Well its been a interesting 4 or 5 days. I ended up going to the docs friday afternoon for him to tell me i had pinched a nerve in my shoulder and basically i needed to not lift anything and rest it and to not go to the gym for a week or so. Initially i was very frustrated after just getting into the exercise routine. Saturday and Sunday i did rest it. Sunday night I decided it was time to exercise a lil so while biggest loser was on for 30 minutes i did front kicks...omg my upper legs killed and my heart rate was up and i was tired but i sure as hell lasted for 3o minutes. Today i did the same thing but i also did some resistance stuff for my arm. i havent been using my left arm as much (it feels like a dead arm) so i did 50 reps with 2 x 500 grams of soup. Whilst i dont think i could do a full curves session at the moment i thought it was important to start to get strength up in my arm. I also last nite had the worst cravings for pizza...so instead of letting it building up n then having thick pizza with chocolate brownies and garlic bread etc...i ordered a thin style and pepsi max and then of course did my exercises after. Which i think was a really good way to deal with things. And even though i had the pizza i still feel like i can have a good loss this week. So with luck i will be under 150 kilos. weeeeeeeeeee which would be great and would also put me at a loss of 21 kilos or more...so we will see how it goes. But its funny now how its getting more in my mind about being healthy then just numbers on the scales. The fact i can do 30 minutes of exercise feels a real accomplishment in itself. I am even starting to think about what exercises in the future i wanna do. My exercise goal is when im under 100 kilos i wanna do dance classes again (just once or twice a week...modern dance or something) id also like to take some tennis lessons or play netball. Will depend by the time i get there and what i can work in with work hours.

BTW Airlie so good to find ur site again and ty so much about my 20 kilos loss =]

Okies off i go...oh and omg so sad jillian isnt on biggest loser still...lil spunkee thing she is and woooo hoooo kelly got eliminated !!!

My Virtual Model

Well the news is i lost...the other news is i didnt lose by lots. But i am happy. i mean a week ago i was thinking i couldnt do this after having a bad week where im sure i prolly put on half a kilo...so i lost 400 grams this week which i am pleased with. I have been waking this week with a sore shoulder and taking pain killers to get thru the day,,,but today i woke and its a lot worse (after using a heating pad) the pain is all down my arm and also my neck a lil so this afternoon im off to the docs (great way to spend a day off with this stinking heat) but i need to get it checked out...depending what he says i may not go to the gym this week...i may just do my exercises to biggest loser each day...and OMG did u see? a lesbian on biggest loser,,,,yay !! about time. LOL. Although i did read rumours that jillian is gay. She apparantly owns a gym in NY with another woman who is supposedly her partner...no wonder i thought jillian is spunky LOL that was my gaydar going off LOL but then again thats never been too accurate so who knows...okies off i go

OMG so hot today...gawd this heat is horrid ill be so glad for winter. Well tomorrow is it...weigh in day...hope it goes well my jeans feel looser so i need to remind myself even if the weigh in doesnt go as good as expected im sure when im measured again on the 28th. Its great how loose my jeans feel...and surprising cos i havent had any muscle pain in my lower half from the gym. Altho my upper half seems to be achey a lot LOL Okies just a quick post...wish me luck tomorrow - toodles !!!

omg another post who woulda thought it LOL im actually really pooped...i know ill sleep like a baby tonight but my posts are usually so rushed at work so thought id do one from home tonite.

I went to the gym...was nearly tempted not to go as i got off a call late from work and had to dash out to make the bus and omg this is the lamest excuse ever....but i was busting for the grrls room...yup u heard it right i was doing the PP dance LOL as i had a bbq to go to after the gym i was so tempted to go home...GO TO THE LOO and shower and change and go to the bbq...but i thought no im sure theres a toilet there...and yes of course there was LOL so then i did my workout and man i was pumping those machines...no twiddling my thumbs and my upper body and arms ache LOL by the time i finished and got changed i was feeling it and i was sweating. And in the middle of the circuit they have this table theres always signs and stuff on it well today as it was valentines day they had a selection of beaded bracelets, some were pink, some were blue and we got to keep one, anyway i grabbed this multiculour one...rather cute...see pic below lol





Then i went to mums for dinner...i went over my points by 3.5 points...but had earnt 8 points in exercise which i could use 4 of so i still have .5 left. So I ate turkey with baked potato and light sour cream and pasta and egg salad and 3 nuggets LOL

Was a nice dinner but by that point i was tired and just wanting to go home. On the ww site there are 3 of us very close in weight...we are having a lil competition to our next goal...BUT i may be in trouble depends on fridays weigh in...i really really hope it goes well...ill be disappointed if with all this exercise i dont lose a lil bit at least

Okies my bed is really calling me...hugssss ni ni all =]

Well last night didnt quite go to plan. I was home 5 minutes when the phone rang and mum was having problems with her nortons and as she has crappy nortons 2007 which im not familiar with i had to go around and in the end i had to uninstall it and reinstall it...and finally by this morning everything was done. But of course i was starving...and ended up having dinner over there which was far from points friendly...was sausages, chips, a egg, and these pastries filled with spinich and ricotta - eek. Well whats done is done...nothing i can do about it. Tonite i finish at 5.30pm and then off to the gym...mum invited me over for a bbq after which is chicken roll and salad...but i may not go...see how tired i am after the gym.

Everything else is going good...i noticed under my arms thru to my back so i KNOW i did work hard on monday like i mentioned the other day and i plan on working those machines hard again tonite. Then if i dont go to mums...a nice bowl of pasta.

Tania i forgot to mention in my email for belysimi's website address or however u spell her username LOL...if you see this can you send please :)

That book ive been reading has turned out very interesting,,,,he is going thru rehab for drug and alcohol abuse...and what does he fill the void of the addiction with? yep u guessed it --- food. While its not a book on weight loss really quite interesting to see that.

Okies just about lunchtime so off i go !

yay another good day and i still feel so psyched its amazing. Woke up and treated myself to a hot cross bun, and then in my first break ate a ww cake (has anyone tried these? yum yum) and a mandarin. Tonite I am planning on making tacos yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm and am off to curves tonite as well hopefully be home in time for biggest loser. I know everyone is saying its not healthy weight loss but seeing them working out etc really motivates me. Am reading a great new book...is called a million little pieces by james frey. Was a oprah book club book...and had a lot of controversy over whether it was all a true story or not...but ooooo its good...is about a guy who has a alcohol and drug addiction and he wakes up on a plane all injured after days of a drunken and drugged haze and his family meets him and takes him to a rehab clinic...im only up to page 81 but really really good sofar

I watched a episode of greys anatomy last nite...think i have a new show...LOL okies off i go...and gawd i hope courtney gets kicked off biggest loser tonite !!!!


LATER

Went to curves and as i walked in someone yelled out hello karyn...turned out it was this lady i used to work with in the bank...so ended up chatting to her a lil while working out. And omg i worked so hard i was really pumping those machines...then i raced home for biggest loser...lawd i didnt realise courtney had immunity...and poor alex going home...but he looks good with how much weight he has lost, and OMG i think i could have a crush on jillian,.....she is so damn spunky !

Okies off i go...lawdie im tired tonite

I am soooooo psyched right now. Went out to dinner with my mum & co...had a nice pasta then came home and raced inside for the biggest loser weigh ins (omg i was sooooo happy that courtney had the smallest loss and alex the highest loss on the red time...i hope to god they send courtney home tomorrow nite)Anyway so from8.15pm 8.42pm to be exact LOL i marched and did leg kicks and hip swings. I enjoyed it so much better then walking. The walking hurts the base of my feet. So thats 2 days in a row of exercise and tomorrow nite im off to curves weeeeeeeeeeeeeee maybe this friday i can have a good result. i feel really really good about things. Anyway gonna go eat my ww ice cream and guzzle some more water before going to bed to read for a bit (drank 1.8 litres yesterday !!)

Update ! Update !

Wellllllllllll went for my walk !!! and it didnt take me 40 minutes....did it in 20 minutes ! i walked at a real solid pace no dawdling and my feet hurt but i did it LOL...and thats it...i am going to exercise everyday this week. Then i FINALLY bought my new handbag...and went to the hairdressers LOL my hair colour is even lighter now and next time...she is gonna blonde all my hair lol omg ill have the perfect excuse for all the dumb shit i do....but im blonde !! LOL

Anyway came home....and retried on the jeans i bought from katies at xmas that i couldnt get over my ass and wooo hooo they not only fit over my ass... they do up !!! i think this was just the boost i need. im tossing up whether to go to the movies or not...that movie isnt on till the 14th gawd im duh sometimes..but dreamgirls is on...but then i bought this new book i wouldnt mind reading...decisions decisions !

Thats it !!!

Well thats it ! No more fart assing around...not attending a meeting is just a lame excuse to eat a bit extra. i didnt go to the meeting...i woke up late...feeling like a sloth...and then thought well ill go to the gym..but i fart assed around so much i didnt make that either. Its 12.15 now...and im just cooking a chicken fillet which ill have in a hamburger roll with low fat cheese and tomato for lunch and then with water bottle in hand i am walking from my house to sefton park shopping centre, ive never walked it before and im guessing its a 40 minute walk...by the time i get up there i will then go look for a damn handbag then off to the hairdressers. And heres the deal...i do the walk...i can shout myself out to dinner at fellinis and to see a movie...if i dont...its stay at home and do house work. i cannot even believe i was starting to get into the mindset of throwing this all away. By lunch i will have eat 11.5 points,,,,leaving me with a possible 15.5 points...so a nice dinner at fellinis is completely do able and still have points left over.

