Reflection : Giving up the gym

So its been about 10 days since i decided to quit the gym. It really was a hard decision to make and even once I had made the decision I felt bad...I felt guilty. Admittedly that only lasted for about 24 hours! LOL

So am I glad I am currently not a member of a gym? Actually yes. Doing that and going back to weight watchers has allowed me to focus simply on my eating. Theres no pressure. Simply stick to my daily points, eat nutritional food but try and eat foods I really enjoy. I have stuck to my daily points every day except melbourne cup day (altho wednesday I was accidently under by 2 points) and I have used 20 of my weekly points. Tomorrow is weigh in and I am hoping for a good result. :)

So stepping away from the gym has allowed me at my own pace to start to think about what are MY fitness goals, and when I do return to the gym I dont want to exercise "for weight loss" whatever track I go down I simply want to be active/exercise to support whatever fitness goal I have at the time. I keep going back to when I trained with Fiona, who I obviously had my best results with. Fiona always had I felt a unique approach .... I always felt she had a very holistic approach. The very first time I met Fiona....I stumbled while getting off a bike and I remember telling her I hated the gym....that it felt like a chore (sounds familiar eh?) at the end of that session...she wasnt saying to me...."our focus will be for you to lose 50 kilos"....it was "our focus will be on your balance and getting you to not hate the gym" In the years I trained with her she very rarely, if ever asked me about my weight loss. Sure it was discussed but mostly that was when I bought up the topic....I never felt pressure from her that there was a expectation to lose a set amount each week...or get down to a number on the scales.....her focus was always just on getting me a bit happier with myself. I use to do 3 PT sessions a week...the first year or so we did one which was strength training....one which was boxing (simply cos of the fact I loved boxing) and one was a focus on core and balance. Fiona was always led by me....she would tell me i know when to change things up from the conversations we had...especially in the beginning tho it was just about trying to enjoy the gym. And yanno i never "loved" the gym....but I enjoyed our sessions...I liked the variety and I became dedicated to the gym.

So anyway its led me to believe this break from the gym is doing me the world of good. Its definitely a weight lifted off my shoulders....its also led me to a point of slowly just reassessing fitness goals that i want. By not talking to others and being influenced by only my brain and nothing else....it is allowing me to get some clarity. Now that said...I prolly wont return to a gym till I am under 100 kilos. So where my head is at currently for fitness goals is:

1. zumba classes - i did one at my old gym....really enjoyed it so thats something Id like to do when I return to activity
2. adult ballet classes - this is prolly something more for when I am at goal but its always been at the back of my mind. I did ballet for years and was really good at it....so would love to get back into it at some point.
3.  running a half marathon - When i first joined a gym at 160 kilos...i would see these girls run on a treadmill...always seemed like ostritches....they just flew like they were weightless....and as a 160 kilo girl that was always a focus. Of course in the past i did run 12km in the city to bay...fiona used to tell me....you will never be a sprinter lol. Running has always been a goal for me and im a slow and steady person so eventually a half marathon would be a good goal.

I think when I do rejoin a gym....i will prolly do some strength training maybe twice a week....but the difference this time is i would prolly research strength training to support running goals. When I initially return also my focus wouldnt be on HIIT training (not knocking it just at my weight dont see the fitness benefit of doing 5 sprints for 30 seconds...now I know it makes you fitter and I know its good for weight loss...but as i said...i will want to exercise for my fitness goals (ie running) and this will be when i first rejoin) at that point my focus will be on slow, steady state cardio....I will be wanting to build up the time I can exercise. Cos not only do i ENJOY that more...the way i see it....thats what half marathon runners do!