 weekends off...so i have some regularity there....i also put in for leave the last week in October when Fiona, Sarah and I are looking at going to Sydney again and that got approved...so yay :)

Not much else going on...enjoy your night :)

New week....gonna hit it hard :)

Well i think the holiday is definitely over! (Not surprising since ive been home for nearly a week! lol) But this is my first full week...and now i have the info from the scans its time to settle down, focus and work on getting back under 80 kilos.

So a couple of things i am going to be mindful of with my nutrition .... maximum 100 calories per day on chocolate....increase my water...and lots of good carbs. This week i have the weekends off and im on early starts so gymming it 6 days a week is perfectly doable. So my plan (which may alter slightly as i need to change my wednesday PT session)

monday : 30 min boxing + 21 flights of stairs
tuesday : 60 mins session with fiona (running)
wednesday : 30 mins session nora plus depending when i can change that session too possibly 45 mins cycle as well
thursday : body pump + 2km run
friday : pump (will go very light)
saturday : 60 mins session with fiona + 1km run + body pump + body balance

I just need to stop doing everything half heartedly i know i can get back under 80 kilos since i was there not that long ago....this weekend also off to the health food store to pick up more healthy things...more things i can add to my cereal (like goji berries) to increase my calories healthily...and i wanna dig up some recipes for some slices i can add protein powder too to increase my protein.

As of this morning i was 500 grams down since i got back from Sydney...imagine how much i woulda lost if i was dedicated? lol. That said...exercise wise wasnt too bad....i got back monday night...i ran 2km on tuesday....wednesday i did a hour session with nora...thursday i ran with fiona for a hour and friday i did pump and cxworx so not a disaster but i think my nutrition needs attention at the moment :)

Fortunate....

Ive had such a good day....and really do feel so FORTUNATE.

This morning i met sharon (shazzy from ww) for coffee and was lovely to catch up with her. I then went and did pump and cxworx class (oh my abs!) then tonight was the SPEECH!!! OMG was so nervous haha but omg it went so much better then i expected. I had written a speech out then decided to just use cue cards....well once i started talking i didnt need other! I was really concious not to talk too fast and from all accounts i didnt! Was only a small group but i thought it was the perfect size for my first go :) I got a few laughs and afterwards people said i did really well. And was so funny as i was sitting there talking...tracing my journey....i realised....in 2006 i set out to save my life...and i have done that....and its huge for me to admit i have been SUCCESSFUL. I am not finished...but really now its like ive built a statue or something...and now im just polishing it up...all the structural work is done....now just need to add the finishing touches. Of course i still have other goals...but what i set out to do i have done. :)

Im also so lucky as i was coming home i was talking to Sarah and she was saying how long have you been hanging out more with me and fiona....and we were chit chatting and i was like ive just been so fortunate....i hired a trainer...who became a mentor...and now as well i have this nifty friendship with her and sarah....when i went to my first PT session with fiona i didnt even expect to last! Lil own have all the other gains i have had....its really enhanced my life in so many ways :)

After the speech fiona, sarah and i went out for dinner. I had crispy chicken wings with chilli sauce and then some duck...i love duck and dont have it often so that was pretty dandy!

The other plus is i am just a LIL excited (okay a whole lot excited!!) Fiona and her partner Leigh have been working on a website for me...the aim is to get my story out there...lead to motivational speaking...in time make it possibly interactive...maybe run some challenges or have a forum and it be a way for people to keep up to date with what i am doing!! So TA-DA the url is http://kazzsjourney.blogspot.com - my blog will flow into there but it will get to a point at some stage where ill just update there and not on blogger but ill give lots of warning for that :)

So yes...today i am just SO aware of how fortunate i am....SUCCESSFULLY SAVING MY LIFE - you cant get better then that!! :)

Another 2km run done and dusted

Had PT with Nora last nite...all i am going to say is O-M-G....first half of the hour was using the dreaded TRX...which not surprisingly left me sore abs lol then for a refreshing change some boxing followed my "OMG my head is going to explode" anxiety. LOL its hard to explain but you are standing with either leg on each side of a bench...leaning on the bench then you have to jump and your feet land on the bench and your in like a squat position....was quite positive i was going to do the biggest face plant in the world...anyway had to do 20 of the buggers....and it took me well over 20 minutes to build up the courage to do that lol

This morning the scales were down by another 400 grams :) So slowly going back down...currently 86.2 kilos...my goal is to be back under 80 kilos by the time i go to Sydney in September.