Claudia - thank you for the nice comments you left on one of my posts a couple of posts ago and tania...yes yes gotta catch up again soon. I will email you tonite or tomorrow. And thanks to tania and my sister for sending me messages after yesterdays post...but never fear today is a new day !!! LOL okies the chicken fillet should be cooked...off i go...hugsssss all !!

well im not doing so great with my journey right at the moment, i havent been really bad or anything but have been eating more carbs then i should have. And when i got thinking about it i remembered back a few years ago when i lost 25-30 kilos...and then stalled after 6 months...and what do u know? im at 6 months...as exactly 6 months yesterday and my loss is sitting at 20.1 kilos...so i feel like this could be a real telling time for me...i think also not having gone to a meeting this week has really done me damage .... makes me realise how important those meetings are. So tonite after work i will go and grocery shop...i think part of the problem is i had run out of fresh fruit and so had no bananas or mandarisn which i normally eat for my snacks. And tomorrow morning i am going out to norwood for a meeting and weigh in...on the way back ill stop off in town and buy a new handbag which i desperately need and then come home before going off to the hairdressers in the afternoon. Which is gonna mean i wont make the gym...but i really feel this meeting is important. Tomorrow i will go for a 30 minute walk too tho at some point. Anyway i felt it was really important to get this all down in words.

Popped over to tanias journal today...so good seeing you so motivated !!! Was great to read and i think that can really rub off on to me.

Okies off i go work is busy busy busy !!!

well of to curves i went today. Was rather good...i went at like 9.30am so was pretty quiet when i started was only me there and by the end only 2 other ladies. I really enjoy it tho its hard and tiring. I really push myself tho altho the last 10 minutes i find my muscles feel really tired. Tomorrow i work 10.30am-6.30pm so i wont make it there but i will try and go for a walk tomorrow nite. Then i have the weekend off...YAY !!!

Saturday is kinda busy...go to the gym, do the grocery shopping. I need to buy a new handbag as mine broke, theres this gorgeous shop near where i live that sells handbags but they are like $90 each but they have 25% off so i mite go there and see if there is one i really like. Sunday will be cleaning and relaxing. Dymocks just emailed me that a book i ordered is in so mite be a bit of reading time. Then next week i work 9.30-5.30 most days.

I am loving biggest loser altho i didnt see it the last few days cos of work. i thought sarah was in denial all along...and a big ole baby...i mean crying cos someone else is having a hard workout??? lawdie...i could understand if it was her having the hard workout LOL i like damien tho and hope he goes far....he has so much he could gain from this.

Okies break is nearly over...time to get back on the phones !

lawd been a while since ive updated.

Actually been sick this week...i hadnt had TOM for like 3 months and well it came back and boi did it come back. Ive had the worse stomach & back aches since monday but today seems a lot better and i am back at work.

Have actually come to a conclusion...and that is im removing chat programs from my computer. I have slowly become more and more bored in them...till i realised today i sit in them but i dont pay attention half the time...instead im in my browser reading the news website or ww forum, and they are really counter productive to my weight loss. My free time should not revolve around a computer. Thats not to say i wont ever go back but at the moment i feel like i need a break. And i will see how things go i may even cancel my dsl there is really no point to it when work gives me 100 free hours per month on dial up if im not gonna be online much.

I went to curves on saturday and really enjoyed it...and tomorrow ill go back and again saturday. I didnt weigh this week cos of my gawd damn awful roster...but im not too concerned as im really motivated at the moment and expect the first few weeks at curves to gain muscle. But i will weigh in again next wednesday.

This weekend i am having the foils done again in my hair and a trim yay yay and saturday night i mite go to the movies to see the new drew barrymore movie...okies we are busy busy at work so gotta dash =]

Well things been happening again LOL I applied for a new job in the company I work for yesterday. After i finish work today i am going up to the departtment its in, to meet the manager and to look around and to listen to some calls =] Then after that i am off to curves to do a session. This weekend im not doing a lot...saturday morning i will go to curves and its nice to have a bit of free time to clean and do washing and saturday nite i mite watch a movie -ooops gotta move puters bbl

Okies quick post...was surfing around in you tube and i found this video clip...now most know i LOVE gilmore gurls...but this song is song by one of my fave singers...brad paisley so i had to post it :)

Okies...firs thing if anyone has problems accessing or reading my journal please email me as they changed it to their new blogger system.

well i went to my first session at curves yesterday...and i think i could get addicted to it ! omg yes the non gym junkie said that !!! I did the whole program (except one machine due to the sore ankles i have) and when i was doing the stretching at the end i got dizzy and was not well for about 45 minutes...but duh me after i realised i hadnt eaten for the 3 hours prior and didnt drink any water while doing it . But then when i woke today i thought oh i wanna go back today ! but alas no clean gym clothes...so will have to wait till friday. Its very kewl there system shows you how many sessions you have done...when ur next weigh and measure day is . So my weigh and measure day is the 29th of each month, ao by next one i want to have done 12 sessions - at least. they also told me not to worry about the scales too much in the first month...but hopefully ill still have losses each week altho i realise ill be putting on muscle...

Off to dinner with tania tonite =]

Oh and i slept MUCH better last nite,,,,fell asleep just before 8.30pm and slept till 3.30am didnt wake up once then i fell back asleep for another hour a half...so things are getting better with the sleeping pattern....ok off i go !

Well omg lots to tell !

Firstly ---- i HATE graveyard shifts !!! 3 days later and my sleeping pattern is still up the creek. But its 7.30pm and im still awake !!! ive literally been like a zombie and so tired to the point of aching eyes and feeling sick...hopefully ill sleep good tonite and be back to normal tomorrow.

Now...yanno one of my goals for this year was to get my social life going and ive done a few things to assist with that =] a old friend of mine from school who is still single too who ive known for like 22 years or something who i lost contact with about 5 years ago...well i rang her yesterday...we talked for a bit then she called back tonite and she is coming over thursday nite =] Then also the gay n lesbian festival (feast) i applied to do volunteer work for...wrote to me and said i was accepted and just need to wait for details on the orientation =] So another big step !!

After much debate i went and checked out curves today and joined ! $49 a month (much better then the $86 a fortnite the other gym was charging) and this is a lot more convenient. I am going there tomorrow for my first full session. I did try some of their machines out today. And we set goals for my birthday to lose 172 cm, be a size 18 and lose 40.8 kilos. im wrapped !

And for the next news...i lost 1.6 kilos !!!!!!! I am now back over 20 kilos...20.1 kilos to be exact. Amazing to thing since january 5 i have lost 5.2 kilos. Okies off to eat my chicken n sundried tomato pasta have a good week all !!!!

Well...was sitting down watching a episode of oprah today i recorded that got me really thinking. It was about women who had let themselves go...due to either a bad relationship or whatever. And Oprah asked the question to look at photos from 10-15 years ago....and it really got me thinking to how my life is different. I mean 20 years ago i was 19. I was out socially a lot about a size 16 and living on fast food. Until i was about 25 i went out nightclubbing a lot...but i guess i could see the start of bad habits now...sleeping during the day...up all night...then at 21 i joined the bank...i had a couple of relationships at this time 9with guys no less !) One was luke he was in the navy and another was a off and on situation with a guy i had known since i was 15 whose name was ray. Anyway during that time i knew i liked gurls...i simply didnt focus on it. I remember times where family members would say stuff like "when are you going to be married?"...okies heres a tip...dont ask people that !!! What on earth does anyone get out of that question - especially if the person is single. all it does is make the person your asking feel inadequate...when i came out and that question stopped being asked was one of the biggest reliefs for me. When i was 29 i bought my first computer - buying a computer ive always viewed as being a negative and a positive thing for me. I obviously have a addictive personality which i know via my relationship with food....when i bought the computer a few months after i ran across this chat program called virtual places...and in it ran across a "grrls domain" room....i loved this room. It was full of bi girls and lesbians. Suddenly the fact that i didnt have a boyfriend was not a issue...i just got to talk to people who i could relate to which i loved but being my personality is addictive at that time i spent way too much time in it...even giving up work so i could be online more (not wise to do when you have a mortgage) so whilst the computer enabled me to really just be "me" and not have to fit into anyones mould i also became addicted to it. I was heavily addicted up till about 3 1/2 years ago. Now dont get me wrong i still enjoy chat but its not my "life" and i know want my "real" life more then ever. i am at this stage in my life of being very focussed on me...i want to get healthy...and really do this program 110%. I still go in most days to chat and play backgammon while watching tv...it has some advantages it distracts me from food and temptations. But im not there 8 hours a day or nothing. Sometimes on my days off i may sit there for a chunk of a day lol and oprahs show today really ingrained in me that i dont want to be letting myself go no more. She is doing step by step shows on this so im gonna keep watching...and keep working on things.

