Well...this week has been a disaster! But its made me realise a couple of things...one i will always be in "recovery" .... i guess i did/do have a eating disorder not in the sense of anorexia (obviously!) but in the gravitation to the fridge....and when im not monitoring and on top of things....i eat for the sake of eating....i even noticed i will be full but still eating! Recently i read a article that said "a person who has previouly been obese physically and psychologically will never be the same as someone who has always been slim" i didnt really believe that statement initially but now i realise its true....even once im at goal i am always going to have to track my food.
Anyway ive decided i will go back to updating this blog daily .... generally i still post 3-4 times a week but for a while i need to refocus on this and put all the pieces of the puzzle that previously had worked. So the gruesome details is...this morning i weigh 85.5 kilos...UGH....in a week i have gained over 5 kilos....now i do realise a substantial amount of that is fluid...i always gain crazily when i go off track and i know ill lose MOST of it pretty quickly if i truly get back on track. And that means cutting out all the processed crap thats snuck in of late...protein shakes, protein powders, wagon wheels, freddo frogs, muesli bars, ... i didnt realise how "processed" my eating was getting till i read back on my journal and there was a post from 2 years ago...where i had written down the food i had eaten that day...and it was process free....so thats what i need to get back too...plus lower calories with the calorie cycle...i CAN get not only under 79 kilos...but down to 75 kilos....if i flippin apply myself.
Also have asked fiona for us to increase the intensity of my training sessions too :) While my fitness level is okay its really not where it should be....so im going to have to start to push myself more in her sessions. I also really need to focus on minimum of 3000 calories per week.
So i have started the day well! 2 weetbix with chia seeds, pure honey, milk and 40 grams sultanas. :) Might even start to cut the honey out...that was a super filling breakfast and loved the sultanas (thats a new thing i tried today lol) ive already downed 600 mls water (not hard to do when ur dehydrated!) and am now on to my second 600ml water.
I am a lil worried about my first slim session....it will be the first week of the foxy challenge...so im just going to tell her...i want to do things my way...yes your scales will show a gain...but i just want to treat it as fresh start...big goal but id really like to get down to at least 78 kilos by the end of the foxy challenge (so to be it in 13 weeks)
Will be back tomorrow (DEFINITELY!)
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