Thursday, April 30, 2009

oh well good planning and we are not too busy today - YAY ! So relieved cos i was really dreading today hehe

I think i am now comfortable with coming to the conclusion that a lot of my issues lately is just self confidence. When i started training with Fiona altho they were hard exercises at the time they were all doable...they were stepping up and down off steppers...doing squats...lunges etc...sure they were hard but my brain knew they were doable. Lately tho its all stepped up a bit...the pushups against the bar (my brain knows i cant do pushups) the TRX which scares the crap out of me...in someways even when overweight we do squats etc in daily activity...trust me hanging like i do from the TRX i dont do in my daily life...so i lack confidence and feel out of my comfort zone which makes me feel weird and makes me feel like a loser and so the catch 22 situation occurs. Yes i also am finding it weird getting attention but i think the thing that impacts me, that scares me the most is fear of not being able to do these things. Fiona knows how i feel and im sure she prolly even realises a lot of it is just my self confidence. The funny thing is several friends have joined ww lately lol tuesday nite i was talking to my friend Dayne and she suddenly says "we joined ww" lol...i was stunned and then she started asking me how do you manage to eat all your points...so we chatted a lil. Then this morning i am at my desk and jenny one of the girls here who joined ww a few weeks ago comes over to me and is like i lost 1.1 kilos this week ! So its funny kinda like people are coming to me cos i guess they see its working for me? Then i was standing in the office and tony and michael were both talking and looking at me and im like what? and michael comes over (michael whose my old team leader and who i ADORE !) comes over and hes like we were saying how uve lost more weight hehe so all good

My jeans are really getting looser ! So my hips and stomach must be shrinking...the top i wore yesterday i need mum to alter cos its huge on me and showing way to much boobage yesterday LOL

Tonite it is PT YAY boxing tonite...my legs especially my left leg are still sore from tuesday nite. I think cos she noticed haha that when she tells me to go to the "weeping wall of woe" as she calls it and i start in a squat position i was kinda creeping up so she was having me go in a much lower squat position so that left inner thigh is a bit of a killer at the moment.

I think saturday afternoon i will prolly go wander down rundle mall...i wanna go to katies cheapie area i just need to buy some tshirts and at least one pair of pants for the gym...i was there in there regular priced section the other day and saw some real nice work out pants but ill try to get the cheaper ones since i wont be wearing em too long anyways. The tshirt im wearing today is one i got for $9.95 from katies and i feel so thin in it especially across the shoulder area...its nice not always feeling like a heffer LOL

Okies people off i go...few more hours of work before its home timeeeeeeeeeeeee

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