And tonite is the last nite of graves !!! YAY yay yay so glad...only another 6 hours and then i got 3 days off woooooo hoooooooo

Well today has been challenging !

I woke up at 6am (having only slept 6 hours) feeling completely draining and exhaused. I lay in bed contemplating on what to have for dinner...the cupboards were bare and the thought of KFC was tempting...after umming and ahhing for half an hour i thought bugger it...got dressed ... drank a superdyn drink and went out and did my grocery shopping ! And omg did i shop...$190 later !!! And i shopped differently....firstly i decided i will make some home made pita bread pizzas cos i can add lots of vegetables like mushrooms, capsicum, onion and pineapple etc to them. i bought a roasted chicken (which ill remove the skin from), fat free semi sundried tomato, fetta cheese and real pizza sauce. Along with the vegetables for them. I then also bought some veal, beef pieces and chicken breast and THEN i bought carrots, mushies, capsicum, onion, potato, green beans, mandarins, bananas, cherry tomatos, lettuce, onions, strawberries and salad onions !! LOL who woulda believed it??? And so far today ive had a mandarin and a banana. My lunch had pieces of asparagus in them and surprise surprise i didnt mind them...so i think i will buy some and next time i make my low fat cream pasta sauce i will try and add aspragus to it. Hopefully when i get home from work i wont be too tired to prepare the pizzas. So i really feel proud of todays decisions and i feel more focusse and today i WILL get off the bus one bus stop early.

When i get home i gonna make ww bacon and a egg on toast i think mmm mmmm thats only 4.5 points altogether =]

Oh yeah and im going back to tracking...the last month or so i jsut feel like ive been playing around with this weight loss ... time to get serious and really start to tackle this weight loss. Ill also be weighing in next monday night !! Okies im off all !!!

Well last nite was beyond boring it ended up over 3 hours between calls and one point and i really struggled at about 4am-ish to stay awake. So tonite i bought in my laptop...ive loaded the sims game and gonna play that later. When i went home after last nite i was online and decided to go looking more at the pinksofa website (the website for women i mentioned a while ago i was a member of) ... anyway ended up finding this link for a SA lesbian site...its called Lesbian Tribune and is awesome with so much info. Well i eventually looked at the feast website...(feast is the "queer" festival held in November in Adelaide each year) and i eventually filled out a form to volunteer for it. Anyway we will wait and see if i hear anything from it.

I slept for about 6 hours tonite...till i woke up all hot,,,blah shoulda put the a/c on before i went to bed.

Food wise was under points by 1.5 points...yay me !!!

Okies off i go...enjoy your tuesday all !

OMG its cold. Its 3.09am and i am at work. Last nite i bought a jacket and didnt wear it so i didnt bother bringing it tonite,,,,well they got the a/c on or some chit and im freezing. i so just wanna curl up under a blanket and get cozy.

These graves shifts (11.30pm-7.30am) are not too bad at all. They are really quiet...tonite more so then last nite (i havent taken a phone call for a hour and a half) so ive been browsing the net and just chatting. When i went home last nite i stayed up till just after 9am and then went to sleep and slept thru till 3.15pm. Its a lil hard cos you try and go to sleep and its light i9n the room. I ahve wooden venetians so they are pretty good at blocking out the sunlight but not great. Tonite before i came in i went into my bedroom at 9pm to try and nap and it was sooooo dark in the room and my only thought was i cannot wait till the graves are over and i can go to sleep when its dark for a full nite. I am a lil tired today but not too bad considering...but tomorrow is day 3....nearly hump day !!!

Yesterday food wise with this time change really thru me i was nibbling food all day...admittedly healthy food but i still woulda gone over points and in a email to tania i said i was thinking about core. Well surprise surprise i have changed my mind about this ! LOL But i have done some rethinking. For this week my aim is simply to get thru to saturday without being too sleep deprived. Today (midnight sat nite to midnite sunday nite...even with going out for dinner where i had limited choice i still had 2 points left over (yay me) But come saturday i am going shopping and going to shop a lil difference. I think partly ive got a bit bored with the food but also i think i need to eat some vegetables to help keep me full and to avoid picking between meals. So i found a recipe for beef and red wine casserole recipe which is obviously a casserole with mushrooms in it so will make that on the weekend. im also planning to make vegetable soup (which i will blend a bit so i dont get any nasty chunky vegetable bits blah) and also...beans is something i dont mind...so will make a low fat cheese sauce and pour over them and have a few times. Doing this all should build up my energy levels even more as well. So this is the plan of attack for the next few weeks. I was gonna get of the bus one stop early today going home and walk but im too tired i think so i will tackle that next week when im not sleep deprived.

And isnt it funny thru friendships u make thru ww or their site or whatever how they encourage u? Tania emailed me today said she had updated her journal...and so i went over for a peak on their and she mentioned how my motivation motivates her...and then her comment was kinda like...hell yeh shes right...i have done good...but time to step it up a gear.

okies not much else to say - hope everyone has a good week =]

well this 3 days off thing is going well... :) yesterday i went and got my new puter. Its a laptop and gorgeousssssssssssssss 120GB HD, 1GB ram, a core duo processor, widescreen witht eh new viiv thing (that was for any techie heads LOL) anyway its great so slim i love it. ive never had a dvd burner before and i have to burn the back up for it...so need to go buy some blank dvds.

On to ww....weighed in and lost 600 grams taking me now to a total loss of 18.5 which i am really happy with. i mean remember not only should u aim to lose 500 grams to a kilo per week for it to be healthy weight loss....i also went out to mexican and had michaels bbq (where i drank 5 shots of zambucca lol) more important then the big losses in my mind is more consistency, and plus as i am being more socially active these things will occur. Tomorrow nite i start graves i think i have that all sussed and planned out and the plan this week is to really focus on my water and to get of the bus one stop early on the way home.

okies off i go to enjoy my day off :)

elloz all...yay last day and then 2 days off and then tomorrowwwwwwwww im going shopping for a new puter. My poor lil lap top is really struggling of late...if the day is too hot it cant stay on. Its a purchase ive regretted for a long time...it obviously doesnt have a sufficient cooling system. So tomorrow i am off to look at desk tops. Im getting it on a rent to buy plan and the plan is to really chug the money into it and then soon as its paid off get a new lounge suite. So thats this years plan LOL

Food wise been good .... was under points by about 3 points yesterday. And like i said the other day am noticing some difference in my clothes =]

Okies off i go !!

Well last night all went good !!! Was a fun nite and i didnt eat TOO badly - hell it was mexican remember ! We had nachos which we all shared (yum yum yummmmmmmmmmm) and then i had what was prolly one of the small dinners...a thin bread thingy with chicken and tomato in it, a beef taco and a rice with carrots n corn in it (and i ate half the rice ! ) i also had one glass of wine...i prolly went over by 2 or 3 points i reckon as i had 14 points to use. AND when i went to get ready i thought oh ill wear one of the new tops i bought at katies. One was a black top which fitted me perfectly 2 weeks ago and one was a green top which was too tight...WELL the black top is too big...so big acrosss my top half its not wearable...so onto ebay it will have to go. Then i thought well ill try the green top on and it fits ! its firm fitting but really quite nice (i took a photo ill upload it tomorrow maybe) then today when getting dressed i was putting on my new t shirt from katies...which has really been fitting me nicely but i noticed its got a bit of room to spare around my hips ! so yay yay yay.

Okies off to do some work...have a good monday all - only 2 more days and a weekend for me - yay !!!

well i didnt end up going for a walk last nite. But i really need to get my act together with walking. The thing that always puts me off is that ive seen friend start exercising and their weight either stalls or they gain...i had one friend really struggle for quite a long time after joining curves and i know at this point getting those kilos knocked off is really important. i am the type who can give up easily and if i start gaining or losing very little cos of exercise i quite possibly would think ... i give up.

But food wise things are going good. I ended up a couple of points under yesterday. Tonight i am going out for mexican. i have 15 points saved. So no desserts or anything...but i will simply choose a nice meal and enjoy seeing everyone. So i finish work at 5.30 pm and dont start work till 2.30pm tomorrow which is really nice.

Maybe i will go for a walk in the morning...then again maybe not LOL...

okies off i go

Have i mentioned one day weekends suck? LOL....well they do....had jsut yesterday off and now i am back at work again for 5 days before i get a few days off.

Came very prepared today bought a wrap with chicken, low fat cheese and low fat mayo for lunch. yumm yumm - 18 minutes and i can go make it...and after having that will have only eaten 11 points for the day (and im prolly over counting some points) which leaves me 16 points, and for dinner i am having a chicken schnitzel with oven fries. I think tonite too i may go out for a walk...i say this a lot but rarely do LOL

Tania made a comment on yesterdays post...that i seem happy...and guess what???? shes right !!! lol i just am at a very happy place at the moment. i hate the one day weekends but am really enjoying the rotating roster...ive lost 17.9 kilos now so back on track...im starting to go out a bit more (which was the plan for 2007) and i think a big thing is that im not in chat as much. So things are good good good !!!!

