So I have been missing in action and the truth of the matter i spat it this week with the whole weight loss thing and at myself to be honest. The scales went up a lil this week (now in my rationale mind i know its prolly fluid...mostly cos TTOM is due but also my left foot has a tight feeling so im pretty sure im retaining) but after the last month with my attempts at the gym i just spat it. Was sick of the scales...was sick of feeling the obligation of going to the gym and the diet and everything remotely healthy has flown out the window. So i am now debating...ive come to the conclusion the fernwod diet is not aimed at someone with 70 kilos to lose nor do they have the answers for someone with 70 kilos to lose. So i am going to go back to what I know what works and what my intuition tells me is the right thing to do and thats ww. Now its just a case of deciding whether to attempt to do it online or whether to attend meetings.We have a new roster at work coming in from june 1 which would mean 2 out of 6 weeks i could not attend a monday night meeting...but those weeks i could attend a tuesday morning meeting...part of me is thinking....give it a go online for a week and see how i go...if all goes to plan...then keep at it online (as it is cheaper that way) until it doesnt work then attend the meetings...another part of me knows i need the accountability of the meetings...so decisions decisions. I wont lie this week i have changed my mind daily on how i should tackle this...everything from have a break from scales nd everything that goes along with it...to celebrity slim....to biggest loser club...to lite n easy. The bad thing is too...i simply didnt turn up for my appointments at the gym this week...they tried contacting me...but i didnt answer the phone (on purpose lol) honestly...i think i need to simply get some losses on the board...and get my confidence back in regards to that...cos after this last month i have started to doubt if i can do this....maybe now im 40 my metabolism is too stuffed up...but realistically i know i can do this but i think i need to keep it simple and introduce things slowly. So firstly i will simply get back on to ww follow the points...then once i have gained some losses...i will introduce some exercising. Not walking cos i just think my feet arent cut out for it....prolly get some dvds (like the biggest loser beginners one) and just do that....and also my walk away the pounds...just do it simple like i did 18 months ago when it all worked fo me. In time i will go back to the gym but i wanna introduce it slowly cos right at the moment the thought of going to the gym repulses me. So not giving up...more going with my intuition.

Friday we had our "ignite roadshow" for work...so basically everyone was off the phone by 12.45 pm and we headed down to west beach shores to this function room where basically there was like a 45 minute speach...then they let us run free...they had a room with "3 minute angels" who were giving massages, another room which had about 10 consoles set up (and i had no idea what i was doing with them ! lol) and then there was food and drinks for free. Then after that we went to the grange hotel for dinner...OMG yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm i had rigatoni with chicken, ricotta, spinach, and sun dried tomato...was the yummiest pasta meal i have had in so long.

And I have a few nites out coming up..on the 24th is the next golden dance and me and felicity are going...and on the 31st is tracys 40th...tracy and i went to school together...and lots of people went to school with will be going so should be very very interesting nite LOL

Okies...off i go