Sunday, November 14, 2010

Hidden Away

Mostly I dress pretty decently...people constantly say "oh the gym has helped so much your so toned" and recently some even said "why have you been hiding your legs"

AGes ago i said i was tempted to post some pics of my "excess skin issues" i feel weird doing it like its some pervy thing lol altho of course no rude bits are in the pics ;) but yet at the same time...i want to document it as well as i do get asked the "do you have a skin issue" question a lot. So firstly heres the pics....first is my stomach...



So...there it is ! LOL If you notice on the left side of the pic...there is a bulge of fat at the bottom of my ribcage (not that u can see my ribs of course! lol)...thats a pocket of fat...i hate it...everytime i wear fitted clothes its so freaking obvious...it will never go apparantly unless i have it surgerically removed (i have 3 of these pockets of fat...the other two you can only tell if you feel but that ones horrid) I am obviously still have a big stomach...altho its no longer a budha stomach ;) the stretch marks have faded a lot...and i actually dont have too many issues with my stomach...im sure it will decrease more...it certainly is not firm and has loose skin but to me its not the end of the world.

Next is my legs UGH



Okies...these are the parts of my body i have the most issue with! Theres still a lot of cellulite but it has dramatically improved. As you can see if you compare my calves to my thighs its like body parts of two different people...my calves are fine (altho a lil on the fat side but smooth etc at least) Whilst its not overly obvious in the pic towards my inner thigh is very wrinkly and definite loose skin...also you will notice that my skin also hangs over the top of my knees.

Its my legs that get me down more then anything...no matter how much muscle i build there they will never be okay...ill never be able to wear skirts or shorts above my knees...never wear a swim suit...unless i have surgery....

People who have lost...30 or 40 or 50 kilos often say to me...oh yeh my legs were bad too...but theyre fine now....well ok...but that wont be the case with mine...kinda annoys me to be honest...if i say my legs are bad and the only cure is most likely surgery then having someone whose lost 30 kilos tell me...they had the issue and theres is fine now well *UGH* its not the same... my journey and the issues will never be the same as someone who has only 30 or 40 kilos to lose.

Of course...it is ONLY excess skin...it is a vanity thing....that excess skin wont be what causes me to have a heart attack or stroke...it was my previous weight (and the weight i carry still and the time i spent unfit and unhealthy) that would most likely cause that. It is nowhere near as bad as having no energy, getting puffed walking to the letterbox etc etc...and of course its going to be a constant reminder of where i never wanna be again...but still at the same time theres a part of me that would like to be able to wear a knee length skirt.

8 comments:

JustJo said...

Wow wow wow!! And that is not Wow in a bad way, but Wow in a way that you inspire me!
It is almost like looking in a mirror! I have that pocket of skin in the middle of my stomach just above my waist line and i HATE it!!
i also have a small waist like you and the skin issues on the thighs.
And, I too am resolved to the fact that I will never wear a swimsuit on it's own...
And it SUCKS!!! To lose nearly 80kgs and not be able to have a body like in the movies SUCKS! BUT.... like you said, it's not the skin that will cause a heart attack :)
You have saved your own life - be proud of that :)

Carlton said...

Kazz you are such a brave person posting these pictures.... As I've said many a time you are such an inspiration to me...

You should be very proud of yourself and how far you've come...

Martine (email: mdally@internode.on.net) said...

That post is so brave and honest ! Martine x

Kerry said...

I really admire that you have put these pics in your blog. I don't think i would be brave enough to do it.

My big thing is my arms. I have this huge amount of excess skin that just hangs like bat wings from my arms, and i know damn well that i will have to have surgery to have it fixed.

Like you. I have heard lots of times "i had that prob, but with time it just went away", but also like you, i know and understand that no amount of muscle building is gonna make that excess skin go away. Its there for ever unless i get it surgically removed.

You though, are such an amazingly strong person who is kicking some serious ass on this rollercoaster that we are riding every day.

xxx

Euphie said...

The dreaded loose skin! It's amazing that some people say they refuse to lose weight because they don't want to end up with excess skin. (Well, OBVIOUSLY this is just an excuse)

Like you say, it's excess body fat that contributes to diabetes, CHD, stroke, cancer etc - not excess skin. Given the choice I'll take the skin.

Still, it does kind of suck that we can't all lose the weight and have the skin magically disappear.

You might find that it improves a bit - some people say that it takes up to two years after reaching goal for their skin to settle into its "final" shape. Still, you may need surgery if it really is driving you nuts.

Just cross that bridge when you come to it. You might decide to get a lower body lift or you might not.

In the mean time keep working towards your goal, make the most of maxi dresses (with some bike pants underneath to keep things in check), and enjoy the journey.

Well done! Keep inspiring us all.

Tina said...

To be honest Kazz, I expected worse. Keep exercising like you are and it will look way better when you get to goal.
You inspire me every day Kazz :)

To Band or not To Band? said...

hey kazz! have you read jon gabriel's book? It has hints on how to lose weight and have NO excess skin. To me it is kind of a mind,body.spirit book, rather than a diet. He lost 100kg+ and now has a washboard! CHeck it out.

Pinky said...

I am in awe of you kazz - you are doing amazingly and you are a brave person to post the pics but thanks! - I too have problems iwth my thighs and Ithought I was the only one! - THe overhang above the knees is the pits and I hate wearing anything the sits near my knees!
Keep up the inspiration!