Tania i did email you about catching up...so either reply when you get a chance or leave me a message on msn and jaxx your right....some gay guys are really as sweet as hell.

okies off to make my lunch have a good saturday all !!!

well i owe a post eh? LOL my sister emailed me saying....howd u go today LOL so a post must be overdue.

Well last nights bbq was sooooooooooo much fun ! Michael had lots of healthy food (altho i did pick at some cc's lol) He had marinated bite size pieces of chicken in soya sauce, ginger and lime and cooked it on the bbq - which is what i mostly ate. He also had porterhouse steak but i didnt eat that. and entree type thing he had stir fryed prawns with i think it was chilli sauce and tiny meatballs. And then he had 3 healthy salads and i filled my plate up with that. After i also had a christmas mince pie. As this was our christmas function we had secret santa too. Which was quite funny. For mine...and this was so cute....cos....for those who dont know my nickname at work is "princess" i sign my internal emails princess lol and msot people call me it. Well i got a mobile phone sock which is pink and says on it "call me princess" a pink beanie doll that says "princess" and a stationary set...of a note book, pencil cup holder, memo pad and pencil case...and they are all covered in soft pink material with the word .... you guessed it "princess" on it LOL im taking them all in to work tomorrow for on my desk. Then after most had left...there were 5 left and michael starts pouring shots of zambucca and is like c'mon you need to have one...well okies...one turned into 4 or 5 LOL so was a really good nite and michaels brother ended up giving me a lift home...came home tipsy went online played in a tourney and won it ! LOL (so yes tania one or two drinks LOL - you know me too well)

Anyways onto other news......i lost 3 kilos !!! wooooooot !!!!! so my loss is now back at 17.9 kilos....so very very happy. Oh and at the bbq one of the bois came up to me and whispered in my ear "you've lost weight" lol hes such a sweetheart .... in my team....im the only lesbian but we have 4 gay bois and every one of them is sweet as anything...so was real sweet of him !

Okies off i go !!! Will be back in a few days with a new update !

Well only a hour then we finish work and head off to Michaels for the barbeque. its actually our team function for xmas...we are doing secret santa n all. Ive been very good i have about 7 points saved this week...plus 14.5 points left for the day anyway. Michael just left to make salads and he is pretty healthy so im sure there will be lots of salads. But im not gonna stress...im gonna take pepsi max and drink that...and i will most likely just eat chicken and salad. Then of course tomorrow morning i have my weigh in...and then after that i will go do the grocery shopping then off home to play gammon in the afternoon...and then tomorrow nite i will finish watching the move the break up.

Was up bright n early again today...6am....and i didnt leave for work till 8.20am...i am really starting to enjoy that time in the morning.

Okies will be back tomorrow nite sometime with my weigh in result - fingers crossed!

Well day 6 and i been really good...very focussed. Came in to work today a bit early and one of the girls was taking a call but the customer was yelling at her and so this girl got upset and started crying so i took over the call half an hour before i was suppose to start work. So i get to leave half an hour earlier tonite AND sarah the gurl bought me a hot chocolate LOL

im loving being home in my evenings again o0oooooooo and i think i won some money (prolly $5 with my luck LOL) u did that tv trivia competition with my foxtel tv1 last nite and i answered all 10 questions correctly so supposedly you share in $1000 depends how mnay other people got 10 right. Apparantly they write to you within 21 days with a cheque to let you know what you won.

Well done jaxx on your loss !!! yay u !!!

Tomorrow night is the bbq at michaels...im gonna take my bottled water and eat chicken and salad and be super good...and hopefully have a great weigh in on friday morning! Will be back after that with the weigh in result!

On the weight watchers 30+ kilos to lose forum they do a "i am so proud today because..." thread...its a great thread cos you get thinking about what you did to help your weightloss...makes you think about yourself a bit but also great to see other peoples responses.

Anyway went out to lunch with Tania yesterday to a lil restuarant in melbourne street...we off course shared a serve of bruschette (can't imagine going out for a meal with tania where bruschetta wasnt included lol) and then i had pasta with a pollo sauce (rose sauce with chicken) was very yummy !!!! And of course great company. I always enjoy my lunches with Tania or even our chats in msn cos they generally revolve around our weight loss journey but like me tania looks at the other ways it effects our lives too...like we were discussing yesterday about treating ourselves more to enhance our self image (like facials, nice clothes etc) but i love that and i think it is really important cos losing numbers on the scales is really only part of this journey. Most people when they put on weight hibernate and hide from the world so i truly think getting a social life is also a really important part, and all the other things that play into this and have run off effects into my work life, family etc etc

And tania yes yes about msn LOL and jaxx? can you add me to msn? my email addy for it is lesbian.princess@hotmail.com

Was talking to Tania the other nite on msn and she said,,,,,whenever my weight loss is going good everything else around me goes good too. And i have to agree with her....this week i work 9 out of 10 days...and normally id be dreading it and thinking i dont want tomorrow to come. But instead im looking forward to things...today i am heading out to lunch with Tania,,,,when i come home ill do some laundry and then i think ill watch breaking up with jennifer annsiton (mmmm) on foxtel. Then i will be good the next 4 days and look forward to the bbq at michaels on thursday night. Where i am gonna be very good and simply try and have a good night and not focus on food. There should be plenty of healthy foods....and i simply wont drink. i really am determined for a good loss when i weigh in on friday. im still getting these damn sinus headaches...around the eyes...theyre a damn pain in the ass i swear...

i am so blonde today i swear the proxide they put on my hair is seeping into my brain. i been playing some gammon and saying the most stupid things...i swear LOL

okies off i go for my sunday...enjoy all =]

piwell gawd what a day ! Worked till 9pm last nite...went home and ended up talking to Tania on msn messenger till a lil after 11.15pm...went to bed....and watched a lil dave letterman and then lo n behaold woke up at 5am!!!! and could not get back to sleep. By 10 to 6 i gave up and got up and mixed up a ww chocolate mousse and played a couple of gammon tourneys before heading off to medicare & ww. WELL!!! i did things a lil differently...i ate breakfast and a can of diet coke before i went...wore jeans and heavier shoes and needed to go to the loo !!! LOL and had a HUGE gain of 5.4 kilos...i was incredibly jacked but i also expected it and i was so glad that i had already decided to stay for the meeting. Which i am glad about as im sure it gave me extra motivation. ive been spot on today and for when i go home i have a ww choc mousse and i will slice up a banana and throw those pieces in and have a yummy snack before bed (my head is pounding)

Tomorrow i have a lazy day...cleaning...some gammon...prolly catch up on some of my tv shows ive recorded (scrubs my latest show im liking) and then a walk in the evening. Sunday i am off to lunch with tania where i KNOW we both will be good...(altho a lil bruschetta of course will come our way) i have a few social things on this week...a bbq at my TLs house thursday nite (which will be challenging but my weigh in next morning so ill be good) and then the sunday night i am going out for mexican - eek !!!

okies will finish this from home....

well im home...i have a horrid headache...and its worse when i lean forward...so i think its either cos ive cut back on my food...or its related to the sinusitis...im gonna have my banana n chocolate mousse in a minute then toddle off to bed and get some decent sleep. Anyone knows of good healthy choices for mexican that does NOT have beans in it...please lemme know LOL

okies im off have a good nite all =]

omg how cute n adorable is this layout??? i love it !!!!

well its amazing how bad food affects you. i havent been sick for 5 months. Anyway monday i felt off colour...and tuesday when i woke my left cheek was killing me. Went to the docs and turned out i had acute sinusitis...but after now 5 doses of antibiotics i am starting to feel back to normal again (also ive eaten better the last few days) Anyway i just cleaned out the fridge...its defrosting at the moment. Before work i will do a fresh grocery shop and friday before work i will go to weight watchers and weigh in and face D day LOL

Amazing how much better i feel tonight...like my normal self have been so lethargic it was horrid. Tomorrow i will walk up to the shops which ive never walked before...hmmmm guess would be 40 minutes. Then im gonna start walking for 30 minutes each day....i really wanna boost this weight loss along.

I did rejoin pink sofa...and a gurl messaged me the other day...that they (her and her gf) are organising social functions....a dinner in a few weeks time...so presuming i am not working i am gonna go.

Okies think thats all...have a good day all =]


kazz =]

Happy new year all !!!

OMG so long since i posted...ive been off work since the 22nd but go back to work tomorrow.....im really not too sad...i need my routine again. Christmas was great, my sis her hubby and their kids came down. Which was great. My lil niece is 2 1/2 and at the cuddly stage...she just wants to sit on ur lap (albeit by running and jumping onto it lol) and show ya her dollhouse n stuff shes veryyyyyyyy adorable !! The boys are getting older and so getting more into their own interests...but was really good seeing them all. We played uno quite a bit...made for some fun. i also went to the movies !! first time for several years. Went with my sis and their kids to see happy feet...very cute movie.