Today i slept in "ahhh bliss" then went over to mums and setup her new wifi modem and ipad. I then went into town to meet up with Fiona. We went to run 2.13km i did walk twice for oh i dunno 10 seconds each time thruout it...cant believe after next week i will need to run 3kms...like what the!! But anyway....60 minutes later 604 calories burnt...shows u how much you burn running...we walked for 5 mins then did the 2km run and id burnt over 350 cals at that point...and that was only 22 minutes into the session!

Im realising more then ever...my headspace needs a good talking too! Less telling myself "i cant" and more "i will" i think is needed....who knew.... the harder work wouldnt be the exercise itself but whats going on inside my head!! :)

Sydney

I can say without a shadow of the doubt that this 5 days in Sydney was the best holiday ive ever had :) It really came at the perfect time....i had the chance to step away from day to day life....and not stress about my weight loss journey etc and just focus on me and "living" (and really isnt this what it is all about it???) and I think by the time the end of the trip came without trying some important things had "clicked"

So i left on the thursday....arrived in Sydney a lil before lunch time....went and checked in to the hotel. Then went and grabbed some lunch and then wandered down to Circular Quay, after wandering around for a bit i then caught a ferry over to Darling Harbour and then walked back to the Hotel to meet up with Sarah and Fiona. We then met up....walked down to the rocks (should i mention fiona reckons while we walked down there some guy checked me out hahahah *rolls eyes*) anyway so we stopped for this photo of me and sarah (photo taken by photographer extroidinaire fiona lol)

We then went for dinner at the rocks...found this lil restuarant that was in this lane which was all paved....kinda reminded me of what i imagine paris is like...i shared a pizza with sarah for that meal (yumm!) and of course a pic of me studying the menu!! lol

We then went on the ghost tour...which i really enjoyed. It was a lot of historical stories...i really enjoyed it. I did get a bot woozy in one of the houses (was warm and musty in it) i would definitely recommend it for a nice walk around the rocks! We then went back to the hotel.

Next morning we walked Sarah of to the convention centre for her convention...and me and fiona went off for breakfast! Pancakes with strawberries and bananas with a hot chocolate anyone??? And of course photos were required!! lol

We then went walking around...around Pyrmont and then back down to the westfield. It was then lunchtime...and we went to "Bodhi's" which is a vegan yumcha restuarant. It was dumplings filled with lots of different great ingredients....and again photos!!! lol

Filled with carrot:

Filled with beetroot:

Tofu with satay sauce:

Iced Ginger Lemon Tea:

Best Dessert...was filled with black sesame seed paste:

After lunch we went to a beauty salon and had a beauty treatment each :) Fiona had a manicure with a hot parafin treatment and i had a pedicare with a hot parafin treatment. Was soooooooooo good....so glad i did it :) We then wandered around some more and then headed to a restuarant at Darling Harbor called "Blackbird" and i had a wood oven pizza....was so yummy :) and we followed that up with a iced chocolate from the Lindt Chocolate Shop with 2 white chocolate balls (heavenly!) we then sat out right at the harbor while fiona took some photos....fab fab way to finish the day :)

Saturday was Adventure Caveing day, we were up bright and early leaving the hotel at 6.30am *yawns*...and of to the train station....for a 2.5 hour train ride to Katoomba...followed by a 75 minute coach ride to the Jenolan Caves. Only problem with this day was we didnt have anything to eat before we left and ended up surviving till we returned to Katoomba on 3/4 of a turkey and salad roll and a hot chocolate. At the caves we did a self guided audio tour...heres some pics....

