Wednesday, May 11, 2016

Weigh in :)

So I weighed in! Last wednesday I was 127.8 kilos and this morning i was 126.3 kilos, also my body fat is normally around 51-52% But this morning my body fat % was 50.4% :)

Food wise I have had a perfect day. I then went to the gym, and did 15 minutes on the cross trainer (10 minutes at level 10 and 5 minutes at level 5) and then I did a 30 minute group PT session. It was a weights session ... I could do every exercise....maybe not perfectly LOL but I still managed to do every exercise.We did squats with bar bell...I did 10 kilos plus the bar and could have gone heavier...then we did cleans and i did 15 kilos on the bar for that, some bent over flys with 3 kilos, and 2.5 kilos for tricep kicks. We were doing partnering work and at the end the girl i was partnered with turned around and said you did good....:) So i said thanks and she did its allowing me also to interact with others but im really surprised how i am handling the group sessions.

I was out with friends last night and we were discussing mothers and weight loss....and somethin occurred to me. When i lost my weight I did it for me. But i had gone thru my teens thru to 30's with mum always banging on about my weight...and whilst i did it for me....part of me im sure did it thinking....well this will keep her off my back. As i lost the weight tho i was very disappointed that for all the grief about it she gave me she never seemed too happy when i would tell her more progress....but that is ok cos i was doing it for me. But as i was talking last night something occurred to me...i think maybe subconsciously when mum passed away i may have saw it as a chance to have a break. Kinda like a kid getting up to mischief when the parent is away. That knowing she was constantly on my back about it was gone...i didnt have to do it to stop her from hassling me anymore. Anyway as i was discussing this with my friends i was all like OMG. But after i came home i kept thinking about it....and i think theres some validity to that....but yanno what this is bigger then mum...this is about me....and this completely determines my current and especially future life. If i want to travel and do adventurous things, if i want to meet someone and get my "happily ever after" nothing can get more dediication from me (apart from need money to pay for all this!) But its actually felt today like a weight is lifted. Ive told myself so many times "this is my priority...this is for me" but over the last few years i havent believed it...ive thought it .... but its not been authentic. I KNOW now this is so important and this is for me and absolutely no one else! Im excited to see where my progress will be by xmas...i think i finally have "got it"


Tranquility road said...

Have you ever seen a coucellor or therapist?

I can't wait to see your progress either

Karyn Colley said...

No lol...and am not going too ;)

Tranquility road said...

Fair enough xx