But of course food wise i was bad LOL. i am sure ive put on 3-4 kilos. but i go back on wednesday lunchtime. theyve moved my meeting so this week i will go on wednesday in town before work...and then next week well we will see where LOL

it was funnny how i noticed how quickly the bad food made me feel. pimples and feeling dehydrated. And some foods i use to love i discoverred i dont even like so much anymore. i use to love grilled cheese on crumpets...now i really dont like it...same with microwave popcorn neither i enjoyed. But anyway i will weigh in on wednesday and get back on track.

i went to katies last friday...they were having a 50% sale. i bought quite a few new clothes...quite a lot are too tight but another 5-10 kilos and they should fit me. And one casual top and one going out top fits me already, so i have clothes to wear again. In fact i have added a photo of one of my new tops this was taken on saturday

Well with a big sigh of relief im happy to say i made 20 kilos !!! yay !!! So happy and relieved. So now i have 3 new goals. by January 2 id like to lose 700 grams...by march 29 lost 10 kilos and by nieces birthday in july another 10 kilos !!!! okies ill be back later to post more - in the middle of a backgammon tournament lol

oh yes nearly forgot...i lost1.3 kilos...so total loss now of 20.3 kilos =]

Well 3 days to go till next weigh in...i really havent focussed on it as much this week. My friend emmy messaged me on msn yesterday and was saying i hope you make the 20 kilos this week and as i said to her....right at the moment i just want a loss...but i do feel a lil confident of meeting it too.

I have realised while i have lost a lot of weight from my face and and upper body...i havent lose as much as i would have liked from my hips, stomach and upper legs, which makes me realise clothing size wise i was probably a lot bigger size then i realise (i suspect 2 kilos now) and what im finding is that tops that fit me around my hips and hugeeeee around my boobs ugh !!!! Which is a pain. I bought this pretty a line top...fitted me on the hips but was huge up top and cos it was sleeveless and the arm holes relatively big when i wear it anyone standing side on could see directly inder the top and see my bra n stuff lol so thats not a good look....so back to target that goes.I also bought 2 pairs of 3/4 jeans...neither fit me and i got 2 different sizes so the bigger size ill keep but the smaller size i will return...damn pain in the butt. I suspect by the time i lose another 10-15 kilos things may be better. So im not gonna worry about new clothes at the moment....i will get by with what i have and then right before i go to the gold coast (in march) i will then buy a few new outfits.

im working today...started at 8am and am sleepy. Cos i am acting team leader these 4 days the staff have to call me if any are sick, a hour befor their shift. So someone who started at 7.30am today called in sick...so my damn mobile was beeping away at 6.30am !!! so the last hour or so of my sleep was disrupted.

But another 90 minutes i will be off home for a nice relaxing evening, and tomorrow i dont start till 9.30am which is a much more civilised time to be starting.

i worked on my resume today. There is a part of me that thinks i should look out for other jobs. i dont think this job as it is now will exist forever...and in one sense i think i should try and get another job before i get much older...but another part of me thinks...no way till you reach your long service leave (which is in may 2008) and then another part of me says wait till your all slim n trim and then try. Which im sure id have more luck getting a good job when slim. That or look for a job with my current company. i really have found i like working day shift...so the temptation to find a 9-5 job is really there.

okies not much else to say...have a good weekend all !

Well christmas really is close eh? i realised how close today when tania emailed me to figure out a date to catch up over xmas/new years. i have only 6 working days left wooo hooo then i got 10 days off. Last day i work is the 22nd and thats the day my sis and her hubby and kids arrive in Adelaide. Havent seen them since ummm july i guess? Anyway very much looking forward to them, the way its turning out it will be a nice relaxing but people filled break i will have - and this is all a good thing...my sis and the kids are down to the 26th...hopefully catch up with tania i also have a work dinner...the aim is to lose another 2.7 kilos when i weigh in on january 1, which is do able...i am still gonna weigh in over xmas. This week coming i will go to the morning tuesday meeting...i love those meetings all the staff their are lovely and this week as its my day off ill stay for the meeting, the following week ill pop in to Adelaide and weigh in on the wednesday.

I had a lot of comments about yesterdays post so thank you all who replied...im still mulling it all over in my head i think LOL i actually decided this week i will join pink sofa maybe meet some adelaide gurls i could at least catch up with for coffee etc.

Okies thats enuff for today i think !

Okies well i think this may to a degree be a lengthy post....so be warned...

Last night I got thinking, and was wondering to myself "what defines me"....i came to the conclusion that there are 3 prominant things...being a lesbian, being single and being overweight. And then i started to wonder how these all relate. You know ive read and watched dr phil and oprah and others saying whats the reasoning behind over eating...i always thought well hell its cos the food tastes good ! But im now starting to realise for me its not cos of that...being excessively overweight takes the question of "when will you settle down/marry/have a partner" etc out of the equation...when someone is single and weighs 170 kilos other people are not going to wonder if they have a partner its highly unlikely they do...and being single and excessively overweight and no one expecting you to have a partner in some ways makes it easy. i get comfortable...there isnt that expectation...or questioning (altho my parents questioning me on this pretty much stopped when i came out lol), it was funny the other day Michael was doing my 6 monthly review and i guess he can tell im happier and healthier and he said "have you met someone" then he kinda apologised and said...i just wonder cos when someone is with someone they get happier in all parts of their life. And i thought at the time wow thats the first time in a longggggg time anyways asked me that...and i guess to a degree when someone asks it in the past ive felt like a failure cos i am single. But starting today thats gonna change...im gonna embrace being single at the moment because that is NOT how its going to be forever. Right now is a great time for me to be focusing on me...my health...my weight loss...and slowly getting a social life back. But one of the goals of this year is to hopefully have gone out on a few dates by the end of the year. i think its important i do this not only cos a relationship is a part of living...but also cos i really need to get out and meet people and do more things then work, eat and sleep, which i am slowly starting to do. i think i went off on a quandry but its all part of the same deal. Anyway this week i will rejoin the pink sofa...its a online australian website for lesbians and bi women...

On to other things gained 200 grams :(

Also bought some britney spears perfume and new fiorelli wallet set with my wishlist points !

wow not even 9am and i have been up for over 3 hours !!!! who would ever have thought it ! lol it was so warm here last nite...my room was kinda warm too...anyway woke up before 6...got up went on line for a bit and had my breakfast, and now at a minute to 9am the second load of washing is on....dishes are in the sink rinsing...im running ar0und with a honey mask on my face lol...and the kitchen tidy cleaned out...you think i may be getting TOO used to these day shifts? lol i must admit it feels good to be getting so many things done so early in the day. The puter is going to my friend Daves place in the next week or two (possibly tuesday) its been over heating a lot so i suspect the fans have dust on them...same thing happened last year so ill get him to clean them out and do a reformat for me...(gotta love having friends who are computer geeks !) and he said he will get it all done in one night and i told him i will get him a 6pak of beer for doing it for me. So the more i think about it the more i will try and get it done tuesday night. Hopefully i get to play some gammon today...im rarely online when the gammon games are lately...but day off today so hopefully be a few games today and seeing its 41 today no way in hell im going outside

Okies have a good saturday all !

Well today has started off good ! Was gettiing dressed for work this morning and when i put my top on (the one i wear in the progress photos) i thought to myself hmmm feels a lil looser then it did on monday. Then as i was getting on the bus i thought my jeans were about to fall down LOL was a very nice feeling to think they are getting so big and gives me some confidence about monday nights weigh in, but i really need some new jeans LOL...oh well this week i will go shopping for some more. So anyway thats all i wanted to say lol have a good day all !

Well...i think this week...im gonna kick ass. I have been spot on since monday...and havent eaten anything but fruit after dinner (infact last nite had dinner at 7.30pm and didnt eat a thing after it!) i soooooooooooo want to reach 20 kilos this week which i fully expect and i guess in the back of my mind i know if i lose 1.8 kilos i would be under 150 kilos to which is in the back of my mind. Not that i really expect to reach under 150 kilos this week...that will prolly be the week after but would be so nice to reach both of these goals by christmas day. Tonite i am cooking chicken cordon bleu from the butchers with birds eyes oven fries (which are only 2 points for 100 grams) Ive eaten light today so i could have this treat. I love cordon bleu.

Did the kids xmas shopping on the weekend. I keep checking my nieces bratz gurl doll out i bought her lol shes a trendy little thing...and its a princess one - of course ! she has blonde hair which is kinda multiple tones lol reminds me a lil of my hair hahahahahha

Its amazing how this week i seem sooooooooo much more motivated. i think it has a lot to do with my shift at work. i love walking out of work with the sun still out n shining as its been lately. Today i finish in 40 minutes at 5.30pm but tomorrow i finish at 3.30pm ! Will be very nice. I can go home do some stuff at home and then head up to the shops at dinner time so i can have my normal "grocery shopping treat" which is a yiros yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Okies nearly time to heard home....have a good night everyone !!!!

Hey all ! Just a quick update before i go settle down for a bit of tv viewing before a early nite. I lost 800 grams tonite wooo hooo so that takes me down to 151.7 and a total loss of 19.2 kilos. I have decided this week no eating after dinner unless its fruit ... so we will see if i can stick to it....id really like to hit that 20 kilos next week. Not a lot else is going....2 1/2 weeks till im on leave....yay....okies off i go....hope you had a good loss this week Tania. Oh and im gonna say something that will shock anyone who knows me - i loveeeeeeee day shift better then evenings - hahahhah who woulda thought it?

