Sunday, April 16, 2017

Business end of easter :)

Happy easter all!

I have done superwell and hit a new low this morning of 116.8 kilos - amazing!

I love how well I am currently doing. Which I put mostly down to doing "iifym" - otherwise known as "if it fits in your macros". I think I previously mentioned I go thru a company called Equalution. They have me on high calories (2100 cals a day).  They give me a meal plan each week which is pretty high in protein but also incorporates things like home made chicken burgers, pizza, chicken carbonara - which I love I just dont have a desire at all to go off track. And each week I can tell them of any "food requests" which they incorporate into my meal plan. Like this week being Easter I asked them to incorporate hot cross buns....so I have had a hot cross bun with butter each day...completely guilt free which has allowed me to participate in the same thing as my co workers and not feel I am missing out.

Its been really free-ing. After years of micromanaging my nutrition....having a certain number of grain free meals per day, watching my sodium, cutting out certain products and only going for "healthy options" when eating out....I am getting that in moderation no food is bad.

The other week I went out for dinner so they did what they call a "social adjustment" - so I basically sent them a menu of the restuarant I was going too, told them what I would prefer to have and they worked out my days eating - by dinner time that night I am eating half a 12 inch bbq chicken pizza :)

So yes its all going well...I had hot cross buns....i had a few bits of chocolate...I really cannot complain....and at the business end of the easter weekend i am very happy.

Mentally I am in a good place as well. As i gained the weight between 2013-2016 i really felt a lot of shame. I was the "weight loss queen" an inspiration to so many and then suddenly I lost it and was a obese woman lacking control. I am still classified as obese but I dont feel obese. I am active. Really starting to make progress with my fitness and strength. I eat well...binge free...and have a real good nice balance of moderation.

At this age I have also realised so much the importance of health. I am 49 its prolly a age where you are more inclined to get some kind of illness. I am hoping by the end of the year to be what I consider "healthy" - I felt healthy when in the 90 kilo range. I often had people comment you look like you weigh less then how ever much I weighed. When I look back at photos at the time....no I wasnt a size 10...I was a size 14-16 in clothes but I felt and looked good...and i really had a healthy appearance.

At this stage i am super keen to get under 110 kilos. Not because of clothes or anything but because I remember going from 109 to 111 kilos and it was like over night i was like...woah ive really gained weight....when under 110 kilos while i knew i had gained weight it didnt at this point feel like it was out of control.

Okay enough rambling! Have a good night all :)

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