We then went to the organised adventure caving tour. Now this is basically where they take you to the top of a small mountain and you climb down the mount inside it. So we first of all did a 10 metre absail (this was good!!) then we entered the cave and started climbing down it. It was hard...physically and mentally. You had to climb up over rocks...down over rocks...some with mud and water on them....so a real test of agility...i wasnt as scared as i thought i would be...but i really had to concentrate and i was half expecting to fall and break my ankle or something lol. There were about 3 tight squeezes where you are in bizarre positions like lying on your side having to pull yourself thru a small hole...i mean it was hard....and you needed strength....definitely mentally and physically. Once we got near the end i was a lil over excited to see flat ground LOL...fiona said it sounded like i was singing i was so happy :) lol. I dont for a minute regret doing it in fact i was glad too...it was a lil proof that i CAN do things like this. Here are some photos from it:

We had decided the night before to go for pancakes for dinner that night. After the long trip back to Sydney we went to pancakes on the rocks...and there was a line up out the door at like 8pm at night!! hahah after barely eating all day we couldnt line up for food....so we wandered around darling harbour and found the BEST restuarant...was called Adria...the best carbonara I have ever had....omg so yummy!!!!! We of course went to the lindt chocolate shop after for a ice chocolate LOL (are you seeing a theme yet!!) We then headed back to the hotel after a veryyyyyyyyyyyyy late night!

Next day was sunday...we had breakfast at darling harbour (of course!!) i had bacon, scrambled eggs, oven roasted tomatos and sourdough toast....not the greatest meal ever but still did ok lol. We then went to the fitness expo...i didnt spend here at all (surprisingly lol) but nothing was overly cheap so didnt bother....i did pick up lots of health and fitness magazines and also brochures on PT courses.

Lunch time we finally went to pancake on the rocks! YAY!!! I had pancakes with banana and caramel sauce:

We then wandered back into the expo for a while....then walked back to the hotel and said goodbye to the girls as they headed back to Adelaide. That night i was then meeting someone who is on my facebook who i know from the weight watchers site (sapphy from the weight watchers site)....so her name is Sarah...we went for dinner at Baia....i had a yummy carbonara (again lol) was a really good night...we got along very well and found her very easy to talk too :) And by the end of the night we had already decided next trip to go for a girls night out :)

I then went back to the hotel....very tired!!

Monday morning i checked out of the hotel and went to "measure up" for my dexa scan (see previous post on this) I then went for breakfast at circular quay...right by the water. Breakfast was baked eggs...omg so yummy!!!:

The rest of the day before the airport i wandered around Darling Harbour....bought myself a hard rock cafe tshirt and a cute lil pink cotton top from "temt". At the airport i stopped at Victorias secret...and bought 5 pairs of knickers

So the trip was fab...what i have realised....while i never expected a flat tummy and a pert lil butt...that prolly the majority of my stomach now is loose skin....there is prolly still a lil bit of fat there (but considering the amount of "fat" its been recommended i lose is only a maximum of 7 kilos and the doc thought i prolly have about 2.5 kilos to lose of each leg and a kilo or so off each arm...im prolly not going to lose a lot of my stomach...its pretty evident now...the stomach is mostly skin and it is what it is. Its nothing bad...while i would have liked to end up with a smaller stomach...i think what ive got now is prolly how its going to end up....i think realising that im prolly not going to lose a lot of my stomach....so all about dressing good to minimise it. I feel good....it doesnt feel like im a failure...i mean when u think of it....at the ABSOLUTE most...i have about 9.5 kilos of fat to lose....is a pretty damn awesome effort considering where i came from...i also prolly wont lose the whole 9.5 kilos of fat....he recommended 5.1-7.2 kilos of fat left to lose. So while i cant say im successful at this weight loss gig yet....its not going t be too far off where i can....im hoping when i go back and get it redone in september my body fat will weigh 23 kilos or less....which would be a fat loss of about 2 kilos...

The scales did drop 400 grams overnight....so yesterday was a good eating day (just as today will be!)...off for a hour PT session with Nora this afternoon...hopefully my ego isnt squashed too badly in it! lol Enjoy ur wednesday all :)


PS gonna write up a post on expectations over the next few days...especially for us girls who start 130 kilos plus....the sooner we have those realistic expectations the better we are off i think! :)

DEXA Scan

I am going to write a post about my Sydney trip over the next few days....but todays post is going to be about my DEXA scan and where i am going to head with my journey now.

So for those who dont know...a DEXA scan is similar to a xray...you lay on a bed and they scan your body. Its a simple process...altho costly ($150) but if you are on a journey like me i think the information is brilliant....so firstly ill give you the info the report tells me:

*My bone mass density is 1.147 which is above the average (means my bones are good).