Photo Update

Okies super quick update cos my dinner is cooking. Things here are great ! Had my hair cut and coloured today fitted in the hairdressers chairs fine - another step to normality! And heres some pics....the first 2 pics are from today the last 2 are the one in my red top from 1/10/06 and the other from april !

This one is a closeup of my face and i can actually start to see cheek bones ! The blonde streaks are randomly thruout my hair and its much shorter altho still well below my shoulders...i actually really like this picture !

Okies this is taken today and i can see the difference... i think if you click on it the actual size shows and its more obvious then

This one vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv (below) was taking on 1st october maybe tomorrow i will take a closer shot

This one vvvvvvvvvvvvvv (below) was taking prior to weight watchers in april - blah !@

Well elloz all =]

Its so warm here today ! I wish i could sit outside and read my book and enjoy it but unfortunately i am working both days this weekend =[

Things are going good altho i went over my points yesterday and noticed ive been picking a bit (altho picking at healthy foods) so i think this tuesday i will stay for the meeting (which i havent done since about week 3 lol) So needless to say not expecting a big loss this weekend but still hopefully a loss.

I bought joanne lees book a couple of days ago (the gf of peter falconio) and all i wanna do is sit down and read lol.

Was suppose to go to my xmas show tonite but i have to work till 7.30pm and then be back here at lunchtime tomorrow (and it starts at 7pm down at glenelg) so have decided not to go. Instead i think i will go home and watch one of foxtels box office movies.

Okies not much else to say - have a good weekend all !

Welps YAY me !!! I not only lost TWO KILOS but i also reached my 10% - man i was so excited at the meeting lol. And so that takes me to a total loss of 18.7 kilos. so only 1.3 kilos to lose to get to my 20 kilos which is definitely do able by xmas. Then went and met mum and we had breakfast at a cafe which was nice. Today I work 1-30pm-9.30pm these rotating shifts im adjusting to really well and food wise im having to plan more but its all working out. Okies just a short post today will do a longer one on wednesday or thursday on my days off !!!!

well omg ive barely been here lately lol. i really am not at the puter as much cos when i am (for chat) people i chat with arent...so havent been online quite as much. Friday nite i went out for dinner with people from work. We went to "east taste" which is in gouger street. And we had the funnest nite...omg i laffed so much. And didnt get home till 11.30pm. And today i am working till 3.30pm and then i will go home and i have decided at about 5.30pm i will go into north adelaide and have dinner at felinis and then go see santa claus 3 - its so long since i been to the movies. And whilst id prefer to go with someone ive decided to get out a bit more and do a few more things evening if they are by myself. Plus its a nice nite and will be home by 9.30pm ish and dont work till 11.30am.

Everything else is going pretty good...altho friday nites dinner was kinda fatty and i did have fried ice cream too !!! But i also kept filling my bowl (yanno those tiny lil chinese bowls) with steamed rice. Okies im out of here !!! Enjoy your weekend!!!

Well weighed in last night and had a loss of 300 grams...taking me to a total loss of 16.7 kilos. It is a small loss but I weighed in the evening instead of morning so im not too perturbed. Next week i will weigh in in the morning so that will be the real guage.

Not much else to say...went out sunday nite for dinner and then played the pokies - and won ! YAY me !!! Was only $25 but still a nice lil bonus.

I am actually rather enjoying these 9-5 shifts. Altho tomorrow I start at 8am as i have another day of training. But having the evenings free is really nice. Tonite should be home by 6.30pm (as long as i watch for the bus and dont let it go past without flaggin it down,,,,,as i did last nite lol)

Last nite i went to bed at 10.45pm and was asleep by about 20past 11 and slept thru till 8.30am...so im very well rested ! And making a point to make sure i get enuff sleep.

Friday nite which is my only day off this week i think i am going out for dinner - yum yum - ying chows in the city...okies time to scoot and get back and do some work ~!

Welps been a few days eh? I really have to make myself remember to start posting at home. Worked 9-5 thursday n friday and i coped with it much better then expected. And i really enjoyed having the evenings to potter around...i actually found i got more done. BUT the training....omg my head is agog...the new systems ill be using are quite complex and i am actually quite nervous about tomorrow. Its kinda like starting a new job....new product...new team...new work hours. I will be weighing in tomorrow nite...cos of the change from morning to evening weigh in im not expecting a big loss but still expecting a loss. A loss of 500 grams and i will be happy. Oh i forgot to mention last week when i weighed in the weigher who is always lovely to me and encouraging was like....oh u are doing so well...i can really tell you are losing weight now....which was real nice of her and a lil buzz.

So i work monday to thursday off friday and then work saturday to tuesday BLAH but i will come and post my weigh in result here tomorrow nite and then ill be back again friday !

Hope ur all having a good weekend

Well today is a bizarre day...everything feels out of whack but in a good kinda way. I started work at 2pm...had dinnerat 5.30pm (wow just like a normal person!) and i finish at 10pm tonite....its all very strange being so far into my shift and its still light. Dunno how ill feel tomorrow tho...going to need to be up at 7.30am im hoping to go to bed about midnight and be asleep by 12.30am that would still give me 7 hours and i should be good to go for the day. I finish at 5pm and then im gonna head to north park and pick up a few groceries and then have the evening at home. Which i am actually looking forward too...all very strange for me but i think as long as i keep on top of my sleep i should be right. I have valarian which i will prolly take tonite. The doc did give me a script for sleeping tablets but ill try n avoid them if possible unless i simply am not able to get adequate amount of sleep.

All else is going good...spot on with my food today in fact should be under points by about 3 by the end of the day. Okies off to do some work

well been a few days since i been here eh? i know everyone thinks when im not posting as much im not doing as good with my ww but not the case just been kinda busy !!! Actually i normally do my entries at work between calls but im gonna need to get into the habit of doing these from as from next week my work life is gonna have no spare time. Went out for lunch with tania on sunday...scored one sunburnt arm...yummy food...and great company,......including the adorable mr lachlan ! (7 months old and cute as a button !) the day did have a few mishaps but lol it all worked out good in the end.

This weeks a bit crazy...tomorrow i work 2pm-10pm and thursday & friday i work 9am-5pm then like a normal person i have the weekend off. And the real bonus is for the next few weeks i can do my grocery shopping on thursday night.

Oh and did i forget to mention how i went at weigh in? lol im a tease arent i??? I lose 1.7 kilos !!!!! So that takes the grand total to 16.4 kilos...so 1.7 kilos of my 10% and 3.6 kilos left to lose to get to 20 kilos by xmas day (with 5 weigh ins left) But i am about to be weighing in morning and evenings so my losses may vary a bit and i need to keep reminding myself of this. next two weeks will be evening weigh ins and so next week i wont expect a huge loss.

Okies chickas off to do some work - have a good nite all !

ugh i chipped my tooth. Its my main tooth on the top row right in front...i cant remember doing it but just noticed it today. So Monday i have a appointment with the dentist. I hate dentists all it means is huge bills and pain lol hopefully they can fix it...i spoke to the nurse and she said its highly unlikely theyd remove that tooth but i really do need to go. I also had a crown which fell out in my back tooth...(piece of crap dentists) it doesnt bother me so i havent worried about doing anything about it but i think when i go ill get them to do whatever to fix the front tooth first once thats all fixed and paid for ill then get a proper teeth clean and the back one fixed. I also have a feeling that on my bottom row they need to remove one cos it seems to me like they are too squished. And one tooth is moving cos of it. so yeh fun fun fun !!!!

Food wise ive been very good. Im more convinced then ever that i was retaining fluid as last nite i went to the toilet soooooo many times lol it was ridiculous really.

This bizarre crazy weather its now raining after a muggy morning ugh !!!

Okies off i go !

Well i gained lol was only 300 grams and im laughing cos im really not too concerned. Ill explain why. Sunday night i went to dinner at Bombay bicycle club which must be one of my fave restuarants. Now i did look at the menu before hand but being indian there really was nothing low in point so i decided sunday night would be a treat. So i ended up having a bruschetta...now this was no ordinary bruschetta...it was 4 piece of garlic bread with a bowl of the bruschetta mix with parmassen cheese on top and when u got to the bottom u could see the oil :( But omg soooooooo yummy (tania you would have loved it ! lol) then i had ummmma wood oven pizza which was dripping in cheese and was delishas well and umm 3 glasses of champagne so yep im sure im retaining some fluid right now plus ive had the odd stomach cramp so TOM may be coming.

But everything else is good...i remember what Tania said when she got engaged that events and things will happen and after all getting a social life for myself is part of this journey too ~!

Okies busy busy at work !!

Photos from 29/10/2006

Well here is the latest photos...they were taken oct 29, im back using this journal since myspace changed half my privacy settings and made it hard for people who were not myspace members to see my journal and pics.

October 24th

Well smacks myspace around...hopefully this post will update myspace wouldnt let me earlier. Im sorry i havent posted much the last week to be honest i was so busy relaxing and being lazy i forgot about journal entries hahahahahahah and the good news taaaaaaaadaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!!! 1.5 kilos lost at weigh in today wooooooooooo hoooooooooooo taken my total loss to 15.1 kilos...omg can u believe it? 4.9 kilos to lose and i will have lost 20 kilos which is my christmas goal...imma gonna do it !!! And its funny cos its today ive realised wow im really doing this not just playing around. After i weighed in i ran over to target and spent $83 on make up ! lol that was my 15 kilo reward and of course last week i bought myself a gold bracelet for losing 10 kilos. For my 10% reward i wont spend big...but i will buy a nice make up bag that day.
Not much else is happening....count down is on till i go on that damn rotating roster - oh can u hear the glee in my voice at the thought of it?
Sunday night this week i am going to the bicycle club for dinner mmmmmmmmm indian its a beautiful restuarant....ive decided i will have 2 or 3 champagnes and i will have whatever meal. I wont look at the points (altho i wont go silly) but i wont order dessert. ohhhhhhhhhhh and i will take photos before going out for dinner sunday night ! Jody calls them my prison shots but i will take new ones lol

Okies another quickpost my journal is now at http://myspace.com/kazzsjourney click on view blog and non myspace members can read the entries...but to see the whole site u may require a myspace log in. Leave a comment here or on the tagboard here if u ahve any problems


kazz =]

Super quick post...
1. i hate blogger and am gonna move my journal away from it
2. i hate this layout
3. i lost 1.4 kilos lol and have now lost 12.7 kilos more laterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

Reality Check....

Okies well i did it lol i took some updated photos...i have some from April 2006 where i am at my biggest (and even i can tell by looking at the photos the most miserable) and some taken today October 1. Lemme know if u see a difference...i do in my style of clothes and i dont look as miserable but not sure if i see a difference body wise. Taking these photos and looking at them has beeen a bit of a shock and made me realise how bad my situation was and to be honest still is...

April 2006



October 2006

Well I pulled out the tape measure today and measured myself. Last time i measured was 2 weeks ago...and ive lost now:

• bust : 2 centimetres
• waist : 6cm
• Hips : 5 cm
• thighs : 1cm

So very pleased with that. I think thats pretty awesome within 2 weeks. Altho I must admit i wasnt totally surprised as the last few days I have noticed my clothes are really getting baggy. Nice and quiet at work...im guessing everyone is watching the AFL grand final

And its saturday yay yay the weekend after this shift sooooooooo looking forward to a nice quiet relaxing weekend.

Okies time to wander off =]

had a bit of a revelation today - i DON'T WANT a relationship at the moment. Okies i dont really have a choice either...but was funny...have chatted a bit to a girl online...shes very nice and whatever and was talking to my friend Jody and told her i gave her the cold shoulder and made it obvious im not interested. And then i said to jody...im concerned of getting involved with anyone on any level and losing my focus on my weight loss. And then I told her...besides im more interested in my real now...now for the chick whose had numerous online relationships this is a big thing. Jody then said she noticed I seemed more content then in the past with the fact im single and doing my own thing. Its not that I dont wanna be in a relationship - I do...but for one thing i want it real...preferably someone in Adelaide...but not now once im more into this weight loss journey. I think its important first I totally get my head around this weight loss...and get my social life back and having fun...before I even think in that direction. And I feel good about that...im not thinking I need someone...and it makes me realise how important this weight loss and that it IS different to previous times and i AM here for the long haul! :)

well all is good again today. completing on points have eaten 11.5 points...dinner is 8 points and my snack 3 points & i also had a piece of fudge 1.5 points.....which puts me under for the day by 3 points.

Im wearing one of my new shirts and my team leader just said to me ... even your new shirts are starting to get too big...weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee yay me !!!!

I talked in yahoo to one of the girls on the ww forum last night and promised i would upload some photos this weekend...so look out for some pics this weekend !

I feel really good today...i feel as if this week i can have a real solid loss...its only day 3 but i been real good no eating when i get home from work, have had my 2 litres of water first think in the morning. And last time i did this i had a big loss now im not expecting a big loss of 3.2 kilos but am aiming for between 1kilos and 1.5 kilos. Altho i try not to set myself up for disappointment and aim for just 500 grams to 1 kilos.

Not much going on this weekend i may walk around to mums again on sunday. And possibly going out to dinner with the parents sunday night. Okies back to work lalalallalalalalal its a good day!!!!

Well I did it! I booked the accomodation for the trip to the goldcoast next march. This is where ill be staying http://abfab2007.stellaresorts.com.au/Resorts/?resort=1060 so now I have a date 29th March to lose in total 31 kilos...so ive lost 11.3 kilos now so 19.7 kilos left to lose which I think is completely doable. I have booked to arrive there 29/3/06 and leave to come home 3/4/07 which would be 5 days. Which would be a real nice break without being too long. So now my goal by melbourne day is to lose another 4.6 kilos....and by xmas day to lose 9.6 kilos. so its action jackson !!! But all are do able goals i think (remind me of this if i dont make any of my goals) Theres not really much else to say...ohhh i ate a meat pie today! Now if my sister is reading this she will laff cos i loveeeeeeee meat pies...but it was my first since going on ww and i worked it into my points (ill stillhave 3.5 points spare with eating it) and yanno it was nice but was nothing to rave about. Okies thats all for today...enjoy ur night all =]

well a supoer quick post cos i was post more from work but another loss - this week 800 grams taking me to a total of 11.3 kilos which im more then happy with - till later =]

Well im back,,,,and think i have made a exciting decision ! The girls on the ww forum are planning to meet up on the gold coast next march (so 6 months away) and im seriously considering going, i mean by then i should have lost another 20 kilos. So whilst the plane trip still wouldnt be greatly comfortable i think its prolly completely do able. And i LOVE the gold coast I went there 10 years or so ago and had a great time. I loved movie world and it would be nice to go there again and of course do some shopping. I think Ive pretty much decided im going,,,,jsut neeed to find out if we are staying at a specific hotel or what. I dont care if we all stay at hotel of our own choice im kinda independant and like doing my own thing as well so this will be cool. And the thought of it is real exciting...and would be a great goal to help with keeping motivated and focussed with the weight loss.

Last time i went away was when i went to sydney (apart from a trip to streaky) when i was depressed over Ang still in what should have been a fun weekend i was sad and mopey all weekend...but thats 2 years ago...and now i say....hell let me go and have some fun !!!!


okies back to that thing called work =]

Well its the weekenddddddddddddddddddddddddd

Went for a walk around to mums which was a 37 minute walk...my calfs feel very tired now. So I need to keep that in mind when I go and weigh in as i may have built up some muscle

Thanks kay for that message about the 1626 clearance centre i may go there tomorrow. Have been very good with my food, even had a treat of a freddo frog lol. This morning i made a fruit muffin while i was djing ate half and then completely forgot about the other half for like a hour - who woulda eva thought id do that and forget about my food lol.

oh i found a new yummy lean cuisine frozen dinner - okies maybe its not new maybe im just slow. hahahah anyway its totellini creamy mushroom alla panna mmmmmmmmmmmm so yummmmmmm

Okies thats enuff i will be back tuesday at the latest !


=]

Elloz all =]

Good to see u back online jaxx...i checked your journal look forward to the next update and tania yessssssssss we do need to catch up. I sent you a email...reply when you get a chance my sundays are free...up until nov 13th

Todays going good...i ended up going to the doctor yesterday about my headaches. Turns out the muscles in my neck were spasming (prolly occurred when i did those exercises that pulled the stomch muscles) anyway so the doc said 2 panadols 4 times a day and use a heat pad on it. And its so much better already my necks not sore today and no headache =]

I am actually starting to want to do more walking. So this weekend i think i will venture thru prospect on the other side of main north road. i wish there was a nice park or something around where i lived where i could walk to...nice gardens or something..

Okies not much else to say....nearly home time YaY !!!

okies you ALL need to do a dance with me !!!!!! Cos woooooooooooo hooooooooooooo i lost 3.2 kilos this week -stunned, falls over & faints lol-

So i have now lost 10.5 kilos...i am 500 grams of my september goal weight and only 9.5 kilos to lost by xmas to have lost 20 kilos by xmas day ( i can do it !!!) And now when i look back im glad i had the kfc..i had it that one night...got it out of my system and im now so on track it aint funny !

Okies on to other stuff....went shopping for some new tops on the weekend and a nightie. I went to target and OMG all their tops are see thru....no way im paying $40-$50 for a top ill prolly wear 8 weeks at the most that is bloomin see thru! So i went to best n less and bought 3 tops and a nightie for $80. The nightie fits me...wore it all day yesterday lol (how damn lazy is that lol) and 2 of the tops fit me and fit me really nicely...one is more fitted but another 3-4 kilos and it should fit me. wooooooooo hooooooooooooooo

Yesterday i was very lazy and stayed home. But was nice having a day of just relaxing and me time...okies off i go wooooooooooooooo hooooooooooooo so damn happy lol

wooooooo hoooooooo !!!!

my first compliment today !!!! Was at work eating one of my ww desserts and my old team leader came over and asked me if ive been losing weight...i told her yes and she turned around and said you can really tell. Also coming into work today i came to the conclusion my fave jumper is too big ! LOL especially across my shoulders its kinda getting to the point of ridiculous lol So tomorrow i will drop into target and best & less and hopefully pick up a couple of tops. I would prefer to not spend too much money but at the same time i think hell i deserve to look good !