*My BMC which is the weight of my skeleton is 2.53 kilos - a woman wants it between 1.5 and 2.5 kilos (if less then 1.5 kilos your bones wont be as strong) so thats a great result.

*Total body fat: For a woman should be between 20 kilos and 25 kilos - mine is 24.698 kilos so I am in the healthy weight range for this but they would like me to get that down to about 20 kilos. You are doing really well if your body fat weighs between 15 and 20 kilos...so im on target....not there yet but getting there.

*The body fat percentage for someone my age is 23-34% - mine is 27% - that said they said dont focus too much on this its more about the weight of the fat they want me to focus on.
Abdominal Cross section : This is the fat deposited centrally and determines your risk for heart disease etc...If its over 1 kilo you are at a high risk of heart disease and under 600 grams you are a low risk and i am 503 grams :) So very low risk in respect t that.

*Lean Mass : This is the muscle tissue in your limbs, as well as the muscle and organ tissue in your trunk. The total lean mass of most females should weigh 40 kilos and 35 kilos if you are short...my lean mass is 64.921 kilos so it is very high. He in fact said that i have one of the highest levels of muscle he has ever seen in a female :) He did tell me that part of the reason its so high is because when i weighed 170 kilos my legs had to carry around that weight every day so thats why they are high in muscle. he in fact said...if i lost another 15 kilos and 10 kilos of it was muscle that would be fine and that he doesnt recommend i focus on weight training.

*My resting metabolic rate: this is the amount of calories i would burn if i lay down in bed for 24 hours doing nothing...and due to the high muscle mass it is very high and is 1871 calories....which explains why a 1200 calorie diet didnt work for me....and why eating 2275 calories works for me. He suggested i stay at the calories i am eating and if i plateau out then maybe cut back to 1900-2000 calories throwing in the odd low calorie day.

*My ideal goal weight by their scales is 78.9-80.9 kilos (there scales are about 2 kilos heavier then mine)...so im setting my goal weight by my scales as 78.9 kilos....its more then that number its about needing to lose 5.1 kilos to 7.2 kilos of FAT

* Based on my resting metabolic rate they recommend 1900-2000 calories and to eat the macronutrients as:
Protein : 143-150 grams
Carbs : 166-175 grams
Fat : 74-78 grams

*Recommended I burn a minimum of 1800 calories per week.

*They also advised that my excess skin weighs at least 5 kilos and possibly as high as 10 kilos.


So now I have this info what next? For a lot of things not much will change....Except I have a few more things to aim for...to make sure I am reaching the fat and protein levels. To ensure I am burning 1800 calories per week (I generally burn 3000 calories or more per week) The big change is no focus on weight training. My PT session with nora and my outdoor session i do with fiona will still be resistance work....to ensure i maintain the muscle but the big focus will be cardio, cardio, cardio. So theres no stress if i dont make body pump each week. And whilst i had considered doing cross fit that option is completely out the window now lol. Running is definitely going to be the big focus, along with cycle, boxing, combat classes. And maybe in time Ill start to do body attack and step. The other thing is i wanna do more core work so doing cxworx whenever i can (unfortunately my gym only currently has it during the day) and of course body balance as I think balance helps me not to lose weight but with so many other things.

I think most know ive been struggling with the new stuff i have been doing with the new trainer and things like pushups and chin ups etc...im still of course going to be doing those things...but im just going to try and not focus on those things so if im not doing great at them thats okay because its the cardio etc that i want to focus on. I think by tackling it this way is what I need to do....I think maybe i was putting too much expectations on myself so by putting the focus on what i know i AM capable of whilst still doing the other things i think will help to get me over this bump. Maybe it wont work....and in all honesty i may never do a full pushup or a chin up...so for me thats not going to be the "goal" but the running which i do feel is doable will be the goal!

So do i think the DEXA scan was worth it? ABSOLUTELY! And i am planning to go back to Sydney in September to do a follow up scan to see how i am going with getting body fat closer to 20 kilos instead of nearly 25 kilos :)

The other news is I did gain while away...I ate some AMAZING foods....i was 83.9 kilos the morning i flew out and was 87 kilos this morning...and thats fine...i feel completely refocused....absolutely no stopping me! I will lose this 5.1 kilos of FAT :)