I am djing tomorrow (sunday 12.30-2.30pm adelaide time) so if u wanna listen...just load up http://www.we-rock-radio.com and you will hear me.

Tomorrow nite im maked baked lemon chicken and fried rice mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Well i hope everyone is having a good weekend mine starts in just under 5 hours and i cannot wait


kazz =]

its amazing how 5 days ago my headspace was all "here we go again i quit" and now today i feel more committed to the weight loss then ever. My jeans are feeling lose again and i have been spot on with my food AND my water. Ive done the ww thing ebfore and never really focused on the water im now convinced its a big part of it. I am hoping for a good solid loss this week but i dont wanna end up disappointed so 500 grams and i will be happy. Laying in bed last nite thinking (and omg i have been freezing at nite time the last few nites) that realistically....i would like to lose 20 kilos every 6 months. Which would meanmid 2008 i would be totally at a weight id be more then happy with...admittedly once i get closer it will be harder to do. So febuary is 6 months...but i actually am gonna aim for my first 20 kilo loss by xmas but if i dont by febuary 1. which basically puts me at 13.3 kilos to lose in approximately 14 weeks...so a challenge but completely doable. I bid on some clothes today on ebay...hopefully i get them...a pair of new cargo pants and a dressy top for going out. Okies i gotta get back to work...enjoy your weekend all =]

Okies saw this on Jaxxs site and it looked fun so here we go

1. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
2. Swam with wild dolphins
3. Climbed a mountain
4. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
5. Been inside the Great Pyramid
6. Held a tarantula
7. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
8. Said "I love you" and meant it <---Ang of course
9. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby's diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon <--no but i sooooo wanna do that !
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne <--- hahahahha well duh
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign <---hahahaha omg yes !!!!
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Posed nude in front of strangers
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days <---as if lol
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an expert
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Eaten fugu (pufferfish)
89. Had a one-night stand
90. Gone to Thailand
91. Bought a house
92. Been in a combat zone
93. Buried one/both of your parents
94. Been on a cruise ship
95. Spoken more than one language fluently
96. Performed in Rocky Horror Picture Show
97. Raised children
98. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
105. Written articles for a major publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Petted a stingray
110. Broken someone's heart
111.Riden a bike
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Petted a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and The Odyssey
135. Selected one important author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone's life


A lot of them are kinda cool lots of things there id like to do...kinda like "life lists" of the ellen show. Btw does anyone watch that??? i love that show. oooo played in a gammon tournament online today and won yay me...gawd they are addictive lol

okies out of here =]

welll bad news...well not really bad and not unexpected lol

i knew i was building up to a NEED (not a want a need understand lol) for KFC and sunday nite just 36 hours before weigh in i gave in and had it...and had a lil more then i should have and that with not exercising the last 4 days of the week and no water for 3 or 4 days i had a 400 gram gain :(

Actually not that bad...i expected the loss..and if i didnt have that loss i know next week i would have. but ive been back on track since monday now. And tonight i will exercise a lil and tomorrow will do a full exercise thingy...

When you know WHY you gained it really is not stressful...its when u dont know why.

My pulled muscles all seem settled now...a lil sore still but not much. Altho it really makes you the wonders of a personal trainer altho at this point i dont think im ready for a gym...altho soon i will to go swimming.

Im kinda bored with my frozen meals at the moment but dont like diverting away from them as they really give me portion control which i really need

Okies out of here ~ toodles

well what a blah couple of days. Yanno u do the right thing and it still comes and bites you on the ass ! I changed the arm exercises with weights slightly the other day and turns out i pulled muscles. The muscles under your rib cage and they freaking hurt. Even when i walk they kinda vibrate LOL And cos of it ive used it as a excuse not to drink water (dont even ask the theory behind that) and didnt drink water and today i been picking. So as of tomorrow back on track with that. ive prolly still been well within points using points not used during the week. And for the first time its been like...hmmm kfc would be good about now....i read on the ww forum...that breaking 10 kilos is quite a wall to break down that many give up around now. but im over 3/4 to that goal so no way i am...tomorrow i will get back on the water.

Hope everyones weekend is going good...i just put a colour on my hair hopefully it turns out

Isnt it great how good you feel when your weight is in control. When my weight is out of control...i "hide" i consume myself in online life and consume myself with food...that after a while doesnt even taste that great. Then when i get my weight loss in control I wanna dress nicer...I wanna spend money on me...on clothes...jewellery...my hair... and then it even extends just to wanting to do more things wanting to not sit in front of the tv or computer so much. And as im discoverring its even leading me to plan more not just for today but for 12 months time...2 years time...things that normally i wouldnt even think about.

My jeans are really getting looser im starting to really notice it...which is grand after wearing clothes growing tighter everyday to be in loose clothes and to realise they are getting looser is SUCH a good feeling.

And now its even amazing that my knees are hurting less. The waist on my jeans are getting looser but im not noticing a difference in my thighs at this point. I just posted on the ww site for some suggestions for exercises to pinpoint the thighs. Will be good when my bathers fit me and i can go swimming. Okies tea time so off i go :)

Well weigh in over and done with and it went very well ;) I actually had a loss of 1.3 kilos so as its TOM and I had 2 celebrations last week im very impressed with that, as I walked in I was mumbling to myself lol 500 grams please 500 grams LOL so that gave me a loss of 1.3 kilos. I feel like I have things figured out now things are clicking. I set a mini goal for end of september to lose 4.6 kilos....so 3.3 kilos left yay

okies ill write more later after the presentation at work :)

Well its now later in the day...i still cant really say whats going on blah but i really wont know anything definite till start of October so shall put work out of my mind (well cept for the fact im at work lol)

The challenge this week for BLC was to do some thing 3 times thats out of my comfort zone. I prolly woulda liked to do that and ride a bike...except I dont have one,,,,thats something I do need to get tho I think id enjoy that.

Decided sunday I am going into town. Prouds have some gorgeous fiorelli watches on special for $69.99 so think I will get one as my 5 kilos reward and I mite go wander in the bookshop too and pick up a book or two. And then on monday I am getting foxtel IQ installed wooooo hoooooo i can start recording shows like gilmore gurls and yessssssssss jaxx huge gilmore gurls fan, and also huge wills n grace fan...lol...Jack cracks me up

Okies off to work I go hugsssssssssssssssssssssssss

PS thanks for all the comments i LOVE getting them !!!!

Well weigh in day tomorrow. Not really sure how ill go, ive been good this week (if u exclude a slice of cake, 4 lollies and 2 glasses of champagne) but its also TOM sooooooo no idea how ill go i do feel kinda bloated, am hoping for a small loss still tho.

Have had a good weekend, yesterday was lazy and unproductive lol today ive been busyshopping, cleaning etc and this evening been relaxing in front of the tv watching gilmore gurls. ( loveeeeeeeeeeeeee that show) Tomorrow at work have a presentation to go to regarding restructuring etc have a strong sneaky suspicion about what were gonna be told (not the best news but not the worst either) ill fill u all in tomorrow more. This week i am also going looking for something from the jewellery store for my 5 kilos award...will see what i find. Okies gonna go watch just shoot me before sleep...ni ni all :)

Well the winds are a changingggggggggg lol

Funny how things change...people may or may not know that i chat...being a lesbian i chat in a gurls chat room...and in actually fact run the girls chat room server (called Femme Fantaziez lol) anyway the last few weeks ive noticed ive been pulling away..either in there bored today i actually got to the point where i thought i should pull the server down then decided not too for the sake of the gurls. Its easy when you arent happy with yourself to lock yourself in the chat world...dont get me wrong im sure id never give it up entirely ive made some really good friends there...but im getting to a point now where i dont want or feel the need of it. I do graphics for chat and i dont actually need to be in the room to do it i can do it via my internet explorer. The good thing about them is i find doing graphics is so relaxing and consuming that i forget to eat especilly in the afternoon at snacktime which is a good thing. But anyway im really getting to the point of wanting to do other things. But i dont feel confident enuff to just go out and meet more people etc, but im really wanting to get myself more on focussing on me and self improvement...but i guess cutting back on chat its highlighting to me that a lot my friendships are based online. So in a very strange mood...not exactly negative...but kinda like somethings wrong...but its not like i can go this is whats wrong...maybe its just one of the changes and things i am learning in this journey.

Okies time to go

kazz =]

So yesterday didnt quite go to plan...lol after the cake after work we ended up going out for a few drinks...so a couple of champganes later and i was ticking over hahhaha but all is good cos i9t waas fun and not often i get to have a few drinks. The rest of the time till weigh in should be safe except for sunday nite which am going out for fathers day and the problem is..my parents live on counter meal kind of tucker. And we are going out to dinner at one of the pubs...and so my choices is extremely limited...in fact i think the only relatively healthy option is lasagne but it has lots of cheese in it so not too healthy they do ahve a yummy pasta dish...it is too die for ,,,,, but its cream based and so i will avoid it.

Tania - yes yes yes to lunch at glenelg soon...sounds great to me - specially with these nicer days we are having !!! Everything else is going good...i plan to spend a bit of time outside this weekend...even if it means sitting out in the courtyard reading...such nice weather we are having !

I hope everyone elses week and about to be weekend is going good !!!

kazz =]